Grandpa SquarePants quotes from SpongeBob SquarePants

SpongeBob

[puts on his safety glasses; turns into a spring and bounces after the jellyfish; stops in midair and looks down] Huh? [stretches out and starts falling downward, now in normal form] [screams and hits the ground] Ooh! [separates into nine smaller SpongeBobs. Eight of them panic in a circle and then join back together. The ninth SpongeBob then passes by laughing, which SpongeBob catches and places in an open space on his backside; wipes the sweat off his forehead] Phew! I salute you, old majestic jellyfish. [salutes a jellyfish that buzzes over his head] Your command of the sky is unmatched. Floating just out of the reach of my net, but near enough that I can see your untamed beauty. [a jellyfish floats up and down above SpongeBob's palm; music begins to play as a microphone lowers in front of him; he clears his throat] ♪If only I could join you there in the air. Floating free without a care. I wish I could fly. And see things with a different eye.♪ [SpongeBob's two eyes combine into one big eye; the camera zooms into it and his pupil becomes him flying through the sky] ♪I would fly so very high and touch the sky.♪ [flies through a cloud] ♪And never have to ask why it is that I can't fly--♪ [the blue sky backdrop turns back into Jellyfish Fields, and SpongeBob falls to the ground; he gets up] Wait a minute. I'm forgetting the words of Grandpa SquarePants. [a thought cloud appears above SpongeBob's head; SpongeBob's grandfather is inside of it]

Grandpa SquarePants

If we were meant to fly, we'd have propellers on our heads or jet engines on our backs. [the cloud disappears]

SpongeBob

[snaps] I'm gonna follow his advice, by gum. I'll invent a flying machine.

SpongeBob

What's so funny?

Patrick

Well, it's like my grandpa used to say. [a thought cloud appears over his head; Grandpa SquarePants is inside it again]

Grandpa SquarePants

If we were meant to fly... [notices Patrick] Hey, I'm not your grandfather! [pokes Patrick in the head with his cane; the thought cloud disappears]

SpongeBob

Well, here I go, Patrick! [runs to the front] I'm off to fly with the jellyfish! Ignition, check! [spins the propeller around] Landing gear... [kicks the tire] check! Complimentary peanuts... [holds up a bag of peanuts] check-a-rooni. [hops into the cockpit, now with a hat and glasses on] Ready for takeoff! [pushes a handle forward; the plane starts up, then comes to pieces; the propeller spins through the air and slices through a grain silo next to the farm; sand pours out of it and covers him and Patrick]

Patrick

You cut a hole in Farmer Jenkins' grain silo!

SpongeBob

Don't remind me.

[runs up] I knew no good would come from city folk and their flying machines. Now git! [Patrick and SpongeBob run away]

Patrick

We better do what he says. He knows how to grow food!

Patrick

Okay.

SpongeBob

Go! [Patrick starts pedaling; lifts up off the bucket he is standing on and flies through the air] It's working! I'm flying! [flies past three fish on the side of the road]

SpongeBob

Grandma? Hello. Grandma, I'm sorry about earlier. So, what do ya say? Can we discuss forgiveness over a cup of your famous hot cocoa?

Oh, my sweet, I would love to whip that up for you right after you...

Make your own hot cocoa! I'm busy! [thunder clap; cut to the exterior of Grandma's house]

SpongeBob

[yells offscreen] NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

[laughing]

SpongeBob

Grandma? You can't stop laughing either?

Of course not, dearie. My funny bone got stuck years ago when I was your age.

SpongeBob

Your funny bone?

That's right. It happens to everyone in our family. Be proud of that laugh, SpongeBob. To be a SquarePants is to laugh loud at life. Enjoy a good laugh with me.

SpongeBob

Aww, thanks, Grandma?

These tearjerker movies always crack me up. [she and her grandson share a heartfelt laugh together]

Patrick

[crying] I'm all out of popcorn! Now, it's a tragedy! [blows his nose in the empty popcorn bag]