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Corner Gas quotes

223 quotes · page 2 of 15

Corner Gas
All S1 S2 S3 S4 S5 S6

S1Pilates Twist

No fear. You know where I read that?

Where?

On the T-shirt of a kid working down at the co-op. He didn't let fear stand in his way. He stood there bravely bagging onions.

I don't even want to get into your pants.

And you're not going to with that kind of whining.

If I start a Pilates class, will you join?

That depends.

On what?

On what is Pilates?

Oh okay. Pilates is a method of unifying your mind and body...

You lost me.

Oh, come on Brent. Don't you wanna unify your mind and body?

No, I'm not gonna put all my eggs in one basket!

S1Oh Baby!

Do you have any books about child psychology?

AAlice

About what?

Child psychology.

AAlice

Chives on top of me?

Yes, that's right, Alice. I want a book about chives on top of you.

Hurts, don't it?

Why do they make cars out of metal? They should know that there’s a certain percentage of children that are evil.

S1Grad '68

Are you saying I'm that easy to distract?

Look Oscar, this spoon's dirty. [holds up spoon]

Really? [Oscar snatches the spoon and cleans it]

How much did it cost to get these pictures blown up?

'K, but look, the water tower's unmarked.

You got 'em dry mounted, that's like twenty bucks each.

Why would someone paint 'Grad 68' if it wasn't '68?

I don't know but if you figure that out you'll be halfway to I don't give a damn.

S1World’s Biggest Thing

Yeah, Brent. Why don't you look Fitzy's grandma in the eye and give her one good reason this town can't build a great big dirty hoe.

I didn't know whether to tell you this or not, but someone in town has a crush on me.

A crush...on you? You couldn't get a dog to lick you if you were covered in gravy.

What the hell are you talking about? Dogs lick me all the time.

So who's got a crush on you? Is Helen Keller back in town?

These quotes come from Wikiquote's Corner Gas pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.