Edward quotes from Camp Lazlo

Edward

This friend stuff is harder than I thought.

Edward

This stinks. I don't need you, Beaver. I don't need friends.

Edward

It feels good to wash this day away. All those acts of kindness and compassion. They went against everything I've ever stood for. I feel like my soul's been hacked from my body and trampled.

Edward

If you two are finished yapping, I'd like to have my sandwich now.

Ping-Pong

Sure thing. Edward ordered the salami sandwich; [hands a salami sandwich to Edward] hold the mayo. Dave ordered the ham and pea soup; [hands a bowl of ham and pea soup to Dave] hold the ham and peas. And I ordered the snake. [eyes widen] I ordered the snake?!

[look inside the basket] THE SNAKE! [scream]

Lazlo

[hearing their screaming from the distance] What was that?

Raj

I don't even know, but it reminded me of a movie about a melon that ate farmers.

Skip

I can't see a gosh darn thing out of these goggles, can you see anything, Chip?

Edward

Do you imbeciles really need to be wearing your goggles before you get in the water?

Chip

I don't know, but I have my floaties!

Samson

That way!

Edward

That way!

Samson

That way!

Edward

That way!

Samson

That way.

Edward

That way. [looks at his finger] You're probably right. It was that way.

Edward

Come on, Bean Scouts, we're not going to let a bunch of squirrels push us around. [gets grabbed by an angry Honey, who's preparing to attack him]

Raj

[to Nina] Do not listen to him! He does not speak for the rest of us! [Nina savagely grabs him by the neckerchief and starts strangling him] LAZLO!

Edward

Boy I'd give the shirt off my back to see those losers in harms way. [Chip rips off Edward's shirt] Hey! What's the idea?!

Chip

See? [points the trio hanging over the waterfall]

Edward

[excitedly rips his pants off] Here, take my pants, too!

Edward

[after seeing Lazlo, Raj and Clam falling down the waterfall] Hooray! [seeing the trio coming out of the water] Whatever.

Hooray!

Edward

[grabs his shirt] Gimme my shirt back. [walks off]

Chip

[to Skip] Is he gonna take his pants back too?

Edward

Here comes the prediction, campers! [looks inside the wig with words that say...; thinking] "Edward will smile for Lazlo?" Will smile...for Lazlo?

Skip

What does it say?

Samson

Yeah. [gets knocked over on his side by a throwing volleyball] Tell us what the prediction is.

Edward

[as his grin turns to a frown] Um...Nothing. Madame Lazlo is a fraud, a fake. You should all forget the whole thing ever happened. My face hurts.

Lazlo

Well, how did it go?

Edward

Did you chicken out?

I can't go to Slugfest. I'm just too busy.

Edward

He chickened out.

Lazlo, I am not going anywhere.

Edward

You'd expect me to eat a plate of plain mustard?

Clam

It has zing.

Edward

Here's your zing.

Lazlo

[to the campers who want hot dogs] Well, we really appreciate it. But we have something more important to deal with right now: friendship.

[touched] Aw!

Edward

Yeah, but we can't eat friendship.

Lumpus

Pass the marshmallows please, Alvin.

Edward

Edward.

Lazlo

Hey, Edward! How was your movie night?

Edward

[mimicking Lazlo] "How was your movie night?" How was my movie night?! I'll tell you how it was! Can I tell you how I loathed it?! How I would have preferred sitting in a cow's stomach, watching grass being digested?!

Lazlo

Okay, maybe later!