Gordon quotes from Hell's Kitchen

Chef Ramsay, I just fell with the whole rib in my hands so--

Oh, fuck's sake. The whole fucking thing?

The whole fucking thing. I'm sorry.

Oh, you're kidding me. Oh, come on. One simple task. (calls Monterray) Monterray.

Yes, chef?

Monterray, once you've finished the rib, serve the ribs to Krupa. (to Krupa) Hey, Butterfingers. When he's finished serving the ribs from the blue team, take the trolley. Do not drop it!

Yes, chef.

[checks Brendan's seabass] Oh, come on. Brendan, it's raw.

(to Brendan) COME ON, BRO! REALLY? (interview) Brendan, you suck! You suck!

Blue team, BLUE TEAM!

Yes, chef?

STOP! It's just got worse. Not one entrée has left together yet. NOT ONE! (Chino) You fucked me on the risotto! (Tommy) You screwed me on the duck and now I got a raw bass! What are you going to do now? Any suggestions? [the blue team doesn't answer] I've got one big suggestion! [points to every member of the Blue team] You, you, you, you, you, FUCK OFF OUT OF HERE! GET UPSTAIRS!

(interview) What the fuck, man? It is so frustrating, dude. It made us look like a bunch of little sissy-ass bitches, man.

(calls to the red team) Ladies?

Yes, chef?

I need four of you in here finishing the blue team. Any of you.

Yes, chef.

(interview) Having another person coming in to finish what I fucking started is the most infuriating slap in the face, literally "taking your dick out and whipping it across my chin" feeling that I have ever had in my life.

[angrily throws water bottle] FUCK!

I didn't sign up for this, bro. Send my ass home, bro.

Absolutely nothing came out right.

People just don't know how to fucking cook. (interview) That was, like, the biggest pussy bullshit I've ever experienced in my life, man. [to his teammates] I've never been kicked out of a kitchen, bro.

It's EMBARRASSING! [points at Brendan] HE CAN'T FUCKING COOK! [points at Chino] HE DIDN'T GET THE FUCKING RISOTTO OUT!

I didn't sign up for this! I signed up to win! We're all supposed to be professional chefs, right?

I AGREE!

RIGHT? SO, WHAT THE FUCK?

I'm not happy about it either.

You think you're pissed? I'm pissed too, all right? We just got our asses kicked in a big game.

I don't like to lose! This is the only thing I'm good at, bro! (interview) I did not come out of here to be made a fool of! That's too much for me! (in the dorms) No, this is some fucking - [kicks something] (to his teammates) Do you realize that they're all in our kitchen right now serving our guests?

Yeah.

We're getting whooped by a bunch of fucking chicks in there! (interview) We just got schooled, man! We should've had a fucking pen and a piece of paper. We should've been taking notes. We just got our asses fucking kicked, bro. (to his teammates) Like, come on, man!

Men, I'm - I'm disappointed. Will?

Yes, chef?

Who should leave Hell's Kitchen tonight?

100%, Brendan and Chino.

Paul, who should go?

Brendan and Chino.

Jonathon?

I voted for Brendan and Chino.

If you had to pick one?

I choose Chino.

Some of you guys are just a bunch of fucking phonies, you know that? All you do is scream what Chef Ramsay says, and when Chef Ramsay leaves, you just clam up. You don't–you don't wanna put yourself out there.

You can go fuck yourself, Chino.

You know why they're (Red Team) winning? You know why the girls are winning? They may not like each other, but they all fucking study their shit. I–I'm getting balled out on risotto. What do you do? You go at me.

I didn't see you jumping in trying to help somebody else like I was!

I couldn't! 'Cause I was getting fucked up! I was fucking up! How could I help somebody if I'm fucking up? [Gordon facepalms]

Team player? You ain't no team player!

Okay? I felt sorry for him, alright?

You don't even know what that means! Fuck you!

Guys!

Anyway, Brendan and Chino, step forward.

Where's the quesadilla?

[checks the quesadilla] It's burnt. It's chewy. [Returns to workstation] Ladies! LADIES! COME HERE, ALL OF YOU! Would you serve that, to your baby?

No, chef.

Unbelievable! [Sees Jamie wiping her face with kitchen napkins] Jamie, STOP SULKING LIKE A FUCKING BABY! The babies are out there, not in here! [slams the tray on the workstation] Start again!

Fucking shit!

Unbeliavable. (to the blue team) All of you, just stop! Look at me! LOOK AT ME!! [crowd sees what's happening in the kitchen while a baby cries] There's no chicken in here, and you think I'm going to push that out. You've got a small lead, but it's shrinking away! Start the table again!

Yes, chef!

They're overcooked and they're fucking dry. [returns to the workstation] Tommy, come here. Come here! I know they're children, right? I've got four of my own. [gets a piece of overcooked chicken] Would you serve them that shit?

