Rob Brydon quotes from QI

Rob Brydon

Now, the socks that man in the middle is wearing, very long socks, and just out of interest for you, that’s something that I’ve turned to recently. I now favour the longer sock.

Stephen Fry

Do you? Can you take me through your reasoning?

Rob Brydon

Yes, I can, I’ll show you. [He slowly pulls up his trouser leg.] The gentleman’s sock. Now Jo, you as a lady, you’re gonna think this sock is gonna stop a lot sooner than it does. So watch this. Look at that. Surely you’ve reached the peak. Surely we’ve peaked.

Stephen Fry

Oh, my word! He’s wearing tights!

Rob Brydon

Can I say, not so much for Jo, but Stephen, Alan and Sean, I urge you to give it a go. Because it gives you a feeling of security.

Jo Brand

They do make you look like a nob-head.

Sean Lock

I just wonder what's gonna happen to you when you go, like, skydiving. You go: "Wow! [spreading his hands] That's incredible! Forget the socks! This is amazing!"

Rob Brydon

I have been skydiving.

Sean Lock

Have you tried jelly? That's nice.

Rob Brydon

I give you one theory and you look at me like I’m an ass!

Stephen Fry

I was just, I can’t...

Rob Brydon

No, you’ve done this before on this show!

David Mitchell

Is this radio...?

Rob Brydon

I haven’t said anything for a while.

Stephen Fry

Date of death?

Rob Brydon

August 16th, 1977.

David Mitchell

It’s like Radio 2 in the middle of the night!

Rob Brydon

You look backwards, because history teaches us the future. Because from history, we learn patterns, and as Dr Phil says time and time again, the greatest indicator of future behaviour is past behaviour.

Johnny Vegas

[Putting a hand on Rob’s shoulder.] When are you gonna realise he’s not interested?

Stephen Fry

I’m so...

Rob Brydon

He is interested. [To Stephen.] Tell him you’re interested.

Stephen Fry

I’m very interested.

Stephen Fry

There is this strange thing called libration, which is like vibration but beginning with an L. It was a thing that was noted by quite a few of the early astronomers...

Rob Brydon

Can I say, sorry Stephen, but that's not an acceptable way of defining a word: Libration. It's like vibration, but beginning with an L.

Rob Brydon

Well, it makes sense now, when you think about when you're being in a hot country, and you're tossing at night and you can't get off, and then you hear the…

Alan Davies

[long look]

Rob Brydon

No! No, no, no.

Stephen Fry

[sympathetic look]

Rob Brydon

I'm simply not having it!

Sandi Toksvig

Sounds like it.

Rob Brydon

I wore trousers very much like that. With the long sock, of course.

Stephen Fry

We know about your long socks.

Rob Brydon

Don’t we just?

Rob Brydon

You know what I would use this for, Stephen? If I was enjoying some salted pistachio nuts at home, while watching the Emmerdale omnibus, I would use this to…

…Kill yourself?

Sandi Toksvig

He can’t have been that ill though, cos he seems to have had time to change his socks.

Alan Davies

I’m dying. Get the death socks.

Rob Brydon

Stephen, can I point out? Can I give the seal of approval to his wonderfully long socks?

Stephen Fry

Rob long socks. Oh dear.

Stephen Fry

Where the hell did I leave my passport?

Alan Davies

I lost mine in a plane once, and it had gone down, under the cushion of my seat. The actual plane seat. And I was on the plane for ages, I refused to get off the plane.

Stephen Fry

You have to get your seat disassembled. I’ve had that.

Alan Davies

And eventually I found it.

Alan Davies

That’s the end of the story.

Stephen Fry

That was a beautiful story. That is a lovely, lovely story.

Rob Brydon

Stephen, is that Alan Davies or is that Peter Ustinov? That was one hell of an anecdote. If that is the level of the bar this evening, I may go home.

Stephen Fry

What did Napoleon say to Josephine on his way back from a journey?

Alan Davies

I sense a trap! The only thing I know about Napoleon and Josephine was he said...

Stephen Fry

Yeah?

Alan Davies

What was it? Rob, what was it?

Rob Brydon

Phill?

Phill Jupitus

Cal?

Cal Wilson

I’m gonna do it. “I’m coming back. Don’t wash.”

Alan Davies

I only know the other one.

Stephen Fry

The other one, which might be...?

Alan Davies

It’s the one, Rob, what’s it...?

Rob Brydon

Phill, you know it.

Phill Jupitus

Cal...