Jackie quotes from Jackie Chan Adventures, page 3 ... TV Quotes Database

You did not make coffee this morning. Coffee is the only thing that is keeping Uncle’s ancient heart beating. You want dead Uncle?! No? Then you make coffee!

S1 E15 Unfinished Business

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UUncle

One more thing. You receive phone call from the university. They want you to translate parchments.

Jackie

Okay.

UUncle

One more thing. I cannot read these inscriptions. Very old writing. I must go in back to get my journals.

Jackie

Okay.

UUncle

One more thing. This is Jade, your niece. She will live with you for a year, okay?

Jackie

Okay. [shocked] I have a niece?!

UUncle

Your cousin Shen's girl from Hong Kong. Jade is not behaving well there; doing poorly in school. Your cousin thinks she will do better in America, with you.

S1 E15 Unfinished Business

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[After learning that Jade will live with him and Uncle for a year.]

Jackie

Nobody asked me!

UUncle

Did not want to bother you. Now, you both get acquainted while I go do work.

Jackie

But I don’t know anything about children! [Uncle leaves, leaving him alone with Jade] Uh, hello, I am Jackie. [Jade remains silent, staring at him.] Hmm, no English. [speaking in Chinese.] Ni hao ma? [translates to "How are you?"]

S1 E15 Unfinished Business

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[The Dark Hand Enforcers enter Uncle's shop.]

Jackie

Welcome to Uncle's Rare Finds! How can I help you?

FFinn

You're Jackie Chan, the archaeologist?

Jackie

Heh, I dabble in the study of past civilizations.

FFinn

Well, we are aware that you recently "dabbled" a shield from a Bavarian castle. Our extremely wealthy employer is interested in purchasing that shield.

[Jackie eyes the thugs suspiciously.]

Jackie

I’m sorry, I already donated that piece to the university.

FFinn

Really?

[The Dark Hand thugs try to break some antique vases as a threat, but Jackie stops them.]

It would be in your family’s best interests to undonate the shield, Mr. Chan. By this time tomorrow.

S1 E15 Unfinished Business

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[After the Dark Hand Enforcers leave the shop.]

UUncle

Did they buy anything?

Jackie

No.

UUncle

You are terrible salesman!

S1 E15 Unfinished Business

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[Jackie wakes up after being knocked unconscious following his fight with the Dark Hand Enforcers.]

Jackie

Augustus Black! What are you doing here? Ow, what am I doing here?

Captain Augustus Black: I’m afraid it’s official business my friend.

Jackie

I didn’t think these were your pack-up singers. Where have you been? I don’t hear from you for six years... Boom! You’re in San Francisco saving my butt. Oh, those thugs must've knocked me out.