MeganUm, what are you doing this Saturday night?
Going to a concert at the Mega Dome.
'Cause we bought tickets.
[to Drake] Not you! [to Megan] Why do you wanna know what we're doing Saturday night?
Megan
I don't care what you're doing.
Megan
Or, maybe you, just asked yourselves! Yeah. Think about that... [Megan leaves their room smiling smugily]
Okay I wanna know what her deal is!
Yeah, yeah, yeah she's up to something!
Yeah, first she hangs up the phone, pretends to not be talking to anybody.
Yeah, and she measures our necks and asks of our social plans.
Wait, she said we asked ourselves about that.
Really, you're not a smart boy.
LLady
That's them, those 2 men from Ireland!
CCorey
These 2 freaks just tried to steal my popcorn and then sat on my girlfriend!
Ah, she's too young to be havin' a boyfriend!
Megan
Wait a minute... [rips off their fake beards] What are you boobs doing here?!
Megan
My idiot brothers.
[hears doorbell; talking about Helen and Lula] Walter, she's here.
Ooh. [walks before the front door]
Helen, with her grandmother.
[Drake, Josh, and Megan groan]
Hey! Can we have a better attitude about this? We're doing a nice thing for a sweet old lady. [Lula breaks the door in]
LLula
Where's the bathroom?!
Did you just break our door in?!
LLula
I rang the doorbell, I waited 25 seconds, nobody came, what was I supposed to do?
Maybe ring the bell again.
LLula
[to Helen] Who's that boy with a big head that looks like a tooth pick with a cantaloupe on top? [Megan laughs and Josh give her a furious look]
Megan
What, are we gonna pretend that wasn't funny?
Lula, that's Josh, he works with me at the Premeire. [introduces everyone else] That's Drake, I prefer him. That's Megan, Ms. Parker (Audrey), and this is...[forgets who Walter is]
And uh, what do we call you?
LLula
Lula. Where's the bathroom?
Right there through that door.
LLula
Well, thank you for finally giving me that information! [walks into bathroom and slams door]
Megan
I can't believe that lady is staying in our guest room for a week.
She's not, she's staying in your room.
Megan
What?!
You're gonna stay in the boys' room.
DJDrake, Josh and Megan
What?!
[to Drake and Josh] Your room is huge. The three of you will be fine for a week.
Megan
Aw, this is horrible.
Megan
Fine, I'll tell him. Josh, Molly thinks you're cute.
[Josh walks out of the room]
[Josh peeks his head back through the door]
Megan
[while playing with dominos at home] Great present, Walter. [Drake and Josh come home and confront her] What?
When we were in a helicopter alone, running out of fuel.
Megan
What's your point?
Until we were rescued by a tuna boat.
Megan
Did you bring me some tuna?
Come over here! [Megan screams as Audrey and Walter come home] Come here!
Megan
Mom, Walter, you're home, how nice.
Hey, Megan. So how was the water park?
[Vince doorbells and angrily arrives at Drake and Josh's house]
[Drake and Josh are shocked that Vince stopped by the house, much to their horror]
You blasted me out of my own helicopter.
DJDrake & Josh
Wha-- Shh!
Not in front of our parents.
[Josh whistles]
[to Audrey] I'll handle this. [he walks over to Vince] How can I help you?
Yes. [Vince angrily gives him a bill] What's this?
[angrily] A BILL. That's how much you owe me for my new helicopter.
What? [looks at the bill Vince gave him how much he needs to pay for his helicopter] $400,000?!
[Audrey and Megan are both shocked]
[as Walter] Boys, you're both grounded.
[as Walter] Grounded, 2 weeks.
[knowing the consequences, Drake and Josh ground themselves for 2 weeks as the episode ends]
Drake & Josh · 289 quotes
