Christian, this is classic body dysmorphic disorder. Look at yourself at the mirror, you are a model of physical perfection.
I know, but I can be better. I know I can. Would you tell a millionaire to stop making money?!
“Monica Wilder” · Season 4, Episode 3
In this episode: Christian Troy (7), Sean (2), Liz (2), Dr. Mike Hamoui (2)
There's an epidemic of obesity in this country and it's our job to exemplify a healthy alternative.
Passing on the Key Lime Pie or that second bottle of Merlot might be a more reasonable way to set an example.
Diet? [Edit] No, Sean. We're in the quick fix biz.
So you'll give your night nurse a nose job but you won't give your partner some lunchtime lipo?
How do you get that lineation in your abs there? I've been doing a thousand crunches a week and I can't seem to get mine to pop like that.
I have protein shakes for breakfast and lunch and a light dinner, and no refined sugars. And I'm in here every day.
How do you find the time?
Well, the hour you spend watching Sports Center, I'm in here. During your forty-five minute lunch at Joe Stone Crab, I'm jogging down the Strand. Gotta make the sacrifices.
Sacrifices? You're a goddamn physical terrorist.
With the amount of high-calorie choices available to consumers these days and the enormous portions restaurants are shoving in your face, surgery is the only solution for some people.
Standing proud with your fat-ternity brother, Christian? You can't hide behind those slimming scrubs anymore, Superchub. I saw the tape.
I don't think it's appropriate to discuss your new jerk-off material over surgery.
Oh, I didn't masturbate to your sex tape, Christian. I am not a chubby-chaser.
Oh yeah? Can you still find a cooch under that gunt? [turns to Michelle, who just entered the operationg room] Michelle, can you stop contaminating the sterile environment?
You can sing whatever song you want to in front of them (Sean and Christian), but I will not let your gay-shame cost me my job. You know, I thought having a woman run this place was gonna make a big difference, but with you it's all espresso machines and fresh carpeting, Michelle. I am still working for a dick!
Aren't your partner with Sean McNamara? How come he isn't doing this for you?
We are too busy to give in-house freebies.
[referring to Conor's birth] So he was born. He won't even remember it. [Edit] Call me when your kid needs stitches or learn how to tie a Windsor knot.
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