NCIS · Season 7
What is that?
It's a Geiger counter. You can't be too careful.
What do you think Corporal Vega was doing at an empty warehouse?
I don't know. Why don't you pick the lock and find out?
We do not have a warrant.
This building is foreclosed, which means it's owned by the bank, and since the people own the banks I think technically we own the building.
Wow.
McGee, you're with me.
Where we going?
To go look for the bomb.
Don't make me say it, McGee.
We'll be careful, Tony.
Notice anything unusual?
Only that he had about the most perfect teeth I'd ever seen.
We heard. From the last two dentists we visited.
Yeah, well, working on him was almost orgasmic.
Didn't really need to hear that.
His retromolar pad was shaped just like a Renaissance bosom.
Get Ziva and DiNozzo out of bed.
What?!
Wake 'em up.
Oh. Oh, right. Get them out of bed because it's the middle of the night and they're asleep.
[looks at McGee like he's gone mad] Yes.
Individual beds. Get them out of individual beds. I was confused. I thought we were talking --
Need some sleep yourself, do you, McGee?
[He is inside the van] Last one to use the van should have to clean it out. Should be a rule.
There is.
Well, who was the last one to use it?
You were.
[Laughs] I don't think so, 'cause it smells like falafels and I know a certain back-up probie agent that smells a little falafely. You wanna' help?
Sure.
Thank you.
[Kicks the trash can over to Tony and walks over to Damon Werth]
Probie?
Yeah, I'm in the process of becoming a sworn NCIS agent.
Don't you have to be an American citizen to join a federal agency?
I'm also in the process of becoming an American citizen.
And I thought you had to be a legal resident for, you know...
[Interrupting] There are a few strings being tugged.
Pulled. Pull strings.
Tug heart strings.
The heart has strings?
According to poets.
Don't confuse the girl. Taken a lot of marionetting to get her this far.
And who's the puppet master?
Where are we going?
Not far.
And, uh, what are we taking? What's in the truck?
[In a car outside with McGee, wired in] What's in the truck?
What is in the truck?
[Opens truck slowly, everyone is waiting on edge]
[After seeing the watermelon crates, sounding incredulous] Melons?
Did she say melons?
Melons in the truck.
Melons...
What are in these melons?
[opens his eyes to see Tony and Ziva standing in front of his desk] I'm awake.
We didn't say anything, McGee.
But you did something, didn't you? What'd you do?! Did you try and put my hand in this water?
That's a little juvenile.
You drew on my face, didn't you? You drew on my face! [looks at his face]
No. I suggested stripping you naked, putting a tag on your toe and dragging you down to autopsy so that when you woke up you would think you were dead, but Ziva thought it was in poor taste.
Well, thank you, Ziva.
All right. She's a triple digit ride, big old pumpkins in there, but don't get tempted. We gotta get on the big slab and you stay to the granny lane and you keep it under the double nickel, even while you're runnin' deadhead. And bird dog on the dash so you don't get shot in the back by bears, you got it?
10-4.
All right, lets roll!
Hey, we gotta pit stop. [Zwed turns around and looks at Werth]
Three quarters of a tank... I don't like to take chances.
GPS tracking puts them in Front Royal in a few hours.
Let's make it quick.
Umm, what language was that?
He says she's fast, but not to push her, even when we're drivin' empty. And to uh, watch out for cops.
So the truck is a she?
Let's go rob someone.
[Gibbs is at Fornell's doorstep early in the morning. Fornell, who has grown a beard, answers the door and is still in his bathrobe.]
What happened to your face?
What happened to your arm?
The job.
Same.
[Gibbs smiles hands him a cup of coffee]
[Gibbs and Fornell are in autopsy with Ducky]
A mutual saving of a life is a powerful bond. [chuckles and points to Gibbs and Fornell] As evidenced by the two of you.
[to Gibbs] Oh, is that why we're friends?
It's more like shared misery.
God knows you've got enough to go around.
Hey! I'm a happy guy.
Since when?
You don't know what I've been doing. I haven't seen you in months.
Whose fault is that? You only call when you need something.
Well, apparently when I need grief.
All right, McNosy, what do you got?
From what I can gather, Gibbs and JoAnn Fielding are very estranged.
The woman lost her daughter and granddaughter. Now her fiancé died in her arms and her former son-in-law is investigating! Show some sympathy!
Maybe she's cursed! Like a Kennedy!
Minus the grassy knoll.
I heard about that! The shooter was really in the book suppository!
Depository.
That's what I said.
Ooh. It smells like a French whorehouse in here.
[referring to his new cologne] That's me.
What are you trying to do, Palmer? Raise the dead?
If Major Mass Spec were a guy, I would totally marry him and bear his little Mini Mass children.
You want to learn about being a real man, McGee, you've got to study the Japanese samurai. These guys are like Gibbs, with even bigger stones and less to say.
Is that even possible?
Aren't you hot?
[smirks] I've been told that before.
I'm talking about temperature!
Stop complaining. This is what winter feels like in Israel.
Well, we're not in Israel. We're in the good, old U.S. of A, my little immigrant friend, where we like to embrace central air, not melanoma.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's NCIS pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
