[Tommy cries, and the camera zooms in on his mouth. Stu hears the crying and turns his attention to it, as do Grandpa and Minka. Howard hears the crying, then looks at Angelica, who innocently pretends not to. Didi runs up to Tommy]
DidiWhat's wrong, Tommy? What happened? [picks up Tommy and coos at him] Oh, boo-boo, what's the matter, baby? [as she lifts Tommy up, Tommy sees his ball behind the fence in a neighbor's yard. A light shines on the ball as the camera zooms in on it, then Tommy stops crying] All better now.
[Tommy opens his eyes. He is in his crib as Stu and Didi hang a banner that says, HAPPY BIRTHDAY in yellow letters on it]
SDStu and Didi
Happy Birthday, Tommy.
[Stu blows a noisemaker and throws confetti, which lands on Tommy, who is wearing a red shirt rather than the light blue one he would wear later throughout the series]
Didi
You're a whole year old today.
And boy, have we got some great presents for you. [Tommy giggles as Didi picks him up. Didi then kisses him on his forehead. Tommy giggles as Didi lays him down on his changing table. She pulls up his shirt, and untapes Tommy's dirty diaper. Tommy coos as Didi changes his diaper] Wait til' he sees my present, Didi. Did I tell you about the Hoverama prototype?
Didi
Uh-huh, you did, Stu.
Picture this, Didi. The body's thirty-six inches long and about four feet diameter and... [before he can finish, Didi lifts Tommy's legs] Yikes!
Didi
Oh, just put it in the pail, Stu, and hand me a fresh diaper!
Didi
Oh, my, you have a terrible fever, honey!
[Just then, Stu enters the room, at which point we pan back to Tommy's view of his family. As Stu enters, his normal human figure transforms into the cloud figure on Tommy's mobile and starts floating around the room. The room then transforms into outer space, with Tommy on top of the half-moon, as he's still in his mother's arms at this point. Tommy moans]
Didi
It's a fever, Stu. He's burning up! I wonder how he came down with it so fast?
I'll go call Dr. Schachter.
Didi
Poor little thing!
Maybe Phil and Lil gave it to him, I know I didn't, did I?
[Grandpa Lou is now in the room, he appears to Tommy as the airplane on his mobile]
Awe, you guys call that doc every time the little fellow's got a hiccup. Now in my day...
[Appearing as the star on Tommy's mobile] Pop, why don't you get the thermometer.
Thermometer? Why the boy's just got a chill! All you've gotta do is turn him upside down...
[cutting him off] Never mind. I'll get it.
Now just get some apple sauce and an old sock big enough for his head.
Didi
Let him finish.
I was just saying, you turn him upside down and then feed him the apple sauce.
I remember that one, it was apple sauce everywhere.
Didi
Maybe we should try it.
We're not doing the apple sauce! It didn't work, then it doesn't work now. Anyway, the doctor said not to worry to just give him his baby drops and call in the morning.
Maybe Chuckie came over and opened his window.
[now with the thermometer] Found it.
You kids just didn't have the stomach for the apple sauce cure.
Not the apple sauce cure.
[bored] How many miles, Pop?
Fifteen miles to school for your information in the snow, with no shoes!
Come on, Champ, here we go.
[Stu is now holding Tommy, making Tommy appear on the cloud in his hallucination as he takes his temperature. As soon as his temperature is taken, we cut back to a shot of everybody as humans, Didi is now looking through one of her Lipchitz books]
Didi
It says here in Lipschitz to put a radio under his or her pillow.
Our radio's bigger than his pillow.
I don't see what the big fuss is all about, he's just faking it.
Didi
Or it says we could sing him or her a lullaby! Do we know any?
Didi
You think?
Didi
Oh, Betty, that was Mr. Fluffles, Tommy's favorite lamp. [Tommy cries] There, there sweetie.
[Tommy crying continues]
What happened? I was taking my nap and I heard a loud sound.
Didi
Oh, honey, one of the babies broke the lamp Uncle Stu made for Tommy.
Awww, Mr. Fluffle-luffles?
Didi
I'm afraid so, honey.
You know, I saw a lamp just like that one at Baby World last week; let's call 'em and see if they still got any.
Didi
Great idea, Betty.
Come on, champ. Now, where to first, gang?
I want to go on a ride, Uncle Stu.
Didi
Which ride, sweetheart?
[Angelica sees a ride called the Nause-O-Whirl.]
Didi
Oh, I don't know, Stu. That looks way too scary for a little girl. Honey, don't you think it would be more fun to go on a ride like that one?
[Didi tries to convince Angelica to go on a ride called Snail Adventure (where the kids look thoroughly bored).]
I want to go on the Nause-O-Whirl! I want to go on the Nause-O-Whirl!
Let her go. Everybody's got to get scared stiff at some point in their lives. Might as well be when they're three years old.
[At the Clam Canyon, Tommy and Angelica eat ice cream while Stu and Didi split a bucket of clams]
This food was worth the whole trip.
Didi
I'll say, you never know where you'll find good seafood.
You know, Angelica, this Clam Canyon is great but I think I had more fun at the Graham Canyon.
