Augustus Hill quotes from Oz

Hill

Hey Schillinger.

Schillinger

What do you want?

Hill

How much would it cost to mail me out of here?

Schillinger

Mail you? What are you talking about?

Hill

I've been trying to think of ways to get out of here.

Schillinger

Escape from Oz?

Hill

Yeah. And I figured, you know, you could box me up in a crate and mail me to my wife overnight express, Priority Mail, whatever. How much would that cost? Postage, shipping, handling, et cetera?

Schillinger

Are you serious?

Hill

Yeah.

Schillinger

Then you're nuts.

Hill

Is that a no?

Schillinger

Yeah. No. No, yeah, it's a no. Get the fuck out of here before I tip you over.

Hill

All right, Vern, I ain't mad at you. You can't help it if you're ugly and stupid.

I say we institute a "no swearing" rule.

El Cid

Fuck you.

Hill

Suck my dick.

Asswipe.

Cocksucker.

Pancamo

You stupid cunt.

Putz.

McManus

If nobody has anything more intelligent to say, this meeting is adjourned.

Hill

I used to box.

Where? In the Special Olympics?

Augustus Hill

Hey, Coyle.

Call me Snake.

Augustus Hill

I changed my mind, man.

What? Ain't nothing like a clean shave, a close shave. Ah, ah, ah, don't squirm, you gonna make me nick your neck. So what you in here for, Augustus?

Augustus Hill

Murder. I killed a cop.

Sweet. But I got you beat. See, I whacked a whole family. Mama, daddy, two little sweet adorable kids. Sweet old grams.

Augustus Hill

What'd this family do to you?

Not a thing.

Augustus Hill

Then why you kill 'em?

For fun.

Augustus Hill

How you kill 'em?

Take a guess.

Augustus Hill

You slit their throats. Why you fucking with me, man?

I ain't fucking with you.

Augustus Hill

You up in Oz for armed robbery.

That I am. See, I never got caught for the murders. And never will.

Augustus Hill

Gimme my wheelchair, man.

Yes, sir. Yessuh, massa. We aim to please.

James Devlin

You know, when I was first elected Governor, crime was out of control, but we went to work, fighting for three strikes and you're out...

Bob Rebadow

That bastard's running for another term after all the crap he’s pulled.

Agamemnon Busmalis

I’m voting for him.

Bob Rebadow

What? Why?

Agamemnon Busmalis

Well, things are better now then they were 4 years ago.

Bob Rebadow

Better for who? Not for us.

Agamemnon Busmalis

Well, in general life has improved across the state since Devlin took office. The economy is up, crime is down.

You’d actually vote for that asshole?

Agamemnon Busmalis

Yes.

Augustus Hill

You can’t vote. You were convicted of a felony. You are no longer eligible to vote.

Agamemnon Busmalis

Really?

Augustus Hill

Really.

Agamemnon Busmalis

Oh, well, that’s okay. I never used to vote anyway.

The courage to lead. James Devlin, Governor.

Augustus Hill

We are both of us, the same, Mobay. Cop killers. Except every single day, I wish I could take back what I'd done.

Goergen was a monster.

Augustus Hill

Yeah, it takes a monster to kill a monster, right?

Augustus Hill

When I was 10 years old, I wanted a real job.

Burr Redding

You wanted a paper route.

Augustus Hill

Right. But instead, you had me selling smack.

Burr Redding

Well, you got to learn the business.

Augustus Hill

Why? Why did I need to learn how to sell drugs?

Burr Redding

Because we didn't have any other options back then. Let me tell you something. I ain't going to apologize for who I am or what I done, all right? Do I wish things had been better? Sure. Do I wish we'd been born in one of them fancy mansions up there on Kellogg Boulevard? Sure. But I don't hope and I don't dream. I take a shit in this world, I see reality and I make the best of it.

Augustus Hill

You ain't got to tell me about reality. I live in Oz. I live in this chair. And I wouldn't be here if you'd let me have the goddammed motherfucking paper route.

Burr Redding

Poet told me what you done.I came to thank you and welcome you back into the fold.

Augustus Hill

I accept your thanks. But I don't want to be back in. I don't want to sell drugs.

Burr Redding

Your choice. I respect that.

Augustus Hill

Respect? I killed a man today. I caused his death to happen. And even though Allah was gonna hurt you, even though the fuck screwed me to this chair, I don't feel good about what I done.

Burr Redding

Well, then, Augustus... I raised you right.