Cooder quotes from The Simpsons

Cooder

Hey, you lost your money fair and square! I didn't scam nobody!

Homer

[laughing] Put down your stick. We're here to work.

Bart

Starting today, we're carnies, just like you.

Cooder

Well, in that case, let me show you how I scammed you.

Cooder

[Explaining the ring toss booth] The main thing is to bring in the rubes.

Do whatever it takes. Sweet talk, insults, slang from the '30s that no one uses anymore.

Bart

Like "rubes"?

Now you're on the trolley.

Chief Wiggum

Word around here is your game is crooked.

Homer

And how!

Chief Wiggum

Well, perhaps we can come to an "understanding". [holds out his hand]

Homer

I understand.

Bart

Uh, Dad?

Homer

Not now, son. Daddy's talking to the policeman.

Chief Wiggum

Let me put it to you this way. I'm looking for my friend, Bill. Have you seen any Bills around here?

Homer

No. He's Bart.

Chief Wiggum

Okay, let's try this again and watch as I wink each time. The man I'm really looking for, wink, is Mr Bribe. Wink, wink.

Homer

[pause] ...It's a ring toss game.

Chief Wiggum

All right, That's it, I'm shutting this place down.

Homer

What ain't that nothing?

Cooder

Our game, our home... What happened here?

Bart

Cops took it.

Cooder

Why didn't you bribe 'em?

Homer

I tried, but the opportunity never came up.