Law & Order · Season 8
[about Van Buren's lawyer] Who's she, the new community affairs liaison?
[evasive] No. What do you have?
Come on, L.T. What's up?
Better you hear it from me. She's my lawyer. I was up for captain. One Police Plaza passed me over.
You're suing the department?
Title VII -- they promoted a white woman with the same score on the exam. I have the seniority.
I'm sorry we asked.
Who's the judge?
Sawyer.
The one who returned those 2 kids back to their crackhead mother?
Who later beat them to death. Yes, it's the same Sawyer.
Dale! Now, let's do this the easy way. All right? Just open the door, and come out nice and slow!
I can't.
We're not gonna hurt you.
I got no pants.
It's just us guys out here, Dale. Nothin' we haven't seen before.
Either I get my pants, or I don't come out.
[grabs Tagger's pants] All right, Dale. Here. Here. Look out the keyhole now. See? Here's your pants. Now, I'm tossin' 'em to ya.
[he drops the pants in front of the bathroom door]
All you have to do is reach out and grab 'em. Go ahead.
Okay. I'm openin' up the door.
[he opens the door; Curtis knocks the door into his head]
OW! No! Liar! I want my pants!
[takes him away] Why, Dale? I don't see anything here worth covering up.
I'm playing legal tiddy-winks with these punks. What I'd really like to do is take them out by Battery Park and hang them up by the scrotum.
Clarence Darrow had Leopold and Loeb. Who do we have?
Beavis and Butthead.
The Church protects murderers, the law says two people can fire the same bullet, and the victim's mother forgives her son's killers. You figure it out.
You don't think you could? Forgive them, I mean?
No.
Neither could I. What does that say about us?
[about Christina Talbert's pregnancy] How could a mother miss something like that?
Wait till your daughters grow up.
A baby's dead and no one's responsible.
No one was responsible when it was alive, either.
So what happened to the dog?
It's with my partner.
Where's your partner?
Lincoln Hospital. Paramedics couldn't pry the dog from his butt.
What kind of dog?
Chihuahua.
Let me know how they word the commendation.
It's like finding out Amelia Earhart flew to Bakersfield and hid out for fifty years.
I got over Pete Rose.
I got bent over a chair by Miss Ross before. Now I'm getting another tingling sensation in my butt. Why is that?
...wishful thinking?
Bail, Miss Ross?
$500,000 on the doctor, your honor, and status quo for Mr. Camacho.
I'm sorry. I still don't see why we're here.
People request the cases against Mr. Camacho and Dr. Cosgrove be consolidated.
On what grounds?
The People allege they both killed Nancy O'Neal.
What? Me and this gangster?!
Your Honor, Dr. Cosgrove is a respected surgeon…
Enough! Elias Camacho remains remanded. Bail is set for Donald Cosgrove at $500,000. Now, go yell at somebody else.
Governments are like elephants. They never forget.
Admit it, Mr. McCoy. We won.
You didn't win. The system you want to destroy did.
You ever pay for it, Lennie?
I was married, wasn't I?
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Law & Order pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
