[Monk is visibly uncomfortable as he watches Randy unloading hay bales off the truck for storage in the shed]
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I’m fine. It’s just, you know, everything. The earth and the outdoors. All the animals. Animal byproducts.
Well, you know, all the food you eat comes from farms just like this.
Not anymore. Not as of the last 23 minutes.
Well, I love it. I used to come up here every summer helping Uncle Harvey run the place. I still can’t believe it’s all mine. It’s all mine. It’s my farm. I own a farm. I’m the Farmer in the Dell. [Oates arrives]
FOFarmhand Oates
I got that tractor running.
FOFarmhand Oates
Since Tuesday.
But it’s working now? Good. Good. Good man, Oates.
FOFarmhand Oates
You feed the jerseys?
FOFarmhand Oates
They gotta be fed every day! Animals eat every day! I’ll do it. Jesus. [Starts to leave, but Randy stops him]
[Oates is outside on the porch, and looks up to see Monk handcuffing himself to the grain drill]
FOFarmhand Oates
Mr. Monk?
Oates? Oates! Thank, God! Where’s Randy?
FOFarmhand Oates
He’s asleep. I can’t help but noticing that you’re handcuffing yourself to that grain drill.
FOFarmhand Oates
I got you.
It’s gonna kick in any minute.
Here’s the thing. I can’t tolerate any drugs or medications. It’s my metabolism. I don’t know what…I don’t know what’s gonna happen to me. I might go berserk! I might hurt somebody. Oates, dude... here. Here. [Monk throws the handcuff keys to Oates] Listen, whatever happens, don’t unlock me. NO MATTER WHAT I SAY! Even if I’m begging you! Oh, my God. Here it comes! Oh, God! I think it’s starting!
FOFarmhand Oates
We’re talking about marijuana, right?
UH-OH! [Stands up, and starts shaking, and jumping around] RIVERDANCE! Oh! Oh! I can feel it! I’m getting hungry!
FOFarmhand Oates
Did you have dinner? Got some pecan pie in the fridge.
IT'S THE MUNCHIES! Oates, whatever you do, don’t put anything near my mouth!
FOFarmhand Oates
Can do! But I gotta say, you know, I’ve had some experience in this area, and I don’t think you’re stoned at all.
No! Oh, no! I SEE LIGHTS FLICKERING!
FOFarmhand Oates
Yeah. They’re fireflies. [The sprinklers start spraying water, and Monk gets drenched]
What was that? What was that?!
FOFarmhand Oates
It’s 8:00! Irrigation sprinklers. [Monk suddenly calms down]
Do they come on every night all over the property?
FOFarmhand Oates
Every night.
Oates. I know how he did it. I know how Belmont killed Randy’s uncle. Get me out of this.
FOFarmhand Oates
Okie doke. One minute you're hand-cuffing yourself to a piece of farm machinery, sobbing like a schoolgirl, the next minute you're putting all the pieces together like Sherlock Holmes. Which is the real Adrian Monk?
Yeah, I like to think that a man is made up of many different–
FOFarmhand Oates
I think it's the schoolgirl.
Yeah, you're probably right.
[Monk sneaks into Randy's bedroom and disguises his voice as the motivational CD Randy is listening to, after turning it off]
[In a low voice] Randy. You were right. Belmont killed your uncle.
[Cuts to the sun rising on the horizon. Randy walks to the kitchen, where Monk and Oates are waiting for him]
Morning. Any coffee left?
FOFarmhand Oates
Got a full pot. How’d you sleep?
Well, fine, I guess. [Randy goes to the fridge, and smells the cream] Ew, it’s sour. What kind of farm is this? We don’t even have any fresh cream! [He walks out of the kitchen. He slaps his head. Monk glances at him to see if Randy has figured out everything that was fed to him in his sleep]
Mosquito. So, fill me in, what happened on Belmont’s farm?
Not much to tell. It was a dead end. How, how about you? Any new thoughts on the case?
No. [Suddenly, Randy stops with a surprised look on his face]
No. It’s nothing. Wait! Wait. Wait a minute. Oh, my God. Oh my God! [Walks over and takes a figurine pig off one of the shelves] Oh, my God. Monk, call the sheriff. I think I solved the case.
Monk · 667 quotes
