Rosa quotes from The Casagrandes

[gets up from the buried pile of dirty chonies and steams with fury] No more pranks in my house! [points to the door] FUERA!

Oh, I wish I could sleep all day like Lalo.

Sí, that is one lucky perro.

[clinks her glass] I'd like to make a toast. Bobby, Lori. I just want to say how much it means to have you here with us. [tears up] I don't know if I can't get through this.

[touched] Oh, Mom.

[clinks his glass] Uh, excuse me if I might. I'm sure it means a lot to you, Rita, but with all respect, it means more to us.

Well, Hector, that seems really unlikely because nothing means more to us, 'kay?

Oh, really?

Yeah.

Is that so?

Yeah, that's right.

Forget the toast. I can say it so much better with music! [starts playing his guitar] We love Bobby and Lori more than... [Lynn Sr. elbows Luna and she dashes off] ...Anyone in the world.

[brings in her axe and starts playing, cutting Hector off] FAMILY!

Oopsie.

[viscously] How DARE YOU! [violently attacks Carl]

Control your children! It is not safe to have Thanksgiving in this house!

Well, if you don’t like it, YOU'RE WELCOME TO LEAVE! Not you, Bobby, you can stay.

That's what you want, isn't it? To steal our precious Roberto away from us?! [hugs Bobby tightly]

[hugs Lori as well] Oh, oh, like you haven't been trying to steal Lori from us! Well guess what, BUCKO, it's not gonna happen!

[pleading while intervening] Guys, guys, please stop!

STAY OUT OF THIS!

Why would anybody want to spend Thanksgiving here, gnawing on your "dry-bird?"

[comforting her husband as he sobs] The turgooseon is delicious, the only problem is, you're lumpy gravy!

[enters the dining room] Did someone say gravy? [squirts gravy on Rita as she shrieks]

[bumps Gravybot aside] No. They don't deserve it.

[jumps towards her siblings] Look out below!

[gasps horrifyingly] My painting!

I'm sorry, Boo-Boo Bear, I know you were looking forward to having a real Thanksgiving this year.

Bobby

It's not all bad. [holds up some turkey jerky] I found this half-off turkey jerky.

Jumping jerky! Holy hot dogs! [gets up afterwards]

Bobby

Whoa, how did you guys find us?

Tracking devices. [both look at each other]

You left before trying my twice-baked tart.

[scoffs] They would prefer my flan.

Flan, shman. [chanting] Tart, tart, tart–!

Bobby

Stop! Don't you guys see? This is why we left. We couldn't stand the fighting and competing.

We don't want to choose sides. So maybe from now on, we should just spend Thanksgiving by ourselves.

Well, nobody wants that.

We certainly don't.

Lori, Bobby, I'm sorry we've been acting so childishly.

We're sorry, too. It's just hard to let go of your kids. [to the Casagrandes] You know what? You should get Lori and Bobby for Thanksgiving.

Well, goodness knows we haven't done anything to deserve that. They should spend it with you.

Hey, I got an idea. Why don't you just rotate every year, huh? Much like the juicy hot dogs I'm selling at a mere 40% mark-up. Holiday discount.

Bobby

Works for us.

I'm glad we figured out future years, but what about right now? I'm starving!

Bobby

Well, we've got hot dogs and sunflower seeds and 20 kinds of artisanal jerky. Maybe we could throw a dinner together here.

I'm game.

Me too.

We could make this place look festive. I think I have some leftover decorations in the car.

I'll help you.

Hurry, hurry! "Adiós, Ana, Adiós" is on!

Whoo! Yes! Telenovela time!

[squawks] Mystery! Drama! Romance!

Don't forget style. Obsessed with Ana's outfits.

Bobby

I'm gonna have to watch it in the mercado. My shift's about to start.

It's okay, mi'jito. We'll shout out the window about the juicy parts.

Bobby

Yes!

[rushes in] Did I miss it? Whoa! [Slips on Lalo's drool and makes Ronnie Anne fall to the floor] Ooh, sorry, mija.

I'm glad you could tear yourself away from your gossip long enough to be here, viejito.

Who was gossiping? I was dealing with Maybelle. And you know what a difficult customer she is.

Are you sure you don't want to join us, mija? The novela is getting really good!

