TonyWilliam Felton Russell, 5-time MVP, greatest basketball champion ever. He used to get so nervous, so pumped, he had to throw up before every game.
You have chosen to model your behavior after a man who vomited on a regular basis?
Tony
Nine titles in eleven seasons! Hall of Fame. One night, the Celtics take the court. It's a big game, huge. Red's watching them warm up from the sidelines, but something's not right. He can tell, not clicking. He clears the floor, takes them all back down to the locker room. Why? Because Russell didn't throw up. You know what Red says next?
[entering] "Get in there and puke, we've got a game to win."
ULUSN Lt. Deckard
It's classified.
Tony
Classified? What have you got in there? Aliens? Bigfoot? Ark of the Covenant? That only leaves one thing.
ZMZiva and McGee
[in unison] Unicorn!
ULUSN Lt. Deckard
What is your clearance?
Tony
About six-foot one-and-a-half. Why, have you got low ceilings? [shoots a picture of the guard]
ULUSN Lt. Deckard
[unimpressed by Tony's stalling tactics] Just get him out of here now, would you?
[passes by] Can't. Protocol.
Gotta wait for the medical examiner to release him.
[Ducky and Palmer's truck arrives at the scene.]
ULUSN Lt. Deckard
How many trucks you guys got?
Tony
Well, you've already met Widow Woman and Spider Mike here. [indicating Ziva and McGee] The Rubber Ducky makes it a great big convoy. (after a pause) See what I did there? Seamless transition from Convoy to Smokey and the Bandit.
[McGee is on the phone with Tony, concerned he's lost their signal]
Tony
Define 'lost', McGee. I know exactly where we are. We're between a tree and a bush, directly underneath the earth's sun.
Well you're not showing up on the map, let me restart the scan.
Tony
You might wanna hurry. Ziva's turning in circles; either the trail's gone cold, or she's about to mark her territory.
Tony
How can you work with someone for three years and not know they have a kid?
Just because you work with somebody everyday does not mean that you know *everything* about them.
Tony
Really? So I shouldn't know about that tattoo on the inside of your...
I MEANT, I understand someone wanting to keep their personal and professional lives seperate, as should you. It did not end very well, when you fell in love when you were undercover, did it?
Tony
...Thanks for the memory.
Red apples. That's good Amanda.
Tony
Breakfast is served, my lady a chocolate chip cookie [Amanda saying Thank you] and some hot cocoa.
Your aunt will be here soon to pick you up.
AAmanda
Thank you for helping me with my drawing, Ziva.
You are one brave little girl Amanda.
AAmanda
Where's Mi - Shi? [walking over to window] What happened to your hand?
[Gibbs hands Agent Lee's badge to Amanda] Mi-Shi would want you to have that.
[Tony has taken his picture on his computer]
I'm not even going to ask.
Allow me. [To Tony] What are you doing, Tony?
Tony
Best deep in thought face.
I guess there's a first time for everything.
Tony
[As the computer displays his picture] Nailed it. All right, Strawdog24. Beat this one. [Puts it on the webpage] Yeah, baby.
[Reading the website name] Ibeatyou.com. The place to compete online with anyone at anything.
Tony
Yeah. It's very fun. Very addictive. Look at this guy. Best air guitar. Look at that guy. Best "do the Hustle." [McGee walks back to his desk] I mean, you name it, they got it.
Tony
The Hustle. Saturday Night Fever? Travolta. [Mimics dancing in his chair]
[Laughs sarcastically] What is the point?
Tony
What is the point of any dance? It's about letting loose. It's, you know, having a good time.
I meant the web site, Tony.
Tony
It's... fun. It is... amusement. Light-hearted pleasure.
I know what you're doing. I know how to have fun, Tony.
Tony
Really? Do tell.
The Hustling and the deep thinking photos. Those are all just, you know. Child's play. Tell him, McGee. [Tony looks over in McGee's direction, as does Ziva. Both look at him oddly] McGee?
[Cut to McGee making a contorted face]
[on the same web site] Uh, I'm just working on my best psycho face here.
Tony
It's not bad, Probie. Just need to work a little bit more with the eyebrow. See what I'm saying? [Holds his hand in front of McGee as he continues making the contorted look] See how that reads? See that?
[With contorted face] Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Tony
That's what you want.
Would you two like some time alone together?
Tony
Look, everybody enjoys a good book, but don't you ever have the urge to just act a little...
Tony
Silly. Stupid. Brainless.
Tony
Exactly.
Tony, you and I come from two totally different places. In my world, you grow up. Fast. You have no choice.
Tony
Now you do.
Her name is Hannah, and she's asked me out to lunch, twice.
Tony
You? [blinks and considers]
Did your rocketship just take a nosedive?
Tony
No. It just landed on a different planet.
They haven't hurt McGee, have they?
We have not heard anything.
Tony
[holds evidence box] Got something for ya from Trimble's apartment, Abby. We need to figure all this stuff out before sunset.
Tony
Before the sun goes down.
[looks frustrated and sighs, grabbing the box and heads to table]
The sun sets at around 5:02. So, does that mean we have until five oh one?
That could be now. Not good enough! I can't take this. Every time you guys go out, and I never know if you're gonna make it back, [Tony and Ziva exchange a look as she mutters] and it's killing me. I can't sleep at night and I'm developing this sort of weird twitch.
Our work is sometimes dangerous, Abby.
Tony
Then you wouldn't see us at all.
[frowns] True. Still...sucks!
NCIS · 1,787 quotes
