Slappy[to the serpent] You remind me of a very young Scrappy-Doo.
Played by Sherri Stoner
Animaniacs · 261 quotes
4th most-quoted character in Animaniacs: in 45 of its 261 quotes
Most scenes with: Skippy (26), Dover Boys (7), Yakko (6)
Lines by Slappy 3
SlappySlappyThe back door. Gee. I wonder who that might be.
[First lines]
SlappyBoo! [walks home] Comedy rule number 26: Surprise your audience! Heh. Now, there’s edutainment for ya. [opens the door] My job is done!
S5 E7 The Carpool/Sunshine Squirrels
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Scenes with Slappy 42
YWYakko, Wakko and Dot
[singing] The crankiest of creatures in the whole wide world. Our next cartoon features Slappy the Squirrel!
Slappy[opens the door] Enough with the singin' already![closes the door.]
[singing] That's Slappy!
[A wide shot of Slappy's Treedome and a mailbox is shown in Burbank, California. Inside Slappy was sitting on a chair, watching TV. The TV zooms in to reveal a construction site and a sign that reads, SPIKE CONSTRUCTION. A young Slappy wearing a construction hat, skipping on a construction building. She holds a bucket of RED HOLT BOLTS. She throws a red bolt of the site, then gets a hammer and pounds it]
Young Slappy[scatting "Working on the Railroad"] Dah da Dee Da de da dee dee, duh de duh da dah!
[A Big Bad Wolf, wearing red overalls, peeks out of the site. He pulls his overalls revealing some high heels and Walks over. He imagines Slappy as a turkey and a sign that reads, SQUIRREL RUMP ROAST. The wolf licks his jaws and gets a fork and spoon out of his pockets. Slappy holds the bucket of RED HOT BOLTS. The wolf tries to eat Slappy, but she throws red hot metals into his mouth. He holds his neck and fire burns his head. Slappy hits the wolf with the hammer. The wolf spin and falls very far and pops up to his regular self and his eyes bugle out]
SlappyWild take number 32. Hah ha. Regular as clockwork. [burps] Wish everything was regular as clockwork.
[The wolf hits the ground, turns into 3 babies, which cry.]
Young SlappyIf there's one thing that I hate,
SYSlappy and Young Slappy
It's a crybaby. [laugh]
[The first Slappy coughs and spits, while the second Slappy holds a sign that reads, THE END]
Young SlappyNow that's com-
[But the commercial changes the channel and a box that reads TOTALLY AWESOME ACME SNAX and Three turtles come out of the box wearing hats and they have canes]
CCCereal commercial, singing
Totally awesome Acme Snax, they are fun and energy packed, sugar coated sugar sacs.
SlappyEh, stop it. [throws the remote at the TV lying down] Flipping network cuts out my famous end line for some razza-flavin' crudball commercial there. [a knock on the door] Ehh, somebody get me a peen-ball hammer. [walks to the door and opens it] Who is it?!
SSSkippy Squirrel
[glomps on his aunt into her house] Aunt Slappy!
[The screen pans to Skippy sitting on Slappy's tummy]
Slappy[to the camera] What can I do? He's my nephew. Hello, Skippy.
Hi! [hopping up and down] What happened to your TV set?
SlappyIt's having a bad day. Pardon me, but you've got a little excess energy there Skippy.
Must be these totally awesome ACME Snax. Want some?
Slappy[takes out a piece of ACME Snax] Now there's a color-founding nature. [eats it, then makes silly faces, blows like a whistle, shoots out of the tree like a rocket, and tumbles down the stairs]
Neat, huh?
[Slappy goes to the kitchen, pours a whole lot of ACME Snax into the sink drain, and shreds them, causing the drain to gross out in disgust. Skippy looks up to his aunt innocently]
Slappy[pats Skippy's head] Ah, no wonder you watched that Bonkers show. That junk food's rotten your brain here.
[hopping up and down again] What'cha looking for?
SlappyI'm gonna make you some brain food. That's right, I'm gonna make you my famous walnut fig dough surprise.
What's the surprise?
