I just wish there was something I could do!
DidiOh! [the doorbell rings] Who on earth could that be?
[Stu walks up to the front door and opens it. A rich man is on the other side]
WSWinston St. George
Mr. Pickles?
WSWinston St. George
My name is Winston St. George. [as he talks to Stu, he removes his monocole and wipes it with a piece of cloth] Two weeks ago, I was walking down the street when I spied a rare Siberian Tiger Hound worth thousands. I was tempted to keep him to breed, but then I saw your ad.
[Spike jumps into Stu's arms and pants happily]
WSWinston St. George
Spike, eh? Well, I've been calling him Nightscroft's Squire Muldoon.
[cut to king and queen on their throne; trumpets herald the arrival of a "knight"]
HHeralder
And now, let the jousting tournaments beginnith!
Didi
Oh, look! It's the good knight.
Look at the sheeps? What are you looking for Chuckie?
If there's a knight, there's got to be a dragon around here somewhere!
Didi
Stu, have you seen my running shoes?
Yea, they're really nice.
Didi
No, they're missing! In fact, all my shoes are missing.
How can a woman lose sixteen pairs of shoes?
Didi
I do not have sixteen pairs! It's more like five.
OOfficer
I understand, Stu.
Didi
Don't worry, attorney.
[Grandpa wakes up in shock.] Huh? Wha? What?!
You said you'd watch the kids, remember?
Oh, of course I remember.
Didi
Why don't you call Zippy's Snappy Delivery Deli and just order some lunch for you and the kids? The number's on the speed dial. Just tell them to put it on the Pickles' account.
"Angelica, Mommy has to run to a meeting. Give me a kiss!"
[Angelica blows a kiss at Charlotte. Charlotte blows a kiss back at her, then walks away. Didi walks up to Tommy.]
Didi
"Bye-bye, Sweetums! Be a good boy."
[Tommy giggles as Didi pats his head. As Didi walks away, Stu waves at Tommy.]
[Stu walks away. Didi walks past Grandpa and waves at him.]
Didi
"See you in a while, Pop!" [Didi follows Stu, then stops, and turns to face Grandpa.] Oh, and we're trying to take care of their teeth, so, don't order them any junk food, or... or I'll take your teeth away."
[Tommy stares in shock and gasps when he hears this.]
Hey, Aunt Didi, Aunt Betty! Wanna hear the song I'm singing for the fall festival parade?
[Didi and Betty walk up to Angelica]
Didi
Uh, thank you, Angelica, but we've heard it several times already!
All right, I'll sing it again!
[sighs] When we take the pups to the amusement park tomorrow night, let's dress them up as monsters! That way, they'll feel more scary than anything they see!
Didi
You mean, empower them by tapping into their inner monster?
Oh, I think it's a wonderful idea! Kimi can be a witch, and Chuckie can be, um... uh... a werewolf!
A werewolf? I don't know.
Come on, Chas. Frightening people is what Halloween is all about!
[giggles] Choo-choo, train! Hey, Mr. Train! Choo-choo! [laughs] Choo-choo, everybody!
You're good with trains, Chuckie!
Choo-choo! A funny train, too. Choo-choo!
[In the kitchen, Minka and Boris are showing Stu and Didi a guide booklet about a scenic train ride. Stu is reading the paper, and looks over nervously at Chuckie playing with his toy train]
An old-fashioned train, taking us to Little Biendeltown. It's like a dream come true. [hands the booklet to Didi]
Didi
Biendeltown? "A recreation of the Old Country with all its' whimsical charms."
BBoris
Whimsical, schmimsical. It's got dust and a yak. For this I need a two-day train ride?!
What do you know? [to Didi] It's our second honeymoon! Why don't you all come with us?
Didi
On your honeymoon?
What? I'm gonna talk to HIM for eighteen hours? [points to Boris eating his meal]
Didi
I've never been on a scenic train trip before. Think of the sights we'll see on the way! Doesn't that sound fun, Stu?
[Stu looks up from his newspaper and grins nervously. Back in the playpen, Chuckie continues playing with his toy train]
Choo-choo! Choo-choo, everybody!
Didi
Oh, kids! Guess what? We're going to ride on a real train! We even get to sleep on it overnight. Isn't that exciting? [walks back into the kitchen]
With the wheelies and the chugga-chugga and everything!
What do you mean, Chuckie? I thought you love trains.
REAL trains don't have a string to pull with. They just go all by themselves! Nothing can stop them!
It's OK, Chuckie. A real train's just like your toy train. It just needs to be bigger-er so the grownups can play with them!
[picks up his toy engine] I don't know, Tommy. It's kinda scary.
Well, we'll all be there and, um... I know! You can bring your old pal Wawa!
Yeah! So I won't be a-scared all by myself.
[It cuts to Drew's house. In the kitchen, Charlotte is trying to type on her laptop computer as Angelica plays with her Cynthia doll]
Charlotte, this is a family trip. Two relaxing days on a train. I want you to promise: NO business. [closes the screen on Charlotte's laptop]
[opens her laptop] Well, I don't see why a person ca...
[clears throat] Charlotte!
[annoyed] All right, fine!
