Jeff quotes from Community

Annie

Get to the escape pods!

Britta

You really picked that outfit?

Annie

Britta!

Jeff

It's Meridian. Keep going.

Britta

Insane. And what is your name - "Exploitia"?

Annie

Scorpio Nine! I'm a pleasure droid! No, I'm an assassin?

Jeff

You're both. Keep going. She was a pleasure droid, she got turned into an assassin, she's now the daughter; that's your sister.

Annie

Get to the escape pods! And then we go! This way!

Abed

Check on Chief Star, Jeff.

Jeff

Chief Starr?

What?

Jeff

I'll see you in hell.

What?

Jeff

[gasps] Oh no, grifters! I better watch my French fries unless... [gasps] Counterfeit! Where'd you learn to do that?

Abed

We didn't learn anything. That class is-

Jeff

A ripoff? Hmm, what's another word for that?

Elroy

All he did was throw his hat and make us pass briefcases.

Abed

And he kept trying to sell us stuff. Briefcase swapping talcum for "grifter's palm", briefcase hinge oil for silence switcheroos, and something called extra-believable socks. Those are actually half-off; I kind of feel like I grifted him.

Jeff

So, in a sense, what happened is you took a class about grifting. And...

Annie

Jeff, do you really need us to say it? You were-

Jeff

Eh, whoa, whoa! Yeah, I need you to say it. Let me just get settled. Okay, go.

Annie

You were right.

Jeff

[tenses up in pleasure] Yeah... Well, you live and you learn, guys. Well, you live anyway.

Frankie

...And that solves the matter of the giant hand. If there's no other business-

Dean Pelton

Oh, there's some business.

Abed

Yeah, there's business. When we tie the hand to the roof, we'd like you to use extra thick straps, please.

Dean Pelton

Extra thick.

Abed

Extra thick straps!

Dean Pelton

Reinforced.

Jeff

Alright, meeting adjourned. Great. [gets stunned by Dean Pelton's taser] AAGH!

[chanting while dancing] Extra thick straps! Extra thick straps! Extra thick straps! Extra thick straps!

Jeff

I love that I got to be with you guys.

Gay.

Jeff

You saved my life, and changed it forever.

Gayyyy!

Jeff

Thank you.

[sobbing] I'm gay... I'm for real gay... I'M LEGIT GAY...!