No, chef.

What is that? It's-it's like a fucking baby's flip-flop! [throws the chicken away] Oh, piss off, will you?

Come on, quality product, Tommy!

Piss off.

Why do we have a kid's burger?

It's not even on the ticket.

Neither is the wellington.

[returns the entrées to the workstation] All of you, come here! It's the first freaking ticket of the night. Two bass, two New York strip, one lamb, one cod.

Fuck!

No burger, no wellington.

(interview) Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Your first ticket. Jennifer, THIS IS EMBARRASSING! Half the dining room is filled with children! PATHETIC!!

(interview) I'm mortified that I was even a part of this. I will not go down for Carrie. I should have just pushed her away and had her do something else.

Start again!!

Yes, chef!

(to Amanda) What's going, Amanda?

I'm sorry, chef?

WHAT'S GOING?

I have two bass on this ticket, chef, with the lamb.

And a cod.

And a cod?

And a cod.

The cod's not on?

The cod is not on, chef.

What?

I forgot about it.

Oh, my GOD!!

(interview) Amanda, is there anyone home?!

You haven't got the cod on?!

I forgot about it. (interview; laughs nervously) Ugh.

Family night?! Disaster night!

I'm sorry, chef.

How much time now?

We're waiting on the lamb.

Are you standing there with your hands on your hip while we're trying to put this ticket out?!

No, I'm not.

I better see you cooking something.

(interview) Elise is always yelling at me.

See what I mean?

I'm not going to let her get to me. I know I can cook. I know I'm good.

How long through on the window?

We have one more minute.

Please let's get it up.

Garnish, let's go! Here we go! 30seconds to the window!

Yes, chef.

Where's the bass?

It's coming up right now.

Service. Where's the lamb?

Right here, chef.

Let's go! Garnish please. [sees that the lamb was raw] Look at this. Ah, fuck me. It's raw! (returns to the workstation)

Is it still raw?

Come on.

You guys walking?

No, it's right there. She's got the other one.

You've got to be kidding me, guys!

[touches the raw lamb] Know that- that- okay.

STOP! [letting Carrie out of his way] Leave me alone! [sounding as if he might cry] All of you come here! Look at the fucking state of this!

I thought it looked good.

(interview) I honestly think that Carrie doesn't have all her marbles.

(to Carrie) Why are you doing this to me?

I saw this and I thought it was okay, chef -

"I saw this." It's not even hot, it's raw! RAW! [slams the lamb on the counter] SHIT! [throws the lamb away; calls Gina] Gina - please!

Yes, chef?

Take this... useless brigade... around every fricking table... and I want a sincere apology on the back of your crap performance! Piss off! Every one of them!

Why don't you explain to this table? Did you look all these children? They're all famished.

We sincerely apologize about your entrées. (interview) It was humiliating apologizing to the tables when I felt like it wasn't my fault.

We're very sorry.

We apologize.

We're sorry, we don't have any entrées right now.

[whispering] Wow!

(interview) Yes, we're a team, but you can only do so much when you have a broken leg.

[while returning to the red kitchen] Ladies, our promise it will not happen again, okay?

Ladies.

Yes, chef?

That was the first useful thing you have done tonight. It's also the last. Get out of here! All of you! [The Read Team leaves the kitchen] And hang your heads in shame! Because you absolutely suck! PISS OFF! Embarrassing! And on family night! YOU CERTAINLY DON'T CARE ABOUT THE CHILDREN!

Oh, my God.

"Shut it down!"

Jennifer, step forward, please.

Shit!

My next choice is... Carrie, step forward. (thinks on a third nominee) Do you know what? Amanda, join them.

Carrie, tell me why you think you should stay in Hell's Kitchen.

I love cooking. It is my passion, it's in my heart. I'm not ready to go yet, Chef. I want to prove you I am good enough.

Why is your team so desperate to see you out of here?

I don't know what Elise has against me. She's had something against me since day one. I'm not quite sure what it is.

It's not just Elise, Carrie.

Amanda.

Yes, chef.

Why do you think you should stay in Hell's Kitchen?

Well, Chef, unlike Carrie, I am not in denial that I had a fucking crap performance tonight in the kitchen.

Yeah.

Not in denial at all. I want this, Chef. I'm not going to fuck around and lie to you and say like, "Oh, you know, save me. You know, feel bad for me. I'm good." I can pr-I can fucking work my ass off for you, Chef. I can do better. You've seen me do better.

You didn't fight back!

Yes, Chef.

You threw the towel in!

I know, Chef.

Cod, bass!

Oh, Jesus Christ! Sea bass is fucking falling apart.

Sea bass is what?

Sea bass fell apart.

Oh, boy. Scott.

(Gives Monterray on a lesson) When you take the fish out of the pan, you leave it on the spatula.

