So, hairography-it works best when you pretend like you're being Tasered, so you just move your head around like you're spazzing and stuff. [demonstrates]
S1 E11Hairography
Sometimes it's hard to appreciate what a good singer you are because all I think about is shoving a sock in your mouth.
S1 E12Mattress
The best teachers don't give you the answers. They just point the way and let you make your own choices – your own mistakes. That way, you get all the glory, and you deserve it.
The Cheerios' photo's tomorrow; I want back on that squad.
Oh, is that what you want? Well, what I wanted was a head cheerleader who wasn't going to hoist her legs behind her ears in the backseat of the first station wagon she could jimmy open, throwing away any chance she ever had in life.
There's a stack of mattresses in the choir room piled as high as the empty hair gel bottles in the Dumpster outside your apartment.
Is there any reason you have a soiled mattress in your office, Will? Have you and the redhead become so sexually depraved that you have to commit your craven acts of adultery in between classes?
I'm very sorry, but Glee Club is over!
[to Will] It's over!
Based on my investigation, I am of the opinion that a yearbook photo would only fuel the flames of anti-Glee club terror.
S1 E13Sectionals
I've never told you guys before, but I'm a little psychic. I can't read minds or anything yet, but I do have a sixth sense.
Sue, the directors, both from the Jane Addams Academy and Haverbrook School for the Deaf, have informed me that you gave them the New Directions' set list.
You have no proof.
The set lists were on Cheerios' letterhead.
I didn't do it.
They say, "From the desk of Sue Sylvester".
Circumstantial evidence.
They're written in your handwriting!
Forgeries.
Sue, there is an orgy of evidence stacked against you!
Well, you've clearly made up your mind not to be impartial in this case.
Welcome to the Sue Sylvester Express. Destination: Horror.
[Finn is punching Puck. Will and Emma enters the room and Will separates Puck and Finn]
Hey, come on, come on. Get off him! Knock it off! Get off! Get off! Hey.
[to Puck] TELL THE TRUTH!
PPuck
Punk just walked in and sucker punched me.
Don’t play dumb– you’re too freaking dumb to play dumb!
Come on!
Who told you this, Finn?
Obviously, it was Rachel.
What? I didn't do anything.
Yeah, it was Rachel, but I want to hear it from you. I want to hear it from both of you.
Finn, just calm down.
NO! THEY'RE BOTH LYING TO ME! [to Quinn] Is it true? Just tell me– is it true?
[begins to cry] Yes. Puck is the father.
So, all… All that stuff in the hot tub… You just made that up?
PPuck
You were stupid enough to buy it.
[Finn attempts to lunge at Puck but is stopped by Will]
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
[sobbing] I am so sorry.
Screw this. I’m done with you. I’m done with… I'M DONE WITH ALL OF YOU! [kicks a chair and leaves the room while Quinn tearfully looks on]
S1 E14Hell-O
We're glitterati. I feel like Lady Gaga.
We are going to rule this school!
[Karofsky, Azimo and another football player approach Rachel, Kurt and Mercedes and splash slushies over them.]
Welcome to Loserville! Population: you!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Glee pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.