Drowsy, I really appreciate you coming to help Stitch. He's been having such trouble sleeping lately. Stitch, someone's here to see you.
[Stitch looks down and Drowsy steps out from behind Lilo as she covers her ears]
[Stitch yawns and falls off the bed, hitting his head and falls into a deep sleep]
Thanks, Drowsy. OK, PJ, what we need is a prank that's really funny. Something bigger than glue but not as big as… Boom! Wee-ooh! Woo-ooh woo-ooh woo-ooh! OK? [notices PJ's not behind her] Hello? [PJ slides down the stair rail, holding a blueprint and hops into the kitchen] Wow! Look at all this! I don't know, PJ. This is pretty bad… But I suppose he does deserve it, huh? 'Cause he hates me, right? I mean, Stitch won't like it, but he's sound asleep.
[Gantu and 625 are watching a competition on TV]
Do you think Jenny will make it to the final two?
6625
Who cares? This show is lame! Everyone's such a sap!
What about Jack? He's just pretending to be a sap to increase his chance of winning!
6625
Oh... is that why you act like a sap? 'Cause it's not working. You're still a loser.
CComputer
Warning, Experiment 277 activated. [Gantu groans in frustration] Primary function: mine and enrich Snootonium.
Snootonium? There's no Snootonium on Earth. This experiment is useless. [Hämsterviel's contact interrupts the show] Hey, the TV!
TV, schmeevee! Get up off your enormously useless behind and go capture that experiment or I will cancel all your useless entertainment service!
[sighs] Yes, sir. I suppose I'll miss the big season finale.
6625
Want me to record for ya?
6625
Hey, what are friends for? Trust me.
[Victoria is afraid of Experiment 277, believing it's a vampire; Gantu appear]
No wonder the vampire exterminator didn't work on him. He's an experiment.
Give me the abomination right now!
Take it, please! I'd knew you'd fix the problem.
Victoria, you don't understand.
Come to Papa. [reaches to grab Snooty until Stitch bites his finger]
What's Stitch doing? That big guy's gonna take the vampire for us.
That little guy isn't a vampire. He's an illegal genetic experiment from another planet, like Stitch.
Yeah, sorry. I should have told you.
[Gantu to his ship returns after failing to catch Snooty]
6625
Catch anything? No, of course you didn't.
Please, not now, I sustained an injury.
6625
Know how I know you didn't catch anything? BECAUSE BIG H CUT THE CABLE!! THAT'S HOW!!!
He cut the cable? But what about--
6625
Your show? Sorry, didn't get it.
But-but what happened to Jack and Jenny? What will we do without television?!
6625
Well, Hämsterviel did let us keep one channel. [turns on the TV]
AAnnouncer
Coming up on The Sandwich Channel: The Mysteries of Mayonnaise.
[while Lilo finds out that Snooty sucks mucus from people, Victoria teams up with Gantu to capture Snooty; Pleakley drives Lilo and a drowsy Stitch to Snooty's mountain lair really slowly]
These are steep mountain roads. Safety first driving techniques demand that I take control of the vehicle at all times.
This thing flies, you know.
[gasps] Flying?! Through these jagged canyons?!
[Stitch pulls a lever, causing the buggy to fly off the road]
Flying?! Flying?! Can't keep the eye on the road when I'm flying!
[Victoria learns that Gantu was using her as bait to lure Snooty to him; she stops Gantu and sets Snooty free]
You were right, Lilo. He's not a monster at all. I should have trusted you.
You were kinda right, too. Snooty actually is a vampire. You know, a snot vampire.
No wonder he kept chasing me! My allergies! [Snooty leaps up to Victoria's face and sucks the mucus out through her nose] I can breathe!
Maybe he could come live with me.
He could keep my sinuses clear!
[starts the engine of the buggy] Ah-ha! Finally! [drives the buggy in reverse and crashes into Gantu's jet] I hope he had insurance.
[625 is channel-surfing as Gantu returns]
No, I didn't capture the experiment.
6625
Oh, hey, Gantu! Hi! You're home early, aren't ya?
625, that's not the sandwich channel. When did we get the cable back?
6625
Ah, y'know, just now. Right this second! Amazing coinkeydink, huh?
It was never out! You just said that so you could have it all to yourself!
6625
I always said you were a semi-intelligent species.
6625
Eh, you live, you learn.
[Nani is practicing for an interview with Lilo and Stitch]
As you know, I am a hard loyal worker. And I think I'm overdue for a raise, or a promotion, or maybe a raise and a promotion.
[imitates Mr. Jameson] Are you lolo?
Could you smash a brick with your bare hands?
The vice president of the hotel isn't gonna ask me that.
You have to be prepared for anything.
I am! Except for this hair! What time is it?
Don't worry. You have 20 minutes.
What?! I'll never make it!
[After her interview with the vice president, Nani runs into her junior high school friends, Ellen and Lona]
[excited] What are you doing here?!
We're on vacation, what else? We kept in touch unlike some people.
Sorry. High school was kinda lolo for me. You both look so great!
LLona
Well, you've sure got it goin' on, Ms. Vice President.
Yes. I'm surrounded by success stories. And to think, I only married well.
LLona
You managed to stay here in Hawaii! That's awesome, girl! I mean, I love LA...
But honestly, there's life beyond surfer boys and boogie boarding. Keep Kauai, just give me Park Avenue!
You live in New York? And in LA?
LLona
And you run this beautiful hotel. That must be a blast!
Oh, and Lana's and business, too.
Lona I just own a little cosmetics company. Allen's life is all that. Yachting around the world.
A yacht?! You have a yacht?!
Oh, please, it's a floating hotel, nothing to get all squishy about.
LLona
Oh, it's cool and you know it!
[after Ellen and Lona invite Nani and her family to Ellen's yacht for dinner, assuming she's vice president of the hotel, Nani tells Lilo and Stitch the truth]
So now they think I'm the vice president of the hotel. Isn't that hilarious?
Yeah, especially the part with your lying!
But they're all so successful! And I rent canoes!
Oh, they're lots of people in the world who wish they could rent canoes.
[Pleakley has Lilo, Stitch and Jumba formally dressed up]
Nani said it's supposed to be casual.
When yacht people say "casual", they mean "dress up". Trust me.
Then what do they mean when they say "dress up"?
Oh! When yacht people say "dress up"... I mean, wow! Gold crowns, mirrored sunglasses, leather capes, ruby slippers, I mean, they really dress up!
[after Retro turns Lilo, Jumba, Pleakley, Ellen, and Lona into cavepeople, Stitch captures him and finds the way to reverse the effect; Retro turns Ellen's yacht into a canoe]
The yacht, it's a canoe! Stitch, I can't afford to buy Ellen a new yacht!
[grabs Retro's tongue and then wraps it around the cavepeople, and then spanks Retro in the behind three times] One, two, three!
[Retro releases his tongue, turning Nani's friends and family back to normal]
And why are we drifting toward very sharp rocks?
And why is there ham stuck in my teeth?
[after the group makes it safety to shore..]
So, I'm sorry I lied to you guys. I guess I just wanted you to think I was doing something more important with my life than teaching people how to use one of these.
LLona
What are you talking about? Using one of these saved our lives!
I honestly don't care what you do for a living, Nani. At least you actually work.
LLona
We're just thrilled to see you, girl.
So you rent water sports gear.
LLona
Well, what are we waiting for?
LLona
Oh, come on, Ellen, we're on vacation!
Note: This is the first crossover episode to feature characters from American Dragon: Jake Long
[shapeshifts into Lilo] 316 can turn anyone… [then shapeshifts into Stitch] …into an exact duplicate of any other one.
