What's Morris's problem?
SSam
Brain damage is the first thing that comes to mind.
S13 E4Parenthood
[to baby Joe] Can you say "Daddy is a butthead?"
Jane is like...
What's wrong with Jane? She's good.
No, Jane is creepy. I'm serious. She's always sneaking up on me. She's like those twins in The Shining.
[moments later, Pratt turns around and sees Jane smirking at him]
[Morris, who has a black eye and bruises on his face, accompanies a patient into the ER]
What the hell happened to you?
I was attacked by ninjas.
[looks at the patient] Who's this?
An obnoxious soccer dad... blunt head trauma, with LOC, breathing on his own. What's open?
Talk to me, Morris.
Nothing to talk about! The guy came at me, I defended myself. I'm patching him up.
Why'd he come at you?
Have you ever been to a kid's soccer game? [snatches the chart out of Pratt's hand dramatically and storms off] Parents are crazy!
Mrs. Draper is back for her 27th hospital admission status, post-pancreatic pseudocyst.
27?
Yes, somebody needs to tell her the hospital stopped giving out frequent-flier miles. Oh, and she's a chronic rectal discomfort, and you two get to work her up and review her old charts.
All 27?
No, why don't you just forget all about visits 6, 13, and uh, what do you think, 21? Yeah, that should keep it interesting. It'll be like playing patient roulette.
S13 E5Ames V. Kovac
Didn't you used to be ... ?
A paramedic? Yeah, now I'm an intern.
Next week he wants to be a cowboy.
Astronaut.
At the time of Mr. Ames's numbness, there were 47 patients in the ER, 82 in the waiting room. I was treating a young mother who was the victim of domestic violence, nearly beaten to death; an 8-year-old hit by a car; and a 53-year-old heart attack victim. There are always sicker patients in the ER, and it was reasonable to believe Mr. Ames's numbness could wait!
I just don't want to be one of those crazy obsessive mothers who phones their babysitter every hour.
Mine used to tie me to my high chair. [Abby gives him a look] I'm sure yours is much better.
[Abby begins to unbutton her shirt]
Wait, what are you doing?
I'm pumping. Sorry, my boobs are about to explode!
Gates is a knuckle-head who would defibrillate with a car battery and some jumper cables.
S13 E6Heart of the Matter
Women are weird.
No, Neela's weird. Indian and Brit, bad combination.
I move my hips!
Then move them over to admit.
Are you trying to irritate me?
Well, you make it so easy!
How's the weather, Frank?
Hurricane Up Yours is about to hit. What do you want? I'm filing.
I'm just making small talk. How's it going?
Am I being punk'd? You never wonder how I'm doing.
Dawn, meet Josie Weller.
JJosie
Delightful to meet you! I've been so looking forward to this day!
We're going to radiology, not Disneyland.
JJosie
Marvelous squared!
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