Carl quotes from The Casagrandes

[enters excitedly] Hola, I'm home! Ho, you guys will never guess what Vito wears to bed! [only sees his family, all super mad at him] What? You already know about the bunny pajamas?

No, Abuelo. This is a convention.

Actually, Carl, the word is "intervention."

Hector, your chisme addiction is embarrassing your family.

Bobby

And making the customers mad.

You're a chismoso. And by that, I mean, you're the biggest gossip in town.

What? [not seeing the problem] I'm not a gossip. Anyway, as I was saying… Vito wears his pajamas with huge bunny ears! [the family grumbles at him; realizes what he's doing] Okay, now I see it. I didn't even know I was doing it. I'm sorry. I never meant any harm.

I know, mi amor, but when you talk about people behind their backs, it can be hurtful.

Ah, you're right. As of today, I am swearing off chisme. Right after I tell you about Mr. Scully's toupee. [snickers, then Ronnie Anne shoves a pillow in his mouth to shut him up]

[squawks] This won't be easy.

Ronnie Anne

Don't worry, Abuelo, we can come by the mercado and help you cut the chisme.

[off-screen] It is I, Tuba Boy!

Tuba Boy?

Look, Mama! Tuba Boy, tu-ba rescue!

Alexis is submitting a sidekick too?

And his costume looks amazing.

Yeah, and mine's trash. I really need to step it up if I'm gonna win this contest!

[bumps into Adelaide, in her Pandalaide superhero costume] Adelaide, are you doing the contest too?

Better believe it. The name's Pandalaide! I've got panda power and sweet panda dance moves!

But you don't even watch "El Falcón."

You're right, 'cause the show has no strong female character, but that's where I come in!

Ooh, the letter from the show! [reading] "Dear Carl Casagrande, thank you for your submission. Unfortunately, we didn't find El Pollito to be a very convincing sidekick." [whimpers with heartbreak] What?

Sorry, Carl. Crackers on me tonight.

[showing up along with Adelaide] Carl, we made it into the final round! What about you?

[tearing up, upset] I-I didn't make it. [lays his head flat on the ground, sobbing as Sergio comforts him]

Hey, you seem upset. You want a hug? It's one of Tuba Boy's powers.

No, I'm fine! Everything's fine!

Okay. Well, wish us luck.

[crumples up the letter, angrily] These judges got it all wrong! El Pollito's not convincing? Oh, I'll convince them all right!

Ooh, whatcha thinking? Blackmail? I know a pigeon.

No, we're gonna make another tape to prove the judges wrong. This time, we'll show El Pollito doing heroic acts.

We did it! You're safe now. [unties Sergio]

My heroes!

Sergio?!

Why are you dressed as a baby?

Carl's idea! He wanted to look like a hero for the show.

Carl, you put Sergio in real danger just to rescue him?

[sighs sadly] It's true. I wanted to convince the show they were wrong for not picking me, but obviously, I totally blew it. Sorry. Turns out, I'm not much of a hero.

You're telling me.

You broke my base!

You broke El Falcón's cape!

This is your fault!

[after doing some sleep walking; whispering] It worked! He's asleep!

[whispering] Finally!

[suddenly hears her mijos screaming and growls, they are about to start wrestling when they feel an extra set of hands, so she pulls them apart; angrily whispering] Are you kidding me?! [holds both of them in front of their baby hermano] If either of you wakes Carlitos… [pulls them away; fiercely with a background of fire] you may get grounded for one month! No, two months!

Mega elote!

[shocked] Who? What? Why?

[wakes up from the crying and sees what he's cuddling] Ugh! Lalo?! [Lalo leaves in a huff]

[sees Carlitos crying, then sees her mijos trying to tiptoe out of the room when they woke him up him and stops them] Hold it right there! That's it! Two of you are grounded!

But…

Mom…!

And why are you dressed as sheep?

I don't even care! No buts, no ands, no ifs, and no sos and ours. Go to your favorite rooms. And I may not hear a peep from one of you for the rest of the afternoon!

This is your fault!

[angrily whispering] Hey! I said, not…a…peep.

Moms are weird.

