Colonel Klink quotes from Hogan's Heroes

Major Hochstetter

Well, now, Klink, are you ready to hand him over to me?

Major Hochstetter! A new order is coming, a new order! One which will sweep vermin like you into the delousing station of history!

You are under arrest. Schultz!

Major Hochstetter

You are mad, Klink!

Take him away!

Schultz

Jawohl, mein Colonel! [Salutes Hogan]

[Shakes his head] Oh, Schultz, you idiot, you don't salute him, he's your prisoner! And see to it that it stays that way!

Schultz

[Salutes Klink] Jawohl, mein Kommandant!

And bring Carter back! Diiismissed!

Schultz

Colonel Hogan. What are we really going to do?

Hogan

Well, Schultz-

Schultz

Tell me nothing!

Why did you keep calling from a beer hall?

Schultz

Because there was a phone?

General Burkhalter

This is a most important and secret meeting.

I understand, General Burkhalter.

General Burkhalter

I doubt it.

General Burkhalter

"And, effective immediately, all military establishments on the home front will give senior non-commissioned officers command training, with full responsibility and authority." There it is.

I can't believe it. This order is insane, absolutely insane!

General Burkhalter

It is signed "Adolf Hitler".

Insane, yet, sane.

I have been appointed Haufman's defense council.

How did it happen?

I'm told I volunteered.

Colonel Hogan

What's your defense?

Since Colonel Houfman has served his country gallantly in the past, I will try for a smaller firing squad.