Ronnie Anne

[shakes her head] Mm.

Come on. Just give it a chance. It's a family tradition.

You can sit by me.

Ronnie Anne

Guys, I told you already. I'm not into telenovelas. Call me when the soccer match is on.

Shh! How can you say no to this? [TV shows Ana sitting on a stool sewing a hat with her grandparents] That's our hero, Ana Ronalda. She's an orphan raised by her grandparents.

Rosa?

Ronnie Anne?

Lynn?

Ronnie Anne

Lincoln?

[in unison with Lynn Sr.] What a surprise!

[in unison with Rosa] I can't believe this!

This is incredible!

Ronnie Anne

I know!

The Lynn-sagna!

[angrily having enough] That's it. You just got yourself uninvited from Thanksgiving!

Yeah!

Well, thank you. Now, I won't have to choke on your dry-turkey. And you can forget about coming for Christmas.

Ronnie Anne

Yeah!

Good! We don't like your soggy tamales anyway!

Yeah!

[gasps in horrified shock] This friendship is officially over!

Fine by me! Lincoln, say goodbye to Ronnie Anne forever!

You too, Ronnie Anne.

[entering the rooftop, and finds the Loud family] Louds? What are you all doing here?

[nervously] Rosa! H-H-Hey! We were, uhhh... just, you know, uh, trying out Lisa's new teleportation device. [chuckles] It works! [to Lisa] Nice job, sweetie.

[facepalms] Oh, jeez.

O-M-Gosh, really? I thought we were hiding from the Casagrandes.

[winces] Uh…

[also winces] Oh.

What? [hurt] Hiding from us? I don't understand.

We have to fix this.

But what about your article?

Some things are more important, Lincoln. [Later that evening, inside Apartment 2A, explains the Casagrandes about why they did what they had to do, when they hurt their feelings] So the whole point of not telling you was to spare your feelings, but clearly by sneaking around, we've hurt you even more.

Yes, you have. You could have been honest with us, we would have understood.

[tearing up] We messed up.

We're really sorry.

Can you guys ever forgive us?

Claro que sí.

Obviously.

Of course!

Mmm… I'll think about it. I need time to heal. [Rosa glares at him] I'm healed.

Rita, go finish your article, I don't want you to miss your deadline. But after that, maybe you can all stay for dinner.

We'd love to. [she and Rosa hug and rushes off to get her laptop from Camperzilla; later typing her deadline on the roof, voice-over] "As our summer adventure comes to an end in Great Lakes City, I'm reminded that it's not always what you do that makes a trip, it's the people you spend time with."

[in his birdcage; squawks] This is embarrassing! I don't need a babysitter! I'm a big bird!

A big bird who gets into big trouble. I'm sorry, but we can't take you to Carlos' lecture today and have you behave like you did at the last one.

And now, a rare Mesoamerican bowl that dates back to 1519. It's the only one of its kind left in the world.

A little privacy, please?!

[gasps in shock] Sergio, what are you doing?! Shoo! [Sergio flies out of the auditorium, causing the bowl to wobble and splash water and soap into his face] AH! Soap in my eye! [accidentally knocks over the bowl and gasps]

[laughing about the incident before Rosa glares at him] What? It was funny when Dad started crying. [Rosa continues glaring at him] Uh, I mean, shame on you, Sergio!

[opens the door; happily] Rosa, Carl, Sergio! Please, come in!

Gracias, and thank you for watching Sergio tonight.

It's our pleasure.

[sees Lola sitting on the sofa] Lola! My favorite Loud. Is that a new crown? It really brings out…

Cut to the chase, Casagrande.

[groans] My dad's lectures are dullsville, and I can't sit through another if Sergio isn't gonna be there to wreck it.

Hmm. Sounds like a you problem… [Carl offers her some cash] that, I might be able to help with.

[firmly] Okay, Sergio, you'd better be on your best behavior with the Louds. If you pull any of your usual stunts, I'm sending you to bird boot camp. [Sergio gulps and whimpers worriedly; later, back in the van, waves goodbye] Thanks again! We'll pick him up tomorrow morning. [drives off as Rita, holding Sergio in his cage, and Lynn Sr. wave farewell… only to come to a stop and come back, holding out Lola, disguised as Carl] Nice try, Lola. Carl would never call the van seats "tacky." He doesn't even know what that means.

