Sarah Walker quotes from Chuck

Sarah

Come any closer and I shoot!

Casey

...You shoot him, I shoot you, I leave both your bodies here and go out for a late night snack. I'm thinking maybe pancakes.

Sarah

Chuck, those pictures that you saw were encoded with secrets, government secrets. If you saw them, then you know them.

Chuck

There were thousands of them.

Casey

Wait a minute. You're telling me all of our secrets are in his head?

Sarah

Chuck is the computer.

Chuck

[regarding the pictures of dead people] Why are these people sleeping?

Casey

They're not sleeping.

Sarah

They were killed, Chuck, and we wanna know why.

Chuck

[putting the pictures down] I have no idea.

Casey

Well, look again.

Chuck

I would rather not. It's kind of creepy.

Chuck

My life took a little detour senior year when our old friend Bryce Larkin discovered stolen tests under my bed and was kind enough to alert administration.

Sarah

Did you steal the tests?

Chuck

I thought it was kind of implied that I'm a decent person!

Sarah

Well, we all make mistakes.

Chuck

And I've made plenty; that just wasn't one of them. But, hey, then Bryce sent me a whole database of government secrets that are now locked in my brain, keeping me in a constant state of fear, danger, and anxiety, sooo...I'd say we're even.

Chuck

I count six SVB54 explosion protected security cameras with infrared surveillance.

Sarah

Did you have a flash?

Chuck

No, they sell them at the Spy Shop in the Buy More plaza.

Sarah

Stay in the car.

Chuck

My four favorite words.

Chuck

So listen, I've been thinking a lot about last night. And you know, you guys were talking about how this spy could be...valuable to us. So I was thinking what if we could convince her to, I don't know, like give up...some secret stuff or...

Sarah

You mean defect?

Chuck

Defect, yes! People do that kind of thing all the time, right? The Hunt for Red October...uh...White Nights. [after Casey stares blankly at him] White Nights? Gregory Hines...Baryshnikov...dancing their way to freedom?

Casey

[sarcastically] Well, as long as you've done serious research on the subject. You get her to defect, I'll help rescuing her brother personally.

Sarah

Why are you bringing this up?

Chuck

Well, she sorta, uh, just...called me.

Casey

She called you? Where?

Chuck

At the Buy More. And I think she might been in the store too, because she knew my every move. She even knew that I had mustard on my tie.

[preparing to rescue Mei-Ling's brother] Good, every warm body helps.

Chuck

I'm sorry, wha-me? No, no, no, no. Look as much as I wish that I could help you, I can't. I made plans with my sister. They are non-negotiable.

Chuck

But of course, I know that you wouldn't be in this mess if it weren't for me. I want to be with my sister and you obviously really want to be with your brother. We're like one big wacky transatlantic family.

Chuck

I owe you. I'm in.

Sarah

Okay fine, but you don't leave the van under any circumstances.

Chuck

I just need to be home by eight. If that's at all possible.

Sarah

It says here the crossbow is his weapon of choice.

Chuck

Oh, what, slingshot's too ineffective?

Sarah

Chuck's not wrong very often.

Casey

But he's annoying all the time.

Ellie

I have known him since the day he was born (obviously)!

Ellie

When people asked him what he wanted to be when he grew up, he would always say the same thing..."big boy." How cute is that?

Chuck

Ellie, you're killin' me here.

Ellie

And now he is a big boy. And I can tell that he is, because he is with a big...[looks at Sarah's chest] BIG girl.

Awesome

Sorry, guys. Don't mean to muck up your mojo. [to Chuck] I tried to stop her.

Chuck

Is she drunk?

Ellie

Chuck, you need a haircut. It's starting to make funny animal shapes.

Awesome

Let's go, babe; these two need their privacy. Huh?

Ellie

When you were seven, I told you that the burglar stole the money from your piggy bank? That was a lie, it was me. At the time I felt it was very important to have a New Kids fanny pack.

Sarah

Ellie, are you okay? Have you done anything out of the ordinary?

Ellie

...Words taste like peaches.

Sarah

[about the antidote] Here!

Chuck

No, no it's for Ellie.

Sarah

No, I'm sorry, Chuck, there's no debate. It has to be you. You're the Intersect.

Chuck

I won't take it knowing that Ellie will die without it; that both of you have been poisoned too!

Casey

You're a good person, Chuck, and I respect that, but I have a job to do, so take it before I shove it down your throat!

Chuck

Okay, okay. Fine, fine I'll do it.

Sarah

Thank you.

Sarah

It's the poison. It makes you tell the truth!

Casey

You do that, I'll give chase, put a gun to your head, threaten to pull the trigger if you don't take it!

Chuck

Would you really shoot me?

Casey

No.

Chuck

Yeah, don't waste a bullet, we're already dead!

Sarah

I am so sorry about all of this.

Chuck

That's okay, it's okay. It's not ideal but I've lived a pretty good life. I mean, how many guys can say they landed a helicopter and saved the lives of innocent people?

Casey

Courageous and honorable members of the United States military.

Chuck

Okay. Okay, Intersect: flash! Show me how to do this.

Sarah

Did you flash?

Chuck

No, nothing. C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon baby, don't fail me now, c'mon.

Sarah

Okay Chuck, that's enough. Run; I'm gonna try and stay and defuse it.

Chuck

No, I'm not leaving you here.

Sarah

Go, that is an order.

Chuck

[Indignant] No.

Sarah

I said go!

Chuck

Oh, I see, so you're gonna shoot me to prevent me from being blown up; that's a great plan.

Sarah

Why are you so stubborn?

Chuck

Actually, I consider this a rare moment of courage. I don't know where it's coming from; I guess you just bring out the worst in me.

Sarah

And you in me.

Chuck

It was nice knowing ya.

Sarah

[out of breath] Well, the good news is we're alive and the bad news is that this is kind of an uncomfortable moment right now.

Chuck

This is completely comfortable on my end...just saying.

Sarah

Look Chuck, I been thinking about our breakup and I’m not sure it’s the best idea.

Chuck

Miss me already, huh?

Sarah

Well, you know, for the cover. It makes things easier.

Chuck

Well I guess your job just got a little bit harder.

Sarah

Look, I’m sorry you thought there was something between us. It’s very common in these situations to perceive a connection that isn’t there.

Chuck

Of course I get it. It’s the old story, you know, guy gets supercomputer in his brain, beautiful CIA agent is sent to protect him and then she tells him while under the spell of a truth serum she’s not interested. I get it. But for me the emotional roller coaster is a little much so I think I would rather find something a little less common, like say I don’t know, a real relationship.

Sarah

Okay, Chuck if that's what you want then I’m going to have to sell it. [Sarah starts crying]

Chuck

You okay? [Sarah leaves and is spotted by Jeff and Lester]

Jeff

Heart breaker.

Lester

Dream maker.

Jeff

Love taker.

Lester

Don't you mess around with Chuck.