Dr. Doofenshmirtz quotes from Phineas and Ferb

Dr. Doofenshmirtz

[to Perry] You see, back before I was evil, I was something a little less than evil: I was a bratwurst street vendor!

Dr. Doofenshmirtz

What? They had those!

Doofenshmirtz

Ooh... I just felt a disturbance in the cup-stacking universe. I think my record's been broken.

Doofenshmirtz

[disappointed] You know what, Perry the Platypus? I think it's time for you to go! [Perry is shocked by this] That's right, get out! Your services are no longer required. The lighthouse is gone, and there's nothing you can do about it! So you might as well go back Major Monogram and tell him you lost this one!

Dr. Doofenshmirtz

You see, it occurred to me that what I should REALLY be doing is fighting fire with fire. And by "fire", I mean Perry the Platypus. And by "fire", I ALSO mean Perry the Platypus. [beat] It occurred to me while I was on fire.

Dr. Doofenshmirtz

They should have called it, Let's All Dance Until We're in Intensive Care.

Dr. Doofenshmirtz

Perry the Platypus, I just...a golf course! A golf course has lots of traps! I should have said that one first.

Dr. Doofenshmirtz

'Tis the season to be naughty!

Doofenshmirtz

Ah, Perry the Platypus! Welcome to my evil space station! [Echoing: "Station! Station! Cookie! Station!"] Wait, did you hear that? That "cookie" part? I think my echo is broken. I really do. Anyhoo, have a seat.

Dr. Doofenshmirtz

Well, obviously, something's amiss. Uhh, let's review: The Go-away inator which missed the condo, should've zapped whatever it hit to an undesirable location. Let me check my undesirable location wheel. "Stonehenge", "Burbank"... "My Pants"?! Why would I even write that there?! Oh, I see, I got it confused with my dry-cleaning wheel. Oh, okay, but...why do I have a dry-cleaning wheel? "I am a dry-cleaning wheel. Why do I exist?" Perry the Platypus, be a mensch and push the reverse button, would you?

Dr. Doofenshmirtz

If I had a nickel for every time I trapped you. [Clips show Perry getting trapped in every trap with the 5-cent counter reaching up to $1.10]

Dr. Doofenshmirtz

[after getting hit and turning inside-out] Oh, great! Now I need to make an Outside-In-Inator!

Dr. Doofenshmirtz

Perry the Platypus, I can't fight you and drive at the same time!

Dr. Doofenshmirtz

You know, fire is the leading cause of fire.

Dr. Doofenshmirtz

Wait, wait. What's going on here? Is it Christmas already? What happened to Fall? I'm totally unprepared.

Dr. Doofenshmirtz

Perry the Platypus, you totally 1-upped my entrance!