Slappy[deadpan] I'm outta walnuts. Let's go visit Doug the Dog. [Skippy stops hopping in fear] We'll get his walnuts out of his old walnut tree.
Doug the Dog?! But he hates you, Aunt Slappy! He's been trying to eat you for years!
Slappy[to the audience] Thank you, Mr. Exposition.
SlappyLook, you've seen all my old cartoons, right?
About a trillion times!
SlappyI've wrestled with Walter Wolf, Sid the Squid, and Beanie the Brain-Dead Bison. This Doug guy here is nothin'.
Yeah, but those were cartoons and this is real life.
Slappy[to the audience] Don't tell him, he might crack. Look, Skippy. I've seen and done every trick in the book- [Skippy sees a large dog looming behind her] Hold it there. You're doing the old "Frozen Take" bit, which means Doug the Dog... [pulls a club out of her purse and clonks Doug without looking] ...was right behind me. Heh-heh-heh!
That's just like in Prehistoric Slappy!
SlappyThat was Cave Girl Slappy 1932 directed by Pizz Peeners. Eh, but let's not be anal. Let's get some walnuts. [walks up to the walnut tree with Skippy. Doug lunges at her] Hold it! [Doug freezes; spins around] Enchiritos! Get your enchiritos here! Enchiritos, mister? [Doug takes out money with a rapid nod] Ah, you're my kind of a guy who like them extra hot! [pulls out an enchirito, revealing a dynamite, wiggles her eyebrows twice to the audience, and hands it to Doug] Here ya go, amigo. [takes the money and walks off. Doug bites the enchirito, but noticed the dynamite too late, and it explodes in front of his face, leaving his teeth fall off] What a schmutz. [picks up his teeth, and hands them to Skippy] Here. Put them under your pillow tonight. Maybe you'll get some dimes.
Great! [follows his aunt]
[A dazed Doug hits the ground with a thud]
JPJack Palance
Hey, Slappy, did you ever see this? [does a one-armed pushup like he did at the Oscars]
SlappySave it for the Jack LaLanne story, bubele! [to Luke Perry ] Y'know, you remind me of a very mature Jonny Quest.
[Bumbie's Mom gets shot, causing Skippy to drop his popcorn]
BBumbie
Mommy?
[starts to tear up] Bumbie's Mommy... [cries]
Slappy[surprised out of her nap] Pat, I'd like to buy a vowel! [she then stares at the crying Skippy]
[crying] Bumbie's Mommy!
SlappyCalm down kiddo, it's just a movie. She's not really...
Dead, she's dead. Bumbie's an orphan! [resumes his loud sobbing]
WWalrus Lady
[annoyed, tapping on Slappy's shoulder] WHAT is that child's problem?!
SlappyMe! And in about 2 seconds, you're gonna share that problem.
LLady
Well! I never!
SlappyWell, you should. It's fun. [pushes the walrus lady back into her seat and sits down herself. Skippy looks up and lets out a weepy gasp in horror as the background changes red. A terrifying forest fire has started in the movie, and Skippy moans and cries in fear now] What do you say we get some air, eh?
[Skippy lets out another scared sob]
BBumbie
[prances through the wildfire in fear] Mommy?
[Skippy bawls loudly at this. Slappy picks him up and starts carrying him out of the theater. The walrus lady is about to say something]
SlappySay one word and I'll throw dynamite down your pants!
SlappyWe're going to Tumcumcari, New Mexico.
SlappyWhy?
SlappyTo meet Bumbie's Mom.
Bumbie's Mom? She's... [cries loudly and grossly]
Slappy[to the camera] Pavlov would love this kid.
Would you like anything?
SlappyPerhaps a sedative?
Huh? I don't get it.
SlappyGo away. [Hello Nurse shrugs and begins to walk off in a sultry manner. A suitcase drops down from the overhead compartment and opens to reveal the three Warner siblings]
YWYakko and Wakko
Helloooooo, nurse!
[Hello Nurse runs off, and Yakko and Wakko pursue her. Dot dances away on her toes to the tune of "Dance of the Reed Flutes"]
Slappy[to the camera] That was pointless.
