Count Blah quotes from Greg the Bunny

Blah

Gary Oldman. You ever see his Dracula? Bad hair.

Wow. Count Blah, can I just say that you scared the piss out of me. And I mean that from the heart, sir.

Blah

Please. You may call me Blah, blah.

Okay. Blah Blah.

Blah

No. Just Blah... blah.

Just... Blah Blah.

Blah

Blah! My boy, it is simple. Just Blah... blah.

Just Blah... Blah.

Blah

Look, don't turn this into a frickin' Abbott and Costello routine, okay? Just call me Blah, and leave it at that.

Gil

Guys, guys, can we just try and get this right, because the new boss from the network is here.

Dottie

Where'd she come from?

Gil

PBS.

Blah

Looks more like PMS, blah.

Dottie

You think I'm fat.

Blah

No, that's--that's Warren.

Would you like a fistful of gold, Liberace?

Blah

Oh, Liberace. Tough talk coming from Notorious P.I.G.

Jack

Well, there's your problem there. In fact, you got two problems. And they're both between his legs.

Blah

Eh, what? They look fine to me, blah. I wish mine looked that healthy. Mine hang so low, I need a cold shower before I can get on an escalator, blah.

While the paintball is designed to not break the skin, oh, they do break the skin. They cause pain, welts, and -- if'n you're not wearing your goggles -- a little something I call "painteye." I.e., blindness.

Did he just say, "blindness."

Blah

Yeah, blah. He also said, "if'n."

Jack

We're going to Greg's place. He needs our help.

Blah

Why, what's wrong, blah?

Jack

There's no time to explain.

Blah

Wait a minute. There's plenty of time to explain, blah. Greg's place is, like, 40 minutes away.

Alright, you're all such great actors -- why don't you act like you're putting your weapons down.

Blah

Jack, you were in 'Nam. What do you do when someone points a weapon at you, blah?

Jack

You spend three years in a bamboo cage.

Dottie

Oh, and by the way, guys, uh, Leo is a little quirky. He'd prefer it if you didn't talk to him too much.

Blah

Well, fine, the last thing we need is a disgruntled, singing postal worker, blah.

Alright, men, let's get a weapons check.

Jack

I got a wrench.

I got a rope.

Blah

I got a candlestick.

Jimmy

Guys, we're going to beat up Leo, not play Clue.

Uh, Gil, uh, the man is a genius.

Blah

Yes, clearly ahead of his time, blah.

Alison

Yeah, well, if he's ahead of his time, that doesn't do us any good now, does it?

Blah

Yeah, well, he's only about three weeks ahead of his time. So, uh, by the time the show airs, he'll be perfect, blah.

Jack

[singing] Many things are good to take, like a swim out on the lake.

Blah

[singing] Take a walk or take a hike. Take a ride on your new bike, blah.

Dottie

[singing] Take a train to New Orleans.

Jack

[singing] Take a look at my blue jeans.

[singing] Take my temperature when I'm sickly.

[singing] Relax, this will be over quickly.

Dottie

[singing] But never take what isn't yours in your grubby, little paws.

Jack

[singing] Greg, isn't that what you have done?

[singing] Come on, guys, this isn't fun.

Dottie

[singing] Taking something causing grief.

[singing] Admit it, Greg, you are a thief. Admit it, admit it, admit it, admit it, admit it, admit it...

Alison

Laura, have you interviewed Count Blah yet? He is such a talent, and so professional.

Oh, yes, if by professional, you mean stealing his entire act from a Sesame Street character.

Blah

That's a filthy lie! That son-of-a-bitch stole my bit, blah!

Alison

Blah and the--and the Count from Sesame Street have this, like, playful rivalry. I love when you do that. It's totally fake.

Blah

Fake, just like his accent. I'm from Romania. He's from New Jersey. And I'll tell you another thing about him. Yeah, he once showed up in an emergency room with 1, 2, 3 -- 3 gerbils!

Gil

I'm losing everything. Sandy and I are getting a divorce.

Blah

You're kidding. What happened?

Gil

Oh, you know, she says I spend too much time in the office. Uh, you know, uh, I'm not affectionate enough. Uh, I'm distant. Uh, I pat my fingers too much. You know, I'm cheap. Uh, I breathe funny. You know, I don't listen. Who knows what she's saying half the time.

Dottie

'Cause she always seems so sad.

Blah

Don't you mean cranky, blah?

Dottie

What about Cranky? We invited him.

Yeah, well, I ain't comin', ya bastards!