Phineas quotes from Phineas and Ferb

Phineas

We're gonna make the best dang car wash in the dang tristate area, dangit! ...I can't really pull that off, can I?

Ferb

You're not very street.

Candace

[singing] I'm gonna move to the prairie, and change my name to Larry!

Phineas

Larry?!

Candace

I ran out of rhymes, all right?

Irving

Hey, can I say the Perry thing?

Phineas

What?

Irving

You know, when you say, "Where's Perry?"

Phineas

Okay...?

Irving

Where's Perry? Wait! Wait! I can do better! Where's Perry? Where is Perry? Wherefore art thou Perry? I wonder where that Perry went. Ooh! Where is that platypus? Where the P-man at?

Phineas

Now this is a ship. My, she's yar. Is she ready to sail?

Ferb

She's shipshape in Bristol fashion.

Phineas

What does that mean?

Ferb

What does "yar" mean?

[offscreen] Baljeet! The Patels are here!

Baljeet

[opens the door] Coming, Mish-taah…! [shocked to see that Mishti is somehow looking much older and flirterous]

Hi, Baljeet!

Baljeet

[slams the bathroom door and starts to hyperventilate; end of flashback] So after hiding in the bathroom, I jumped out the window and came over here as quickly as possible. I do not even know how to act in front of a girl! I do not even know what girls like.

Phineas

Hm. Isn't it like "sugar and spice, and everything nice"?

Baljeet

That is what they are made of. I do not want to build one. Duh!

Phineas

Y'know, I think what girls really like is romance.

Baljeet

Romance?

Phineas

Yeah, we learned all about it in this movie we watched last night. Dinner, music, candlelight, and all on a romantic cruise over the ocean blue. Lucky for you, we happen to have a ship right here. Ferb, cancel the giant bottle. I know what we're going to do today. Hey, where's Perry?

Phineas

So, do I know romance or what?

Isabella

What.

Isabella

I heard you.

Phineas

Okay, what the heck is that sound? Come on, Ferb, I know we're not gonna do today. We're not figured out what we were gonna do today as the noise keeps up.

Candace

If you don't stop that racket, I'm so gonna bust you, empty backyard?

Stacy

[closes window] Candace, stop trying to bust your backyard.

Phineas

Is everything okay?

Baljeet

If by okay, you mean that my life is a meaningless, black cauldron of swirling failure, then yes, everything is groovy.

Phineas

That's not at all what I meant by 'okay!'

Candace

Do you know what this is?

Phineas

Uh, is it not a rabbit?

Candace

This is an actual living creature that uses carrots for food instead of science experiments.

Ferb

So why is he wearing a tutu?

Candace

He likes it! [to the rabbit] Don't worry, Mr. Cutie-Patootie, they're just jealous.

Phineas

[confused explaining Candace that the carrots in the backyard disappear) I turn around a half of minute and-Poof!- now they're gone!

Candace

Welcome to my world.

Phineas

[even more confused] Wow. That must be really annoying!

Excuse me, we have a delivery for Phineas Flynn.

Phineas

That's me.

We've got 18 cases of cucumbers right here.

Say, aren't you a little young to order all this?

Yes, yes, he is. [to Phineas] Sorry, Phineas, he's new.

Phineas

No problem, welcome to the job. Hey, where's Perry?

Phineas

I guess we don't have to go to the future after all.

Ferb

Some other time, perhaps?

Candace

I'm watching you!

Phineas

Hey, where's Perry?

Ferb

He's doing a special appearance on a musical clip show.

Phineas

Hmm... Well, good for him!

Baljeet

Making changes to my schedu—

Phineas

We're building a machine to make the biggest, most durable bubble ever!

Baljeet

Ugh! Right, nobody ever asks Baljeet what he is doing.

Phineas

[as the Mix 'n' Mingler machine goes to full speed and lifts off the ground] Sorry, folks. Prepare for emergency ejection! [pulls a cord, and he and all the other people are ejected from the machine as it flies away and parachutes emerge from their chairs] In hindsight, a simple ice cream cone might have been more effective.

Stacy

See?