Nick Moon quotes from Mystery Science Theater 3000

...I am about to use this thing for scrap. We need something that'll stay on more than ten minutes at a time.

Those things still cost money, right?

Thing's older than I am.

Still works harder.

Says the drunk guy.

As I keep saying, I would happily work hard at the job I thought I was hired for.

Well I thought I needed a jaded barista.

We settled this. You're lucky I even hired you.

It helped that I was the only applicant.

Joel

Ooh, another LinkedIn success story.

Now what can I do for you miss...

Fontaine. Delilah Fontaine.

Miss Fontaine.

Call me Lilah.

So, Karen...

Leslie...

Sandy...

Any relation to Charles Fontaine?

He's my father.

Let me stop you there.

Tony.

I don't do missing persons.

I think you'll find this particular case to be of interest.

Look lady, as much as I'd like to help you, I can't find your old man. It doesn't matter how many zeroes you put on the check.

Because Nick don't do math.

You really don't have to do this, Nick. I can get a hotel room.

I do this for all my clients.

Yes, I see them under your bed.

Well, you know. All my attractive, single clients.

Oh, I get it. You're a pig!

What's The Stranger planning?

Joel

Stranger Things?

Well, he has the dagger, so use your imagination.

Hmmm... dragons.

That's all I know. Now can I go?

Sure, do you need your parking validated?

[after Nick startles her] I'm starting to see why you're single.

Pretty cool, huh?

[surprised] ... Wow.

Servo

Yeah, a real, live woman.

Pretty niiice!