All right, who can tell me who Christopher Cross is?
He discovered America.
“Britney/Brittany” · Season 2, Episode 2
In this episode: Brittany Pierce (11), Will Schuester (6), Kurt Hummel (5), Rachel Berry (4), Santana Lopez (4), Finn Hudson (3), Sue Sylvester (3), Mercedes Jones (3)
There's a burgeoning Facebook campaign that has swelled to over FIVE members. Their ardent demand? That this week, at the fall homecoming assembly, the McKinley High School Glee Club perform a number by -- wait for it -- Ms. Britney Spears!
I don't want to do Britney.
Why no Britney, Brittany?
Because my name is also Britney Spears.
[Everyone looks at her.]
Wait, what?
What the hell is she talking about?
My middle name is Susan. My last name is Pierce, which makes me Brittany S. Pierce. Brittany Spierce.
I hope you all respect that Glee Club can remain a place where I, Brittany S. Pierce, can escape the torment of Britney Spears.
Can I just say you are the hottest dentist I've ever seen?
I get that all the time.
You can drill me any time.
I think I might be better at brushing and flossing if I could see myself in the mirror.
There you go, blue tooth.
I don't brush my teeth. I rinse my mouth out with soda after I eat. I was pretty sure Dr Pepper was a dentist.
This looks like the alien spaceship where I was probed.
Brittany, you have the worst teeth I've ever seen. You have cavities in every single tooth. It's got to be some sort of record.
Please don't pull out all my teeth. When I smile, I'll look like an adult baby but with boobs.
Can I have a blue toothbrush?
I'll give you a hundred toothbrushes.
Are you a cat?
Look, my dad's a doctor, which means I have a killer health plan. Now get up in my grill, 'cause Brits and I wants to get our anesthesia on.
You're really hot.
BBritney
You're sweet.
And your breath smells really nice.
BBrittney
So does yours. And you know why? Because this is a fantasy.
Wow.
I'm more talented than all of you. I see that clearly now. It's Brittany, bitch.
[slurred] Is this real life?
They're personifying you!
Objectifying.
[touching Jacob's hair] Your hair looks like a Jewish cloud.
[to Finn after Rachel walks away in her 'Baby One More Time' outfit] What do you want for her? I'll give you anything. I'll give you my house! I'll kill my parents and I'll give you my house!
Well, congratulations. Normally you dress like a fantasy of a perverted Japanese business man with a very dark specific fetish but I actually dig this look. Yay.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Glee pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.