Mad quotes

[carefully leaving the rocket with his leaps] This is one small step for... [farts] Oh, man! Houston, we have a poo-poo.

How did they get in my house?

Maybe they found the key under the mat.

There is no key under the mat.

Then it's probably that giant hole in your wall.

Batman

[pressing the snooze button on alarm clock] Five more minutes!

[shaking the present] Let me guess: more oil.

Actually, I was a child actor too.

Sure you were. We all were.

I was! I was in The Sixth Sense and a bunch of other movies.

Never heard of them.

What about A.I.?

You love the characters from Toy Story 3 but here are some rejected ones. Speak "N" Swear...

How do you spell "house?

How the (bleep) should I know?!

Mr. Couch Potato Head...

(yawning) You guys rescue Buzz.

Baby Never Stops Crying...

(to Slinky Dog) If we don't find Andy before tonight - ah, I'm sorry, (referring to the crying baby) this is just... does... does he really need to be here?

Bizz the Friendly Fax...

What are we gonna do, Bizz?

(buzzing)

And Private Space!

HAH! I need a personal perimeter of five feet by five feet!

Toy Story 3, so many characters... but not these.

Hey Oscar! Can you help us find a triangle?

Tell you what! Why don't you two try and go away so I can eat my lunch!

Hey, R2-D2! Get your hands off my grub! I like it like that!

A square!

Shut up kid!

I've eaten so many Krabby Patties, how will I ever regain my shape?

[sighs] That's better. [smiles]

Uh, I would actually like to get my jacket back. [Wall-E stuffs him in his body, turning it into a cube] Consider it a wedding gift!

Captain, considering the ship's currently, uh, floating in space, there's concern we may be lost.

Lost? Of course not. Our bearings: Second star to the left, straight on 'til morning?

Captain, we're approaching some sort of land beyond imagination!

Jack Sparrow? Is that really you? It's been forever!

My old friend, "Captain 2-Hands".

Wow. We do need to catch up!

♪ I wanna throw up, those kids are real rats ♪

This week at Toys "4" Brats, check out Baby Cutz-A-Lot.

(v.o.) That's gotta hurt.

LECTRO-Land playset.

(v.o.) Zowie!

Meat Farm.

(v.o.) Eww!

Skill Saw!

(v.o.) That's sharp!

And Play-Don't: Radioactive Gloop.

♪ So when you're swinging at kids, the way you're swinging at gnats ♪

The world's biggest rip-off!

[after Sabor-Toothed Sylvester tries to pounce on him] I tawt I saw a puddy tat!

AAAHHH--

Please! Nobody panic!

Who's panicking? This is just how we run. [screams]

Don't let him get me! I'm a one of a kind children's character.

(smashed into the shape of SpongeBob): OK. I see your point.

Uh oh. I'm getting out of here. (gets out of the trash can, revealing that he has shapely legs and everyone gasps) What, it's from my mother's side!

It's time for Sports O'Clock with your host, Skip Schwartz!

Skip Schwartz, everybody! Let's go over all of today's scores! 14! 31! 56! 11! And, you won't believe this, 47! Unbe-Schwartz-able! Fans, this week's guest is basketball superstar LeBron James. LeBron, who is the toughest team you ever played against? Thank you, LeBron James! It's time now for Horn and Sirens! (horn and sirens) Let's take a look at the highlight of the night. That's gotta be a record! And speaking of explosions, let's take a look at the College Game Explosion of the Night! (explosion sound) That's gotta leave a mark! That pain in your head could only mean it's time to Circle the Wagons! Experts, tell the world who's going to win the Big Game. John?

Well...

Steve?

I...

Ron?

Odds are...

Slick? You can't argue with Slick. Thanks for tuning in, sports fans! Until next time, I'm Skip Schwartz... (explodes himself)

Uhh, looking too happy again. Better work on that frown some more. What? A fox!

Ah, thanks. I think so too! [She put Kristen's hair]

Ahh!

[Whistles, clicks tongue]

Now I really have a reason to frown. Nope still not enough.

I’m the Backpack, the Backpack, the Backpack.

[very sick] I don't feel so well.

Hey, hey, hey! What are you doing--! [Dora vomits inside] I’m the Backpack, the Backpack, the Backpack, yeah.