A character in Robot Chicken
Superman
Robot Chicken · 315 quotes
Tied for 10th most-quoted character in Robot Chicken: in 4 of its 315 quotes
Most scenes with: Flash (2)
Listen, uh, I don't mean to be nitpicky or anything, but, um, the living room hasn't been vacuumed in weeks and...
Hey, Waterman, I was busy, you know...realigning the planet, or something.
But you drew vacuuming out of the job jar and everyone else...
Face it. Who's gonna save the Earth from a giant meteor while Superman's vacuuming? You? I don't think so.
I could. Hey!
Good evening. As you know, I have dealt with many aliens in the past, but now you criticize me about the Mexico alien. [Cut to the Desert of California with a long wired fence that can keep the aliens out] Here, I show you how the great state of California has dealt with the Mexico border issue. Here we have the high-tech border fence with the highly trained border guard. Now, who will explain further.
People runnin' across the border was a problem, but these new systems are impregnable...
[preparing to run under the border fence] Andale, Andale! Arriba, Arriba! [speeds away]
[angrily] Son of a bitch.
Cracking down on the crimes will discourage the immigrants from coming here illegally.
That's him! He drew a "Z" on my wall.
Yes, right, after I broke up a robbery. I'm a fucking hero! Aah! Chingo tu madre!
We must stop the hiring of the illegal aliens. I asked for this water an hour ago! You are too slow!
Slow? But mi nombre es Slowpoke Rodriguez.
You, the security people. Take the mouse and deport him!
No, señor! They'll execute me in mi country! You are killing me! YOU ARE KILLING ME...!
But we are also compassionate for the children found in the border.
We found this little girl wandering around with no parental supervision.
Soy un explorer! Estoy en una adventura magnífico, con mi amigo Boots! [Translation: I'm a explorer! I'm on a magnificent adventure, with my friend Boots!]
Which we dealt with per CDC regulations.
[Cut to another Border Patrol officer who kills Boots by snapping his neck.]
And here is the latest hero to fight the illegal border crime: Superman!
Thank you, Governor. We Super Friends had no idea that El Dorado was an illegal when we let him join our ranks. I'm on my way to deport him right now.
Yeah yeah, good job with that Superman thing going on there. Now how did you come to this great country yourself? [a moment, then Superman flies away and breaks through a ceiling] Gott in Himmel!
Sir, if you have a moment, I want to talk about how you got into this country?
[a moment, then] ...Up, up, and away! [also flies away and crashing through the ceiling. Border Patrol Officer #2 tries to catch Schwarzenegger to no avail]
So long, Flash! You'll have to pick up the pace if you want to catch Reverse Flash!
Uh! Again with Reverse Flash! He looks just like me, but with the exact opposite color scheme, brilliant.
At least he wears a mask. Bizzaro Superman looks just like me, but with a face like somebody threw up in an ice tray. Seriously, looks like someone shit out kryptonite and then put it on someone's face again.
Have you ever seen Negative Wonder Woman?
[wearing sleeves and stockings, displaying her breasts and pubes] Hey Wonder Woman! [Bleep] you! Now where did I leave my visible jet? Oh, look, there it is. Easy to find!
Don't grab her or anything.
I grab her.
Grab her till she couldn't walk. Booyah!
Santa's so fast, he delivers presents to the whole wide world in one night.
Superman is faster! He circled the planet and made us all forget about that earthquake that killed Lois Lane.
What earthquake?
Exactly, bitch!
[flies down] Kids! Kids! Take it easy.
[surprised] Superman!
It's not important who's fastest.
Spoken like a true puss.
[insulted] What did you [bleep]ing say?! I would whip Santa's fat ass! Is that what you wanna hear, you little [bleep]ing turd?! [knocks the boy's coffee mug out of his hand] You come at me! You come at me like a [bleep]ing man! [smacks the boy's head and flies up into the air]
[laughing] I've got to blog about the [bleep] that just went down right here!
[At the North Pole]
Ol' Supes thinks he's the fastest, aye? [laughs]
So, who is the fastest, Santa?
[laughs] That's not important.
Spoken like a true puss.
[insulted, knocks the elf's Coke bottle out of his hand before meeting Superman at the top of the Earth] We doing this, blue balls?!
You got that right, Saint Dick! [cut to him and Santa, ready to race around the world] Hey! No fair using reindeer!
[sarcastically] Oh, okay. No fair using our yellow sun then, you [bleep]ing alien!
[The boy shoots a gun where Superman and Santa race. And after hours, Santa and Superman are then seen racing over the finish line at the exact same time, surprising everyone]
It's a tie!
What a complete and total waste of everybody's time!
Well, even a tie has some entertainment value.
Booo!!!
[The Flash speeds off]
[laughs] Sorry we took so long, folks.
Ho ho ho! We ran into a few race hazards. [opens the door of his sleigh, revealing Lex Luthor, who is beaten up]
Lex Luthor, here, tried to decue us both permanently!
Luckily, we stopped him, but only by working together.
[Everyone cheered]
I think they're buying it. Bump it.
[fist bumps with Superman] Anticipated.
Up up and away.
[waking up] What? Where am I? I was at my mother's doing laundry and-
Weaponizing anthrax, Luthor?! Not on my watch!
[confused] What? Weaponiz-
[Santa Claus slams the door in Lex Luthor's face before the two high five and smile at the camera. During the credits, Santa and Superman are seen doing what they really did when they had the race]
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Robot Chicken pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
