Jesse St. James quotes from Glee

Jesse

Finn, I think it's the best if you sit this one out. Fact is that most the other guys here are better singers and Mike Chang, who can't even sing, can at least dance. You kind of? sing and dance like a zombie who has to poop.

Jesse

I took a class at UCLA in judging for reality-TV shows, so I'm totally ready to give feedback that's both blistering and unhelpful.

Jesse

Usually at this point, the reality show would go to commercial and we would take a five minute break to regroup and get touch ups done on our make-up so I'm going to hit the little boys room. [puts a hand on Mr. Schuester's shoulder] You're doing a great job, though. I really think you should comment more. Don't be shy!

Jesse

That's sweet. You remember the masculine click of my designer boots

Jesse

Do you want to know what happens in Vocal Adrenaline if someone dies during a number? They use them as a prop. Like Weekend at Bernie's.

Jesse St. James

Rachel, it's really fun to come home every now and again and coach a glee club or, in my case, help your mom use her grabber tool to pull a box of cereal off the top of the fridge, but you and I both know that you belong on Broadway. You need to get your ass back to New York.

Jesse St. James

Lionel Richie, uh? One of my favorites.

Rachel Berry

Oh, my God, you're Jesse St. James. You're in Vocal Adrenaline.

Jesse St. James

And you're Rachel Berry. I saw your performance in sectionals. Your rendition of Don't Rain On My Parade was flawed. You totally lacked Barbra's emotional depth. But you're talented. This is one of my favorite haunts. I like to come and flip through the celebrity biographies; pick up some lifestyle tips. I'm a senior now, so this year is kinda my victory lap. Snagging a fourth consecutive national championship would just be gravy. I'm getting out of Ohio soon. I've got a full ride to a little school called the University of California, Los Angeles. Maybe you've heard of it. It's in Los Angeles.

Jesse St. James

What do you say we take her for a spin?

Rachel Berry

Here? No-no, I'm kinda nervous.

Jesse St. James

I remember when I used to get nervous. C'mon. I do this all the time. I like to give impromptu concerts to the homeless. It's so important to give back.

Rachel

[at Carmel High auditorium to talk to Jesse, with a bright spotlight on her face) Who is there? I carry a rape whistle.

Jesse

[chuckling] Just me. [Rachel sighs] Most spots are 2500 watts, this one is ten times brighter. We have to wear sunscreen onstage, but it's worth it.

Rachel

Guess everything is bigger and brighter here. [Jesse chuckles and turns the spot off] I have to ask you something, and I need you to tell me the truth, otherwise there will be consequences - life and death consequences. Because if I give myself to you, and it turns out that you're just playing me, I might die. Okay, not literally, but emotionally. It'll be the kind of heartbreak that girls like me hold for the rest of their lives. Like Barbra in 'The Way They Were'.

Jesse

[laughing and holds Rachel] Oh my God.

Rachel

What?

Jesse

You're more of a drama queen than I am. [after a moment he holds out a hand to Rachel] Hi, I'm Jesse.

Rachel

I know who you are.

Jesse

You know Jesse St. James, the star of Vocal Adrenaline, your competition at Regionals. I wanna introduce you to Jesse - the guy who is nuts about you. The guy who would never hurt you.

Rachel

[sighing and holds Jesse] No one can know.

Jesse

I understand.

Jesse St. James

[to Rachel, who locked in the bathroom] Just come out so we can talk. Or sing about it.

Rachel Berry

Look, Jesse, I really like you, but I can't do it. It wouldn't be right for... the team.

Jesse St. James

What does the team have to do with this?

Rachel Berry

If I give myself to you knowing that my teammates wouldn't approve, it would be like I was sleeping with the enemy. I'd be betraying them. And because I'm truly not ready to do this, I'd be betraying myself.

Rachel Berry

[to Jesse] I don't understand why you're doing this.

Jesse St. James

Because when you love something, you gotta go for it. You would never be with me completely if I were on the opposing team. And I care about you more than winning another national title. So I left Vocal Adrenaline. For you.

Rachel

OK, Why don't we all take a moment to absorb what we've just watched.

Finn

This is garbage!

Will

Finn!

No, he's right. First of all, I need to trust my instincts more, because I had a feeling when we were shooting it that it was not going to be good.

Jesse

Why didn't you tell me they were in this, too? I thought you and I were going out! Being triple-cast with two other guys to play opposite your girlfriend - it's mortifying.

Rachel

It was an artistic statement.

Finn

No it wasn't! It was you trying to look like you had a bunch of guys fighting over you, so you could stop looking like some kind of outcast and be seen as some hot, slutty girl singer! (He walks up to her) How could you do this to me? To all us guys? Is your reputation more important than all your relationships? (Finn walks out, followed by Jesse)

Rachel

Jesse, wait!

Rachel

I came in first place.

Jesse

You were eight months old.

Rachel

I was very musically verbal.

Jesse

[watching Rachel] Hi.

Rachel

[stops dancing after seeing Jesse] Hi. How was your spring break?

Jesse

Good. It's good to be back. What were you just rehearsing?

Rachel

A guy came to glee club to talk to us about dreams. Luckily, I've known mine since I was four. I'm gonna play three parts in Broadway: Evita, 'Funny Girl' and Laurey in 'Oklahoma!'. I was just practicing her dream ballet with Curly. It's what I do when I'm feeling a little stressed.

Jesse

That's not a dream. A dream is something that fills up the emptiness inside. The one thing that you know if it came true all the hurt would go away. You singing 'Don't Cry For Me Argentina' in front of a sold-out crowd is not a fantasy. It's an inevitability.

Rachel

[hugging Jesse] I thought you'd never come back.

Jesse

And miss all your drama? Never.

Rachel

[As Jesse stands in front of her with an egg in his hand] Do it. Break it like you broke my heart.

Jesse

I loved you [breaks the egg in Rachel's hair].