[to her Cynthia doll] You hear that, Cynthia? We're going on a train trip! Time to break out all those extra EXTRA special accessories. [leaves the kitchen with Cynthia]
[Some time later, it cuts to the city train station. A singing bird flies past. But then]
[Everyone starts to board the train. Didi and Kira walk up to the babies]
Didi
Come on, kids. We're going on the train! [they walk on board]
[Angelica walks up to the train with her Cynthia and a small dollhouse with a carrying handle]
[with a flourish] Well, Cynthia, say goodbye to your home! Maybe we'll come back someday; maybe not. Angelica Pickles follows the feet of a different plumber! [boards the train]
[Inside one of the Pullman compartments, Didi and Kira are looking at a map while Didi holds Dil]
Didi
And after the train passes each landmark, we can mark it with a little check.
You really have this worked out!
[Across from them, Didi and Kira are looking out the window with their guide booklet while holding Dil]
The first sight should be coming up any second: Vegetable Rock! [hands the booklet to Didi]
Didi
"Thrill to the spectacle of a natural stone formation in the shape of an asparagus." [looks out the window with Kira] This is what it's all about.
[Kira nods. But then Dil spits up]
Didi
Oh, dear.
[The train passes Vegetable Rock, but Didi and Kira miss it]
I'll get some more napkins. [gets some]
Didi
It's just baby stuff. It's not a real problem...
There we go. [wipes Dil's mouth]
[The train departs the station, and we see the main adults inside the lounge car with the two detectives and Dwayne serving coffee]
1Detective 1
[with a notepad] I need you to report any suspicious activities you might have witnessed.
[softly to the detective] Uh, between you and me, I never liked the looks of that guy. [gestures to Dwayne]
DDwayne
Anyone want coffee?
[holding a cup] All right, Dwaynie! Java me up!
[Dwayne pours coffee into Betty's cup]
And I wanted so much for this to be our second honeymoon. [she looks at Boris sleeping and frowns, but when she turns her head Boris smiles]
[looking at the route map] We should be near Cough Drop Pass.
Didi
[reading from the guide booklet] Where years of natural erosion have formed the stone replica of soothing lozenge.
[Didi and Kira start to look out the window, but Detective 1 walks up to them]
1Detective 1
I have a couple of questions; standard procedure, if you'll come this way.
[Didi and Kira look at each other and then get up, just missing the Cough Drop Pass as the train passes by it. Drew and Stu are standing around looking bored]
Yeah, OK, there's a thief. [gets an idea] Wanna sneak out and have some fun?
[Drew whispers in Stu's ear, and Stu grins and they high-five. The train continues chugging on as the engine's whistle blows, and in their compartment, the babies watch as Grandpa Lou enters]
OK, sprouts. I'll be taking the next watch to keep you out of trouble.
[The episode starts with a leaf falling down to the picnic table. Betty walks up to the table. Camera pans right to Chaz, who is making the salad. The wind blows it away]
Do you think it's too late in the season for this, bro?
Come on. Scared of a little wind? [He laughed]
[Howard just dropped a bun to the bottom of the picnic table. Phil grabs the bun. Cut to the babies]
I like making barbecues. Especially when you play in your food.
Pass the potato bug salad, Chuckie.
Coming right up. We're not going to eat you.
[Angelica takes the bug burger from Phil, she screamed. The babies laughed]
LLulu
They have a club somewhere across the Caribbean.
MMiriam
And not just the Caribbean. Club Fred!
Club Fred? Hey, I heard of that place. Traded very fancy.
You mean traded very expensive.
And look what it cost. It's 100% free.
It's not free. It's says two for one coupons.
One senior will each pay with adult admission.
MMiriam
It's the best of them all.
LLulu
You said it, sister. It'll be a swell vacation.
Vacation from what? You're all retired.
MMiriam
They said it's Club Fred. So they allow elders.
You hear that, guys? We're going on vacation!
Didi
Club Fred? That sounds like fun.
[The chef hat is blown from Stu's head]
You hear that, pups? We're going on vacation. THAT MEANS FUN, FUN, FUN!!!
[Cut to a plane flying to the mentioned location. At Club Fred, they are dropped off to the entrance]
[admiring] Oh, so beautiful!
[The others walk in]
What's this vacation gonna be like, Mommy?
It's a club full of people and have helpers to get us whatever we want.
[She gives the luggage to one of them. They walk with the others]
No, it's for Dil! We gots to wash all the baby power off! Come on, pass it down! [passes it to Phil, who passes it to Lil, who passes it to Chuckie, who passes it to Kimi, who walks over to Dil and pours it on him]
[Dil busts out crying]
Oh no, he's cryin'! He's gonna shake everything again! [holds his helmet]
We washed the power off! Tommy, you're the smartest.
[another earthquake starts]
Uh-oh. Now, you're dumb again.
Didi
[entering] It's OK, Dil. Mommy's coming. Oh, your diaper is wet, sweetums. And so's your head?! [wipes water off his head with her hand] Boy! When you have to go, you have to go! [picks Dil up]
Dil has to go and it's all 'cause of me!
How come washing Dilly's power off didn't work?
Must've already rubbed in.
Well, maybe we could keep him from using his powers.
That's it! We'll just make sure he doesn't move around! Ever!
Rugrats · 173 quotes
