Tina Belcher quotes from Bob's Burgers

Gene

Where are our kids' projects? We can't find them.

Mr. Frond

Oh...they're um...they're over there.

Tina

You didn't point at anything. When you say "over there," you kind of have to point at something.

Tina

Rumor has it this party will be packed with Beef-ohs.

Bob

What are "Beef-ohs"?

Tina

B-F-O-S; "Boys From Other Schools".

Bob

What's wrong with the boys from your school?

Tina

I need fresh faces. And fresh butts.

Gene

You'll take the butts you're given and you'll like it!

Louise

Tina, did some guy just swindle you out of your toy horse?

Tina

What? No! I mean, kind of. Why would you say that?

Louise

(pointing at Bronconius) He just said it!

Linda

Wha, who, wha, what's goin' on, wha?

Louise

Tina got swindled!

Linda

Ohmygod, ohmygod, ohmygod!

Gene

AAAHHHH! I told you we should have never left the food court!

Tina

Look at what you've all become. You've betrayed the meaning of the Equestranauts. And I don't mean the sexually-charged, awkward, confusing vibe at this party. I'm a fan of sexually-charged, awkward, confusing things too. Like, for instance--

Bob

[frowning] Tina.

Tina

Sorry. But being an "Equesticle" means no judgment... right, Horseplay? I mean, you accepted me, and I don't even have testicles. Bronconius hijacked this thing you all love and tainted it. He's the real Xandar.

Bob

I know who that is - he's the bad guy.

(sniff) Gross! (sniff) Great! (sniff) Gross! (sniff) Great!

Louise

I can't stop smelling this enigma of gross-great!

Gene

Is that what sex will be like?

Tammy

Where's Tina? At home, crying into her butt?

Tina

No. My butt is dry. And strong.

Bob

Oh, right! Because that's what Thanksgiving is all about—running around with a bunch of stupid birds and going on rides. Fine, go. But you know what? I am not making dinner!

Tina

He's handling this pretty well.

Bob

No, you're crying!

Louise

Your name is a verb in this family. We call it "Geneing out."

Gene

I thought that meant taking off your pants after a good meal.

I was "Geneing out" at work the other day.

Hugo

[swerving the pedi-cab back and forth] I'm "Geneing out" right now!

Gene

Oh my God. I'm a verb. I'm a bad verb!

Tina

You're a "berb."

Gene

I'm a "berb!"

Zeke

Why do you wanna be a hall monitor so bad anyway? It's just tellin' on kids!

Tina

No! It's..."helping" on kids.

Tina

Mom and Dad might not recognize us when we get back from go-karting. (pulling her hair back) 'Cause our hair will be like this!

Louise

(pulling on her face) And our faces will be like this!

Gene

And our penises will be like this! (pause) You can't see what I'm doing, but it's pretty great!

Louise

I'm coming for you, T. If I finish the season in first place in B-League, I get a spot in the Kingshead Island Grand Prix!

Tina

But you actually have to win races to finish in first place. Maybe you didn't fully understand that?

Louise

Oh, ho-ho-ho, keep it up, Tina!

Tina

Way ahead of you. Literally.

Tina

I've never been to this neighborhood before. Looks like a bunch of old people live here.

Bob

See, it's already getting good! Old people are scary.

Louise

Being an old person is scary.

Linda

(offended) Hey!

Bob

It is.

Louise

Okay, let's see what the old kooks have cooked up.

Gene

I hope it's not Dad in sandals.

Tina

Yeah, his toes are a nightmare!

Gene

Who's that girl? She's not a Boy 4 Now!

Tina

She won an essay contest. It had to be under 30,000 words and I couldn't cut mine down.

Louise

Yeah, that's rough. (She sees Boo-Boo) There's that idiot Boo-Boo. It was his dumb birthday last week. Not that I care, or even know that.

Gene

Allen does not make a believable mummy.

Linda

Wait, is that a different Allen from the last video?

Tina

No.

Linda

Yes, it is! They switch Allens sometimes, Bobby.

Tina

(getting annoyed) No. They don't.

Bob

Don't tell Teddy. That's his favorite one. He's a big Allen guy.

Tina

I think that's supposed to be Aunt Gayle.

Gene

Well then who's that lady in the living room?