Sean quotes from Nip/Tuck

Sean

We don't need you for this surgery, Quentin. Why don't you just go home?

Christian

Or why don't you head down to the docks? I hear there's a whole bunch of sailors just arrived with three-day passes.

Sean

Buy us? We are not for sale!

Christian

We are at this price. [Edit] This man eats paper planes and shits out space shuttles.

Christian

Think about it, Sean. Look at what your 70-hour work week did to Matt.

Sean

Your genes are as responsible for that as are my work habits.

Sean

Where is Christian?

Liz

I'm sure his spirits are here, but his body is still in the tanning booth.

Sean

I was in the neighborhood driving by and decided to see my partner. ...Why is there a statue of a cock in the living room?

Christian

It's abstract art, Sean.

Christian

They both have physical problems that need treating. What makes his face more deserving than her tits?

Sean

And you're just a goddamn Mother Teresa, Christian.

Sean

Christian, this is classic body dysmorphic disorder. Look at yourself at the mirror, you are a model of physical perfection.

Christian

I know, but I can be better. I know I can. Would you tell a millionaire to stop making money?!

Christian

There's an epidemic of obesity in this country and it's our job to exemplify a healthy alternative.

Sean

Passing on the Key Lime Pie or that second bottle of Merlot might be a more reasonable way to set an example.

Christian

Diet? [Edit] No, Sean. We're in the quick fix biz.

Sean

[referring to the ring he intends on giving to Julia] It's a little out of my range.

Christian

You banged the night nurse, Sean.

Sean

I'll take it.

Christian

Free surgeries are like sex without an orgasm.

Sean

Unless, of course, the patient's name is Blu Mondae, in which case the free surgery follows an orgasm.

Sean

Tell me what you don't like about yourself.

Christian

Just start at your head and work your way down.

Liz

I just want a little lipo and maybe some work around the eyes.

Christian

Oh yeah, that ought to do it.

Liz

Shut up, Christian.

Sean

Why haven't you asked me about Monica? What I did, why I did it.

Julia

I know why you did it. The same reason that I had an affair with Marlowe.

Sean

I want to talk about it.

Julia

I already know all the answers. So do you.

Christian

I've been wanting to talk to you since Faith's office. I lied about what happened in there.

Sean

I knew you didn't screw her over the desk!

Christian

No, that part's true. I mean about... What she said about the dream. About me having feelings for you. (pause) Not those kind of feelings. I never really thought I was gay. It was Faith who tried to convince me of that. I just think I have intimacy issues, y'know, with anybody in my life that...I love. I get confused and it's really hard for me to express myself. (pause) That sounded really gay, didn't it?

Sean

Yeah.

Christian

Yeah, well, screw you! Screw you! (there is a little joking play fighting between the men) Seriously, I love you.

Sean

I know. I love you too.

Michelle

But it isn't just about him, Sean. What about my baggage?

Sean

He can handle it.

Michelle

But I don't know if I can.

Sean

So you use him, let him help you. He's strong.

Sean

Are you a friend of Poppy's? You know, lesbian?

I've been known to dabble. But every now and then, Santa's helper enjoys a good North Pole, if you know what I mean!