It fell apart. There's nothing I can do. It fell apart.

You leave it on the fucking spatula! Is that what you did?

No, it's not.

No, you didn't. So it's the fish's fault again?

No, it's not. It fell apart. There's nothing I can do. It fell apart.

There IS something you can do, because you should be fucking responsible enough to CARE! YOU'RE GONNA FUCKIN' LIE TO MY FACE AND TELL ME THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN DO!

(interview) I understand what he's telling me and I'm listening to him, but you ain't going to keep fucking cussing at me. I don't give a fuck who you are: Chef Ramsay, Chef Scott, Chef Andi. You ain't going to keep talking to me like that!

So don't sit here and BULLSHIT me and tell me that there's nothing you can do!

I'm not bullshitting you. I put it on- I have it. I'm putting it on there-

You've given up! Get- BULLSHIT! SHUT UP!

And Monterray has decided to go toe-to-toe with Sous Chef Scott.

All you have to do is bring it up, and it won't break!

I understand. I understand.

DO YOU?! Then FUCKIN' DO IT!

I'm positive.

Then DO IT!

Then it's done then.

Fuck you!

Well fuck you too then! [throws pan into the sink] You fucking serious, dawg?

(interview) When you fucking got too much pride and you wanna stand there and fucking cuss at Chef Scott, that's the motherfucker that needs to go home.

Pass me some goose necks, please.

(interview) Yeah, just shut him down and send his ass home right now. That's a done deal.

What is that?

Cold too. Ice-cold.

CHINO!!

(interview; sighs)

All of you, come here! Just touch that. Touch the meat.[Blue Team touches the wellington] It's raw! RAW!!

Come on, we need to get it together!

Come on, guys!

[Picks up the sea bass] Behind you, hot. Coming through, coming through! Sea bass!

[Checks the sea bass with Sous-chef Andi] What's she done to that? [Calls Elise] Elise!

Yes, chef?

Come here. COME HERE! That's right! COME HERE! I've got one bass dry, and one bass raw. Raw! RAW!! Get the bass back in the pan!

Fuck!

(interview) Elise had some problems on the fish station. I mean, I thought Chef was about to kick her out of the kitchen. I was kinda hoping for him to, but you know... [shrugs]

Elise!

Yes, chef.

I don't know what kind of frame of mind you're in, but it's not on a fucking championship performance, let me tell you!

(interview) Elise will never admit that she's wrong. She just stood there with her eyebrows up and just looking. [pouts like Elise]

Who're you going to blame now?

Nobody, chef!

It's about time you looked at yourself in the mirror and took some responsibility!

Yes, chef.

(on the wellington) Look at that. Chewed up to fuck. (on the lamb) And that? That's raw.

Yep.

It's pink. [returns to the workstation and throws his spoon away] Blue team, STOP!! (to Chino) Come here you, look at that. [holds the undercooked lamb] That is raw. [points the lamb fat] That is white fat, [takes the destroyed wellington dough] and what have you done to this? Wha-wha-what is that? So now, you've just fucked [knocks his hand on the workstation, and the word "me" was never heard] me!!

Yes, chef. Yes, chef. (interview) I feel like a dumbass, moron, idiot because I can cook better than that. It's just... It's embarrassing.

There you go. [tosses the tray on the floor] All of you, FUCK OFF OUT OF HERE! GET UPSTAIRS!

[leaves the kitchen] I'm so fucking pissed, it's not even funny. (interview) We suck. The way I look at it is, any time you get a service shut down, you suck.

(to Janet Evans & Mark Spitz) My apologies. In the last service, they were good. That’s what hurts.

You gotta fight for it!

Exactly.

After shutting down the blue kitchen...

Now I want to serve the chef table one lamb, one bass.

Chef Ramsay looks to the red team to deliver entrees to both chef's tables

Oh, come on. [returns to workstation] Stop. All of you, come here. What is that?

It's raw, chef. I just sliced into it.

Oh, really? I'd never guessed. So in front of (Misty May-Treanor and Jen Kessy) these ladies here, this is how we want to perform? Raw bass, overcooked bass. Raw lamb, what an embarrassment.

Sorry, Chef.

Why are you doing this to me? It's like being in a volleyball match and I'm the ball getting pounded.

(interview) I was just like, Oh, my God. It was bad.

Let me tell you something really important: SHUT IT DOWN.

After shutting down both kitchens...

I'd rather send something.

Oui, chef.

Chef Ramsay has Sous Chefs Scott and Andi make the entrées for the chef's tables. And after a disastrous dinner service, [both Red team and Blue team gather in the kitchen while Chef Ramsay is in front of them] Chef Ramsay sums up the evening with one word:

PATHETIC. So therefore, the winning team tonight is... NOBODY. Both teams, think of two individuals that could really make your team stronger... by exiting. [pause] Get out of here.