U
3rd most-quoted character in Jackie Chan Adventures: in 178 of its 738 quotesJackie (105), Jade Clones (96), Mama Tohru (40)
Scenes with Uncle 159
M Mohajah
I must move closer. Read his mind...
[numb speaking] Here is your ticket, Jade.
It's so cool you're taking me along on this once in a lifetime educational experience, Uncle Jackie!
[Mohajah reads her mind]
JS Jade's Mind
Three whole days, no school! Yes!
[numb speaking; hugging Uncle] I'll miss you Uncle.
[Mohajah reads his mind]
JS Jackie's Mind
I'll miss you Uncle.
[numb speaking] And don't worry, I won't forget the curry powder.
U Uncle
You are a good nephew.
[Mohajah reads his mind]
Uncle's Mind Jackie will forget. He always forgets!
[Jackie is thrown into a market booth; his cellphone rings]
U Uncle
Ah, Jackie! Do not forget curry powder!
Okay Uncle, I took care of it. Have to go, bye! [Leaps up; to shopkeeper] Sorry about your shop, send me a bill, thank you! [Runs off]
Kinda. [looking at an old book depicting one of Jackie's ancestors] The ghost of Jackie.
[picking up the book] "The Hong Kong Kid".
U Uncle
Aiya! Do not scare Uncle like that!
Amazing! The picture looks just like me! This book must be about my great-great grandfather!
U Uncle
Fine, take home. Make good bedtime story.
Jade! You're supposed to be taking a tour of Paris.
Jade. Tch. You've obviously never been on the tour bus with Uncle.
[flashback to the tour bus]
U Uncle
You drive too fast! How can Uncle see the sights?! Slow down!
[bound by curtains] A curse upon my lighter side! He told the secret I would hide! [Uncle sprinkles him with salt, slowly transforming him to stone] Without him, you'd have never known that salt will turn me back to... [completely petrified]
[after Jackie is teleported to Uncle's Store]
U Uncle
Jackie! Did not expect you until tonight!
You and I both Uncle. I believe this necklace has magical powers.
Cool, can I check it out?
No Jade. This necklace could be very dangerous.
Everything is very dangerous! Traveling to Venice, digging for artifacts, wearing jewelry...
[cellphone rings] Is that you, Uncle?
U Uncle
No. It is a magazine salesman calling you at five o'clock in morning!
Oh, sorry. It's almost lunchtime here.
U Uncle
Uncle has been researching the Cat of Khartoum.
Yes, and did you discover any unusual legends or-
U Uncle
Getting to that! According to legend, anyone who gets scratched by claw of statue-
Becomes like a cat themself!
U Uncle
Bah! You already know so much! Why you bother me?
There is one thing I do not know, Uncle. What is the antidote?
U Uncle
Antidote?! Do not get scratched by claw of cat!
I mean, how do you reverse the process? Or are you getting to that?
U Uncle
No! Getting to bed! Call you back later!
The cargo ship was not a secure enough transport. The museum decided that with the thieves still at large, the Golden Dragon will instead travel to Hong Kong on the last place anyone would think to look; a cruise ship. I will accompany it.
Yes. The only problem is that the museum has given me a two room suite. I do not know what to do with all the extra space.
I'm going on a cruise! Yes!
Heh heh, all of us are going. Uncle, Tohru...
U Uncle
Pah! Uncle does not cruise. Uncle does inventory!
Uncle, when was the last time you took a real vacation?
U Uncle
Let me see. Three, four, carry the one, never! So why start now?
Where are you going, Uncle?
U Uncle
To lifeboat! Row back to shore!
Good! I have better things to do than hang around with junk seller! I visit with my boy, relax, play a little Mahjong...
U Uncle
[interested] You play Mahjong?
No, I win at Mahjong. Five-time All Kyoto Finalist!
U Uncle
Hong Kong Community Center Champion 1955. Beat you with one hand tied behind back!
Ha! Big talker! How about you put your tiles where your mouth is?
[loading up lifeboats]
S Ship Officer
We're near capacity, Captain!
S Ship Captain
Boats can and will accommodate every passenger and crewmember!
S Ship Officer
But we've never really had anyone... his size. [everyone looks at Tohru]
That boat, bobbing up and down? I will stay here.
If my baby not going, I'm not going. Bah. Take the Billy Goat!
U Uncle
Hah! Nice try! Could not leave ship until I whoop you at Shuffleboard! Take Jade!
U Uncle
Kindly forgive the brutish behavior of my apprentice. [takes away Tohru's Chinese Takeout food] He offers you his meal as an apology.
Oh, we would never eat his food.
U Uncle
You do not like moo shu?
U Uncle
[rolling out a mattress] Uncle is too old for this!
[rolling out a mattress] Tch. I'm too old for this!
[rolling out a mattress] Let's just try to make the best of- [mattresses are pulled out from under them] Oof!
[mattresses are stacked up for Tohru]
When the Chosen One sleeps well, everyone is rested!
[Uncle grabs Jade by her arm]
U Uncle
You are too young to watch battle with the forces of darkness!
U Uncle
Oh! Tohru! Uncle has the willies!
U Uncle
Dark Chi must be near!
U Uncle
Jade! [pulls her in and slams the door] You are still too young.
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These quotes come from Wikiquote's Jackie Chan Adventures pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License .
Jackie Chan Adventures · 738 quotes
