Florence Craye quotes from Jeeves and Wooster

Bertie Wooster

Jeeves!

Jeeves

Yes, sir?

Bertie Wooster

That parcel has arrived in London!

Jeeves

Yes, sir.

Bertie Wooster

Well, did you send it?

Jeeves

Yes, sir. [Bertie lets out a small scream] I acted for the best, sir.

Bertie Wooster

You do know that Lady Florence has broken off her engagement with me.

Jeeves

In my opinion, sir — and I'm sorry if this causes you any distress — you and Lady Florence are not ideally matched. Her ladyship is of a highly arbitrary and determined temperament, sir, quite opposed to your own.

Bertie Wooster

Oh, indeed, Jeeves! Well, I'm very grateful for your opinion! I must say that what I had in mind from you was abject, quivering apology! This is very sad, Jeeves, but I'm going to have to think very seriously about your future. I — [catches sight of Florence telling off two servants downstairs]

...I trust that is not alcohol I smell on your breath. Drunkenness may be de rigeur among the servants in some houses, but I should be sorry to see it take hold here.

My lady.

I suggest you read these. They're a brief introduction to the beliefs and aims of the Theosophical Society. Study them well! [hands a pamphlet to each servant, then exits]

Thank you, my lady.

Yes, Lady Worplesden.

Bertie Wooster

...Yes, well, I've thought seriously about your future, Jeeves, and I think it should continue very much in the vein of your immediate past. I owe you an apology, Jeeves.

Jeeves

By no means, sir.

[referring to Stilton] D'Arcy Cheesewright is an uncouth Cossack!

Bertie Wooster

Isn't that one of those things clergymen wear?

This is wonderful! What horrible people! Are all nightclubs like this?

Bertie Wooster

Ah, well, this is about average for the unlicensed places.

Unlicensed?

Bertie Wooster

You said you wanted somewhere low and garish.

Oh no, I'm not complaining. This is just the sort of place I pictured Rollo coming to that night!

Bertie Wooster

Rollo?

The hero of my novel. Rollo Beeminster. He's in a wild mood, reckless, desperate. He's lost the girl he loves, and he comes to this low nightclub trying to forget, but it's useless. He looks around him at the glitter and garishness and feels how hollow it all is.

Bertie Wooster

Yes. [clears throat] I saw Stilton at the Drones tonight.

Oh, yes?

Bertie Wooster

Yes, he was in a wild mood. He looked about him at the Drones' smoking room and I could see he was feeling what a hollow... smoking room it was.