Mean Rarity quotes from My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic

Spike

Come on, you guys! Let me in!

Rainbow Dash

[heading for the door] Sure thing, Spike.

[gets in her way] Heavens no! We're getting dressed!

Applejack

"Dressed"? Uh, beg pardon Rarity, but, uh, we don't normally wear clothes.

Oh, Fluttershy, would you be a dear and fly faster, please?!

Fluttershy

[whimpers] I can't!

Twilight

If you can't catch her, Discord wins!

Fluttershy

That. BIG. DUMB. MEANIE!

Fluttershy

We learned that you should take your friends' worries seriously.

Rainbow Dash

Even if you don't think that she has anything to worry about.

And that you shouldn't let your worries turn a small problem...

...into an enormously huge "entire town in total chaos, Princess has to come and save the day" problem!

[sniffs a glass of ashes] I didn't know you could burn juice.

I've been giving her lessons. I wouldn't be surprised if she got a Cutie Mark in fancy cooking by the time we get back from our vacation.

Vacation? Is that this week, as in, starting this very instant this week?!

Uhh, let me guess: apple sauce?

Sweetie Belle

Nope, toast!

Applejack

Bein' sisters is a give-and-take relationship. You've been doin' a whole lot of takin', but not a lot of givin'.

Of course I give! I give lessons, and reasonable demands-

Applejack

But you never give in. Bein' sisters is like... apple pie! You can have amazin' apples, and you can have a wonderfully crispy crust, but only together can you have a perfect apple pie.

[to herself] But apart, all we are is just a pile of mush and some crumbly, dry mess. [gasps] I know what I need to do! I just hope it isn't too late!

Very well then, what shall we write to the Princess?

Sweetie Belle

I'll start. "Having a sister is just about the bestest thing in the world. But it sure isn't the easiest."

I agree that being sisters is a wonderful thing, but it takes teamwork. Sometimes it's about compromising. Sometimes it's about accepting each others' differences. But mostly, it's about having fun together. Even if it means getting your hooves a little bit dirty.

Sweetie Belle

A lot dirty.

A little bit dirty.

Sweetie Belle

A lot dirty!

A little bit dirty!

Sweetie Belle

A lo --

Spike

Hold it, hold it! How about: a medium amount of dirty, not too little, not too much, just right?

Deal!

[at the formal and Twilight's party each time] Uhhh... I think I left the bathwater running in my suite. I really should go check on Opal. Is that Princess Celestia? I need to use the little fillies' room. Can I get anypony more punch? [exhausted] I... have to... go to do... the... thing... with the stuff... you know...?

Rainbow Dash

[at Twilight's party] Uh, what's with the croquet mallet?

[muffled] What cwoquet mawwet?

Rainbow Dash

Duh, the one in your mouth?

[drops the mallet, laughs nervously] Ooh, that croquet mallet!

Earth ponies are numbskulls!

Pegasi are brutes!

Unicorns are snobs!

Applejack

Now how in thunderation is one of them twins a pegasus, and the other one a unicorn?

Easy. My great-great-great-great grandfather was a unicorn, and Cup Cake's great aunt's second cousin twice removed was a pegasus. That makes sense, right?

Rainbow Dash

Aw yeah, just you wait! Once little Pound Cake gets his wings going, he'll be all over the place.

Twilight

And be careful around Pumpkin Cake.

Baby unicorns get strange magic surges that come and go.

Applejack

Sorry, Pinkie, but I can't tell y'all the truth! I just can't!

Well, I heard a "sorry" in there, so that’ll have to do for now. I’ll get a real apology later! [jumps off the cart] Rarity, catch me!

What?! Pinkie! [Pinkie Pie slams into Rarity on her cart, knocking them both off]

Twilight

Rainbow! Go back!

Rainbow Dash

No time! They knew what they were getting into!

Granny Smith

Good 'un. Bad 'un. Bad 'un. Good 'un.

Lovely. Horrid. Horrid. Lovely.

Twilight

Rarity, Pinkie, what are you two looking at?

Rainbow Dash! Isn't she the most daring devil- I mean devilish darer- I mean-

She's dazzling!

Oh yeah that's a good word. She's dazzling!

Fluttershy, what are you doing? That's no way to behave!

Fluttershy

Didn't you see what he did to new Fluttershy? And he thought new Fluttershy is a pushover!

No, sweetie, he didn't. We saw the whole thing. We think that you've taken your assertiveness training a little too far.

Fluttershy

What?! You just want new Fluttershy to be a doormat like old Fluttershy! But old Fluttershy is gone!

Pinkie Pie

New Fluttershy? Old Fluttershy?!

What happened to nice Fluttershy? We want that Fluttershy back.

Fluttershy

No, you want wimp Fluttershy. You want pushover Fluttershy. You want do-anything-to-her-and-she-won't-complain Fluttershy!

Pinkie Pie

Nyaaaaah! Too many Fluttershys to keep track of! Make it stop!

Fluttershy

Things getting too complicated for your simple little brain, Pinkie Pie?

[angrily] Now, stop right there! Let's not let things descend into petty insults!

Fluttershy

Why not? I thought 'petty' is what you're all about, Rarity. With your 'petty' concerns about fashion.

Pinkie Pie

Hey, leave her alone! Fashion is her passion!

Fluttershy

Oh, and what are you passionate about? Birthday cake? Party hats? [Pinkie retreats] I can't believe that the two most frivolous ponies in Ponyville are trying to tell new Fluttershy how to live her life when they are throwing their own lives away on pointless pursuits that nopony else gives a flying feather about!

Pinkie Pie

[in tears] Looks like nasty Fluttershy is here to stay!

[also in tears] I cannot believe what that monster Iron Will has done to you!

Fluttershy

Iron Will's not a monster, he's a minotaur! [she angrily sees her reflection on Rarity and Pinkie's tear puddle and comes to realization in tears] I'm the monster.

Old Pinkie Pie's not so sure New Fluttershy is such a good idea after all.

Old Rarity agrees.

Iron Will

What did you say?

Fluttershy

No.

Iron Will

Ohhh, I'd hate to be you right now, because Iron Will is gonna to rain down a world of hurt unless Iron Will gets his money pronto! [snorts]

Fluttershy

As I recall, during your workshop you promised one hundred percent satisfaction guaranteed, or you pay nothing. Well, I'm not satisfied.

Iron Will

What do you mean you're not satisfied?! Everypony has always been satisfied!

Fluttershy

Well, I guess I'm the first then. But since I'm not satisfied, I refuse to pay. It's as simple as that.

Iron Will

Ohh, are you... sure you're not just a little bit satisfied? B-because maybe... we could cut a deal. I-I mean we're both reasonable creatures, aren't we?

Fluttershy

I'm sorry, but no means no.

Iron Will

No means no, huh? Nopony's ever said that to me before. Huh... I gotta remember that one. That's a good catchphrase for my next workshop.

You were amazing, Fluttershy! You totally stood up to that monster!

In fact, you didn't change at all! You were the same old Fluttershy that we've always loved!

The one we missed!

Fluttershy

Don't worry, old Fluttershy's back for good. I'm sorry I took the whole assertiveness thing too far. Friends?

Friends.

[laughing]