[hurries back to Apartment 2B; gasps in horror as Malo breaks down the door] You're not Lalo! [Malo blows raspberry at her and leaves; enters her apartment, shocked to see the mess] And what you've done es muy malo! Now I have no work to show tonight! [breaks down, bawling]

[enters the apartment] Frida, it's showtime! [notices her on the ground; surprised] Ay, mujer! What happened in here?

[confessing] I can't live a lie anymore! I didn't paint the piece you loved yesterday! It was Lalo! [continues sobbing] And I just took credit for it because I had painter's block! I'm so sorry.

Chica, I wish you had told me the truth. Every artist gets stuck sometimes. It's just part of being an artist.

[sniffs] Really? Uh, but what about the show and the important collector?

Frida, I care about you more than all of that. We can reschedule. I just want you to give yourself a break.

Oh, thanks. Maybe I need to take some time to find my inspiration.

Inspiration will find you. That's what I love about your work, Frida. You always have a way of channeling your life experiences into art.

[enters Carl and CJ's room, covering his ears from hearing Carl play the bassoon; squawks] Make it stop!

No can do, I need to learn the bassoon to get into the junior band. Actually, you know what? I think I'm holding it upside down.

You? School spirit? [squawks] What do you got cooking?

The perfect plan. [takes out a diagram] I'll play with the band at the halftime show, and as soon as they're done, I'll launch into a DJ set.

[takes the diagram out of his hand] It's devious, mischievous. [sheds happy tears] I'm so proud of you. And it's a great chance for me to sell your merch. I keep %10 bassoon away.

[madly disappointed] Look who it is, the boy who RUINED OUR PERFORMANCE! [snaps her mallet over her knee in rage]

I am so sorry guys. I just wanted to expand my audience. I never meant to ruin your show.

[sniffling] Forget it, DJ Carl, it's over.

Wait, who's my padrino? [pan over to Sergio, scratching his butt with a fork and farts; shocked] Sergio is my niño?!

Relax. When have I ever put you in danger? [accidentally flicks his fork and it cuts the rope of the chandelier, causing it to crash to the ground]

[angrily to Carlos] You had one job, Carlos!

Ah, I love Fridays. I can already smell the weekend. Freedom, pizza…

Ronnie Anne

[desolated] It's Monday, Carl.

Carlota, I'm here to tell you that you're missing a PE credit. You'll have to make it up, ASAP.

Oh, no, see, I don't love sports so, I took extra art classes. That should be enough credits, right?

[not buying it] I'm afraid it doesn't work that way. If you don't get that PE credit, you can't graduate.

[shocked] What?!

Good news is, there's still time to join a sport. [walks away] Have fun!

Worst day ever! First, it's Monday, and now I'm not gonna graduate?!

Ronnie Anne

What? Carlota, you just have to join a sport. Easy-peasy.

You don't understand, Ronnie Anne. Sports are really not my thing.

Ronnie Anne

Not yet. Maybe you just haven't found the right one. I can help with that.

Pfft, good luck. Wouldn't want her on my team.

Why does Abuela get to pick what we do today? [gasps] Can I pick?

I wanna pick!

Ronnie Anne

I wanna pick!

No. It's Abuela's turn. Rosa, get in here before these bobo's steal your pick!

Coming! Who's ready for a fun day of birdwatching in the woods?

Ronnie Anne

Uh, say what?

Birdwatching is my new favorite hobby, and I want to see how many different pajaros we can spot from my book, "Cuckoo for Birding."

Ronnie Anne

Abuela, I don't know. Birdwatching sounds, uh, how do I put this nicely? Super boring.

I think I'm literally melting.

Melting? I'm literally molting!

Ronnie Anne

So Abuela, where are these famous birds you wanted to see?

[shrugs] Well, guess they're not here. Okay, come on, let's go.

Wait! We haven't even tried all the bird calls that I learned. [squawks, but summons accidentally summons Bitsy] Whoops. That's the elephant call. [tweets, but accidentally summons two hipsters] Sorry, that must be the hipster call.

Are you guys birdwatching?

[scoffs] We were doing that before it was cool. Huh?

[clinging onto one of them] TAKE US WITH YOU!!!

Don't worry, kids. Birdwatching takes time.