You know what I'd do if my lover lost interest in me?
Sleep with his parole officer?
S10 E4Reverend Al
Like all other religions, we have a sacred obligation to make a lot of money and open our own theme park.
S10 E5How Bleen Was My Kelly
I've put all the family finances right here on this computer.
You put something I don't have into something I don't understand.
You know, that reminds me of our sex life.
That's putting something I have into something I don't like.
Mom, Dad, Bud: you will never guess what I got.
A better game would be guess what you haven't got. I'll take Virginity for $100.
Well, that's funny. Nobody will take yours for less than $1000.
S10 E6The Weaker Sex
When I felt that hairy hand go in my pocket, I naturally assumed it was Peg.
I think I got a way to put an end to all of this.
Well, if you got the tailpipe, I got the lips.
S10 E7Flight Of The Bumblebee
Wow, we must have gone back in time 'cause I'm experiencing déjà moo.
Now, that is a real man, not some high school football hero who got married and turned to mush.
Well, I guess it's true what they say: you are what you marry.
S10 E8Blonde and Blonder
What's Mr. Potato Head doing here?
Well, I don't know: you married him.
Not that Mr. Potato Head, the one that's actually worth something.
EEric
It's amazing how your looks can improve with nice clothes, contacts and $10,000,000.
Oh look, it's a bird, it's a plane, ... it's Mr Potato Head?
S10 E9The Two That Got Away
Nothing drowns your sorrows like a three-day binge at the Nudie Bar.
I would like to start with a genuine picture of the Loch Ness Monster.
My God, Al, that's horrific. What the hell is it?
A picture of Peg's mom in the bathtub.
S10 E10Dud Bowl II
Why are you doing this to me, Marcy?
Because God's on vacation and He wants me to fill in.
When a Bundy doesn't get what's rightfully his, he makes sure that no one gets it either.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Married... with Children pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.