[Al is sitting underneath a bed and is being "crushed" by several very large women on the game show "How Do I Love Thee".]
BBink
How'ya doing down there, Steve?
I can taste my spleen.
S2 E20Just Married... with Children
S2 E21Father Lode
So, what are you gonna do with the money, Al?
What I always knew I would.
(Al stands by the staircase and rattles his bills)
(Peggy and the kids come down the stairs sniffing the air and looking around)
Al, I heard a strange sound. What is it?
Family, I have an announcement. I have money.
(Al holds out the money)
(Peggy whoops and snatches the money from Al's hand)
S2 E22All in the Family
[Everyone but Al is singing "You Are My Sunshine."]
Just the boys.
BIBud and Uncle Irwin
Please don't take my sunshine away.
Just the girls.
KOKelly and Uncle Otto
You'll never know, dear...
You're not good enough for our family.
Yeah, I've never been up on a morals charge.
Ah, Peg, you were great last night. You did the one thing that many husbands want their wives to do: you were asleep when I came home and you were out of bed when I woke up. Is there anything I can do for you?
You can stop eating beans before bed.
Someone outside the family, right?
Actually, in Wanker County, no one's really "outside" the family.
Uh, what about that boy Jimmy who works at the feed store?
Yeah, I think he's family.
(Kelly's face twists in disgust as she sits back down near the kitchen table)
Uncle Irwin, are you gonna put your head in the salad bar again?
IUncle Irwin
Erm, if you're good.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Married... with Children pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.