Slinkman quotes from Camp Lazlo

[saw Lumpus reflection at the rock] Oh my gosh. I've...I've become Lumpus.

[talking about a great scout] That was back when beans were beans. Way back...last week.

The jig us up, Samson! Milt told me everything.

♪ Go-cart races sing this song, do-da, do-da. ♪

Raj

♪ Oh-a-do-da-day. ♪

Lazlo

♪ Oh-a-do-da-day. ♪

Clam

♪ Da-day. ♪

♪ Go-cart races sing this song, oh-do-da... ♪

Lumpus

[fed up with the Campers' singing] Will you can it with the singing?! [The Campers stopped after that]

Sir, they're just excited about building their own go-carts for the big annual race.

Lazlo

[tries to sing] G-G-Go-cart.

[as shadow puppet Lumpus] Grumble, grumble, I'm very annoyed. Slinkman! Slinkman!

Lazlo

[laughs] I love this part!

[as shadow puppet Slinkman] Reporting for duty, sir. [as shadow puppet Lumpus] I thought I told you to order the Jelly Beans lights out! [as shadow puppet Slinkman] I did sir, but they were scheduled for a shadow puppet show tonight. [as shadow puppet Lumpus, who clears throat]

Lumpus

[walks into Jelly Bean Cabin] Slinkman! Slinkman!

Reporting for duty, sir.

Lumpus

I thought I told you to order the Jelly Beans lights out!

I did sir, but they were scheduled for a shadow puppet show tonight.

Yay!

Lumpus

Attention, campers! Attention, campers! Five minutes until the start of the big...Buddy Day...swim finale. So, grab your...buddy and have a...good race! Yeah.

Lazlo

[delirious due to large amounts of blood being sucked from him by the leech] Oygawoygasoyoocha...gotta get to the lake...big RACE!

Lumpus

Slinkman, who is that scout?

Uh...Lazlo, Sir.

Lumpus

No, no, no...the fat one!

Uh...that's a leech, Sir. A sea lamprey, actually.

Lumpus

Oh...a sea lamprey? Well, see that Mr. Lamprey gets a uniform, will you?

Yes, Sir.

Uh, Sir, since it's the final one of its kind maybe you might not wanna chop the...

Lumpus

Slinkman, if you don't help me with this, I'll take away Mr. Squishy again.

Lumpus

That's it!

What's it?

Lumpus

This is my ticket outta here! I can finally say good bye to Camp Kidney... [changes the map of Camp Kidney to a world map] And hello to the world! All I have to do is find that one genius. I wonder who it is? [watches Clam outside from a window]

Clam

Apples! [bangs his head against the tree]

Lumpus

Well, we know who it's not.

Is everything okay, sir?

Lumpus

Yeah, we're good. [pushes the scouts to the exit] Let's go, let's go, let's go.

But, sir, you're forgetting...

[to the customer] You call that a tip?! [saws the table in half with the chainsaw]

Lazlo

Well, how did it go?

Edward

Did you chicken out?

I can't go to Slugfest. I'm just too busy.

Edward

He chickened out.

Lazlo, I am not going anywhere.

Sir, we have a little problem.

Lumpus

Yeah, I know! Who let a monkey in the projector room?

Lumpus

What about the Dung Beetles? What did they get?

Ugh, [quivers] ...you don't want to know, sir.

Lumpus

What badge am I missing?

The Handy Helper badge.

Lumpus

And that means to earn that badge, I'll have to ...

Help someone.

Lumpus

Help someone?! [screams] NO!

What are you doing, sir?

Lumpus

I'm simply too valuable to waste away at this miserable excuse for a camp. The real world needs someone with my can-do spirit, my intellect.

But, sir, why leave when you could just stay, earn your badge, and be done with it?

Lumpus

Because the man know the real world doesn't need badges or Grand Legume, Slinkman.

Lumpus

Goodbye, Camp Kidney, you old pile of logs. Real world, here I- [runs over by a truck]

Sir!

Lumpus

Just one of the hazards of the real world, Slinkman. Here, a man must pick himself up and- [runs over by an ice cream truck]

Sir, it wouldn't be easier to just earn the badge?

Lumpus

Easier? Yes, Slinkman, but not a man in the real world would do. [runs over by a car]

Yes, but I wonder if you were cut out for the real world, sir.

Lumpus

Cut out for it? Why, tailor made is more like- [runs over by a moped] Ow! That one actually hurt a little.

Please, reconsider, sir. But... [looks back as Lumpus was run over by objects from the real world]

Lumpus

[after getting hit multiple times] Slinkman.

Sir?

Lumpus

Okay, who I gotta help?

Edward

[to Slinkman] How am I gonna explain this to my mother?!

Well, there is a way, but it is very difficult.

Edward

Everything with mother is difficult.