Needles Nelson quotes from Rescue Me

Needles

[after they come back from the fire that killed 7 kids] You know, a lot of us, me included, you know, we say that the heros are the guys who don't make it back to the house. But tonight, you're my goddamn heroes. That was a ball buster, and everyone of 'ya did what you were supposed to do. Includin' the new guy. I'm goddamn proud to be workin' with a crew like this. Any minute that alarm is gonna go and we will have to make run because some fat broad got her big ass stuck in a tub or some asshole went off the rails on some west side highway. He's all banged up, but he's still alive because he's as high as a goddamn kite. We are gonna answer those calls the same way we answered this one tonight; balls to the wall, gentlemen. If anybody needs me, I'm gonna be in my office... I'm gonna call my wife and kids and have a nice big mug of Jack Daniels.

Black Shawn

I'm just waitin' for Tommy, I gotta talk to him.

Needles

Oh, about bangin' his daughter?

Black Shawn

What the hell! Who told you? ... Lou!

Needles

Lou's bangin' her, too?

Black Shawn

That's some bullshit, I cannot believe he told you. It's supposed to be top secret!

Needles

I heard it from Neills.

Black Shawn

Neills knows?

Needles

What are you so surprised about? People hear juicy gossip, they're gonna spread it around. This is a firehouse, you take away the rig, the gear and the testosterone, it's nothing but a goddamn sorority in here.

Franco

[about his next boxing opponent] Yeah. No, this guy looks a little bit questionable chief. I mean is he in the department or what?

Needles

He's in the system.

Franco

The system. What system?

Needles

The penal system. Killed a guy with his thumb. Allegedly. Don't worry he's wearing gloves.

Needles

The deal is 30 days. You quit drinking for 30 days.

Tommy

In a row?

Needles

Lou, we're not putting him in the ring with Keira Knightley. We are gonna find the biggest, ugliest, meanest lesbian on this planet.

Lou

Hillary Clinton would never do this.

Needles

She's not a lesbian.

Lou

Yeah, I know, but would you fight her?

Needles

Not without weapons.

Needles

In my heaven, every man that's ever done this job and laid down his life in the line of duty, like the 343 from 9/11, they get the best seats in the house.

Do you believe in heaven?

Lou

Yes, I do.

Sean

What's heaven like for you?

Lou

Free hot doughnuts on floating trays.

Franco

What about hell?

Lou

Barbra Streisand.

Sean

Is she singing?

Lou

No, she's not singing. She's alone. She's just there. She's just kinda loitering, and I'm burning up in flames. They're lickin' my body, and she's just standing there a couple yards away, just looking at me with that weird, crazed, kinda go-funny eye of hers just glarin' at me. For Hitler, she'd be singing.