Berg quotes from Two Guys, a Girl and a Pizza Place

Johnny

I always thought you and Irene made a better couple.

Berg

Really?

Johnny

Yeah, I mean no matter how weird you act or how big of an ass you make of yourself, it doesn't seem to bother her.

Berg

What's that?

Pete

Well, at first look it's a date plaque, but since there's no such thing it is a piece of wood screaming "Danger! Danger!"

Berg

I told Irene that I love her.

Pete

Really? Wow! I'm shocked! I mean I'm happy for you...no, not yet, I'm still shocked.

Berg

My grandfather used to use an expression which I think might apply here.

Ashley

What was that?

Berg

'Shut up Ashley.'

My insides are something special.

Berg

Well sucks for you that you weren't born inside out.

Berg

Pete I need a favour.

Pete

Sure.

Berg

Can you ask Irene for a cup of urine?

Pete

Why, are we out?