Carl, it didn't work!

[comes out, disguised as Lola] Worth a shot. [as they walk up to each other, he demands her a refund]

Sorry. No refunds or exchanges.

Hey, Sergio. [lets him out of his cage] The other pets are waiting for you out by Charles' doghouse.

[squawks] Sergio has arrived! So, what's the plan? What are we doing for fun today? [the Loud pets take out some playing cards and play a game of Old Maid] Ugh, Old Maid? [squawks] You call that fun? Ugh, no, thank you.

That was amazing! I had you guys all wrong. You're totally cool, not mention, very clever. Mind if I hang till the fam gets back? [The pets look at each other and nod in agreement; Next morning, they're all playing a game of Old Maid in Charles' doghouse] Ooh, a match!

Oh, Sergio! The Louds tell me you were the perfect houseguest.

What can I say? It's easy when you're hanging with friends.

Well, I'm very proud of you. Now, come on. It's time to go.

Aw, five more minutes? I'm about to win at Old Maid!

[off-screen] Rita, why is the basement covered in pigeon poop?!

[panicking as Rosa glares grumpily at him, realizing what he's really been up to] Gotta go! [flies off as Rosa storms off after him, while the Loud pets laugh and the iris closes in on them]

[enters the apartment, excited, along with Bobby, looking upset] OMG, guys, look! Bobby and I got our BAT scores in the mail!

Ooh, what's a BAT test? [gasps] You get to sleep upside down and eat crickets?!

No, Carl. BAT stands for "Big Academic Test." It's to get into college, and I crushed it! Fashion design school, here I come!

Oh, I'm so proud of you, mija. Go pursue your dreams! But don't leave me BACK! [sobs]

Is something wrong, Bobby?

Bobby

I didn't get a good BAT score.

[gasps] Who wouldn't want to give mi Bobbito a good score? [takes of her shoe and goes to the door] I'll just give those testing people a piece of my mind!

Bobby

[runs up to the door, blocking her way] I don't think that'll help, Abuela. [groans] I really wanted to do well so I could go to business school and open up a whole chain of mercados. I don't know what happened. I aced all my practice tests, but as soon as I sat down, my palms got sweaty and I forgot everything! Like, even where I parked, [pulls out the van keys from his pocket] I had to walk home!

Wait, you left the mercado van there?! I'm gonna get a ticket! [grabs the keys and leaves]

Huh, sounds like a classic case of test-taking anxiety. My students get it all the time. Never fear, Bobby. There are many scientific ways to beat it! I'll help you.

Bobby

Deal!

[gets his hand covered in sweat] Eh, you weren't kidding about your sweaty palms. [chuckles]

Hey!

[furiously shaking her shoe in front of Carlos' face] You lost your torta privileges, mister!

[clears throat] You might be wondering why I’ve gathered you here today.

To smell a bunch of dirty laundry?

No. I want to bring you in on an exciting investment opportunity. Our very own spooky tour! All we have to do is make up some spooky junk, give the people some scares, and the money will come pouring in! [laughs, then focuses] So, what spooky thing should we feature on the tour?

[comes in the room, taps him on the shoulder, startling him; unhappy] Ay, Carl. This room is filthy. You were supposed to make your bed and pick up your dirty clothes. And give Lalo a flea bath.

And I'm totally gonna. Later.

You better listen, Carl, or El Cucuy will come after you. He always knows when children are misbehaving. He watches you with his glowing red eyes and he can hear you from miles away with his giant hairy ear.

Abuelo has a giant hairy ear and he can't hear his cell phone ring.

I'm serious, Carl. [goes after Hector] Hector, su teléfono!

[lifts up the couch] ¿Sergio, done estas! [sets the couch down] Where did he go?! It’s not like him to just disappear like… [breaks down in tears] THIIIIIIIII-IS!!!

Bobby

I wish you could just fly away... [In slow motion] ...and NEVER! COME! BACK!!!

Roberto, you were the last one to see him. Did you see where he went?

Bobby

Uh... [eyes dart to and from] No! It's not like I'd told him to leave and never come back. [nervous laugh] "But I'll go look for him.

Well, Sergio's not here either.

"CARL!!"