Slappy[comes out of her tree, drinking a can of diet walnut soda] Aah, diet soda. Heh. Gotta watch my figure. [showing her legs] Hey, somebody's gotta watch it. [chuckles, and walks away from her tree]
[from the window] Where're you going, Aunt Slappy?!
SlappyTo the store for some buttermilk.
Speeewww!
SlappyHey, they make it, somebody's gotta drink it.
[Slappy is walking by a white picket fence, drinking her diet walnut soda. She opens a trashcan, but notices Candie Chipmunk's tree. She winces. She throws the can away into Candie's trash can, and starts to walk off]
[comes out] Excuse me!
SlappyYou're excused.
Um, would you mind?
SlappyProbably. Look, I ain't interested in Amway, lady, all right?
Would you mind removing your can from my trash receptacle?
SlappyAllen Funt is a dead man.
That is my trash can. I'm sure you must have a trash can of your own.
Slappy[walks back to the trash can] Let me get this straight. You want me to take my soda can out of your trash can, walk all the way back over to my tree, and throw it in my trash can?
That's right. Do you have a problem with that?
SlappyNo, but now you do. [takes the can out of the trash can]
[relieved] Thank you so much. Buh-bye.
SlappyYou're welcome so much. Buh-bye. [Candie closes the door; to the viewer] If I were a better person, I'd ignore her and go on with my life. But I'm not. [cackles]
[Skippy, dressed as a Girl Scout, rings the doorbell. Candie Chipmunk opens the door]
Hey, miss lady. Would you like to buy some cookies? All the proceeds go to help Squirrel Scouts to be more like you.
Isn't that appropriate. I'll take one box. [Skippy winks at the viewer. She takes the box and goes inside. Skippy speeds off] I love helping out children less perfect than I. [opens the box, takes out the same can, and gasps. "You're a Horse's Ass" plays in the background. She growls]
[Wipe to Slappy's tree where and Skippy laugh. Candie throws the can at the back of Slappy's head offscreen]
SlappyOof! [her hat landed on Skippy's head] Let the games begin.
[Slappy, dressed as a lawyer, rings the doorbell offscreen. Candie opens the door]
SlappyVictoria Sifuentes, attorney at law. My card. [shows card] Ipso facto on this date-o, your late-us Uncle Festoon has passed on and left you this.
My, my. Oh, why, thank you. [takes the crate into hertree. She carries it into her living room] I wonder what it could be. [opens the crate with a crowbar. She looks and searches through the packing peanuts] Aha! [finds the same can, and gasps. "You're a Horse's Ass" plays in the background. She becomes angry, and her teeth break]
[Wipe back to Slappy's tree where and Skippy are laughing again]
Slappy[stops laughing] Skippy, in most cases, revenge is not a good thing. [gets bonked on the head with her can. Her hat lands on Skippy's head again] In other cases, it's the only thing.
[Candie skips out of her tree to her mailbox. She opens the mailbox. She opens an envelope]
[reading letter] "Dear Candie Chipmunk, congratulations. You have been chosen to appear on the new game show entitled 'The New Game Show'. Come to the studio right away." Imagine me on a game show. What'll I wear?
[Wipe to The New Game Show. Candie wears corn around her head]
HHost
All right, Candie. You've already won a washer-dryer, a wet bar, a lexus, The Love Boat, Cher's house, and the planet Venus.
AAudience
Ooh. Aah.
HHost
Do you want to keep your prizes, or trade them for something possibly even bigger behind curtain number 3?
[Show girl shows the curtain]
[in unison with Wakko] Hello, nurse!
Boys, go fig.
I'll take...the curtain!
[The curtain reveals both Slappy and the can. "You're a Horse's Ass" plays in the background. Candie shakes with insanity. Cut to Slappy's tree where she and Skippy watches TV as Candie explodes offscreen]
She exploded!
SlappyIt's a toon thing. [a knocks on door] Shoot me [she opens the door, and Candie throws the can at her head from outside the tree offscreen] Look at that, she ain't recycling.
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