[last words] It's GRAND Canyon. [to Cynthia] Cynthia, it's impossible to teach babies anything.
[The episode credits play over a pattern of red, green, and blue dots that move around]
[The dots zoom out, revealing that they make up the display on the Pickles' TV set; Tommy is standing very close to the screen, watching the man talk]
MOMan on TV
I knew right then I had snagged me a walla pike.
[the camera pans over to Grandpa, who has fallen asleep in his chair and is still holding the remote]
Didi
[walks into the living room, gasps loudly when she sees Tommy standing so close to the set, and walks over to him] No, no, no, honey! [lifts up Tommy and looks at him] Don't you know that focusing so closely on images can permanently damage your vision?
[As she talks, she looks closer into Tommy's eyes, which go cross-eyed, causing Tommy to see multiple copies of Didi's face. He quickly uncrosses his eyes, making his vision go back to normal. Didi sets Tommy down on the floor so he can crawl around, then approaches Grandpa, takes the remote from him without waking him up, sits down on the couch, and changes the channel from the fishing show to what looks like a talk show, but with a donkey as the host]
Didi
Time to say, bye-bye, sweetie. [Tommy starts bawling] Oh, what's that matter sweetie.
Of course, it's me, you babies! There's going to be trouble! That does it!
But, Angelica, I don't have to...
[she slapped his mouth] Quiet, Tommy. My daddy says that your show is the biggest gravy-train in town.
Gosh. After Happy Bear almost got caught by the Taxidermist, I couldn't sleep for days.
PPaul
Mr. Finster, have you Talked to a psychiatrist about this?
PPaul
[yelling] What's wrong with you people?! Don't you have any real lives outside of this mindless cartoon!?!
[dumbfounded] Well, really? We just thought you liked to hear from a few of your fans.
[confused] How can the creator of Happy Bear be so cruel?
RRandy
Wait a minute, Paul. I can explain everything. [After Randy notices his neighbors at his house unexpectedly]
Now if this doesn't work, I quit!
[Angelica picked up the mushed food and threw it at Paul, causing his toupee to fall off into the soup.]
RRandy
Oh, I'm sorry, Paul, let me get that for you.
[Paul shunned Randy from picking up his toupee as Paul picked it up and placed the damp toupee on his head. He then picked up mushed food and threw it at Drew.]
[Paul laughed as a playful food fight began.]
PPaul
Randy, I do not know how you did it but these guys really crack me up! You're a Comedy Genius!
[During the food fight, with food splattered on the archway above the babies' heads.]
Eww! Now what are they doing?
I don't know, but it looks like they're having fun.
SSusie
Fun?! Oh NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! [starts to cry, the camera zooms into her mouth and swerves behind her uvula showing the shot from the inside as Paul wandered up]
PPaul
Aww, what's the matter, Susie?
SSusie
Now, we're gonna have to move because my daddy's gonna get a new house!
PPaul
Move?! Randy, you jokester. I'd never allow it. With all these wild characters in the neighborhood. It's a writer's gold mine! In fact, how would you kids and your parents like to come down and see the Dummi Bears Studio tour?
Aww, do we have to... [Drew muffles Angelica]
[Randy splatters green gelatin all over himself. The next scene you see Randy guiding Paul to the car.]
RRandy
Paul, I'm so glad you came. We'll have to have you back again.
[Stu jumps out of a nearby bush.]
RRandy
Yeah, well, I'll see you at the office, huh?
[Randy chuckled as he and Paul continued on their way. Stu dreamily fell into Drew's arms.]
Wow. He looked right at me. That man has changed by life! Man, we didn't need words.
[?]
CClown
Look kid. It's just an act. Under this freak show, I'm a regular guy. Just like your dad.
[?]
Didi
Maybe we better go.
[?]
Why do I have to go? I wasn't crying.
RRingmaster
Sorry, folks, no refunds.
Didi
I'm glad we left. I'd forgotten how unsanitary circuses are.
Come on, Deed. Circuses are an American institution. They're part of growing up. Kids love the circus.
Chuckie, it's all over now.
Hey, thanks for bailing me all back there, Tommy. I felt really stupid crying all by myself.
It's not fair. We didn't get to see any of the good stuff all because those babies started crying.
Angel, you got to see a lot of good stuff. Remember that big scary lion.
That dumb old lion didn't even have any teeth.
And you got cotton candy and popcorn. And Daddy even bought you that nice stuff turtle he was screaming for.
Stupid turtle. It doesn't even do anything.
What do you expect for $16.95.
The whole circus was dumb.
Not now, cupcake, I suppose if you have the circus, you can do everything your way.
If I ran the circus. Hmm.
Didi
Stu, what are you doing?
Making chocolate pudding.
Didi
It's 4:00 in the morning! Why on earth are you making chocolate pudding?
[tired deadpan] Because I've lost control of my life.
[watching TV in a queen bed] Ah ha ha ha ha!
Here's your pudding, Angelica.
Oh, that's okay, Uncle Stu. I'm not hungry anymore.
[Cut to outside the house as Stu screams like a girl]
Rugrats · 173 quotes
