Otae quotes from Gin Tama

Otae

Does a child need a reason to protect something his parents loved?

Otae

'I love you a pile'? What the hell does that mean?

Otae

I’m Otae. Please do as you wish with me.

Amanto

That’s not it! You have to give us more cleavage, dammit!

Otae

[grabs the Amanto by the mouth] I’ve never had cleavage.

Amanto

Oh sorry. You couldn’t do it if you wanted, huh?

Otae

You really did come back!

Gintoki

It was tough. It was tougher than I thought it would be.

Shinpachi

Please try harder…you didn’t even last a minute!

Gintoki

Idiot, even one minute would’ve been too much!

Kondo

If your boyfriend...what if he were impotent?

Otae

Then I'd love him, impotence and all!

Kondo

[thinking] She's so calm. She just accepts it, like the Buddha! [out loud, to Otae] Let's do it at the altar!

Otae

He was so insistent, I got a little carried away, and gave it to him straight in the face, and he ran off.

Shinpachi

Is that so? I wanted to see what kind of a guy he was...

Kondo

[up a telephone pole] Otae-san! Otae-saaaaaaaaan! Marry Meeeeee! I won't give up after being turned down once or twice! Woman want to be loved more than they want to love!! My mom told me so!

Hey! What are you doing so early in the morning? You're bothering the neighborhood! Get down here, you bastard!

Kondo

Please officer, calm down. I'm...I'm a thief, yes, but a thief...of love!

Otae

Ok.

Shinpachi

Well, my sister's omelets are more like briquettes than anything else...

Kondo

I'm very athletic. I like tennis and scuba diving, you see...

Otae

Decide on one, you damned degenerate!

Otae

[holding Gintoki's arm lovingly] He's my fiancé. I'm getting married to him in the fall.

Gintoki

Is that so?

Otae

We've already done this and that together, so give up on me.

Kondo

This, that, and the other thing??

Shinpachi

Well, they haven't done that other thing...

Gintoki

All right then. Let's go you guys...

Kagura

[strangling Gintoki from behind] I misjudged you! I thought you were an honorable samurai!

Shinpachi

[kicking Gintoki] Are you proud of yourself, you damn dirty cheat?!

Gintoki

Come on, I protected your sister. Don't be like..

Kagura

I'm going home. Don't ever show your face to me again!

Shinpachi

I'm taking a leave of absence!

Otae

Painless, eh? Well, it looks like Gin-san's the one in the most pain, in the end...

Gintoki

This is really the worst pain ever...

Otae

We already have one useless, pubescent boy living here, so taking on another would be…

Shinpachi

What do you mean, “useless”? And this is a dog!

Gintoki

[wearing a pink apron] Afternoon…it’s Cooking Today…

Otae

Today’s menu is omu rice! It’s popular with the oldest grandmothers and the youngest children! Right, sensei?

Gintoki

I hate children. Besides, why do I have to cook for other people anyway?

Otae

[pointing a knife at Gintoki] Let’s skip the extra talking, and get with the cooking, sensei.

Otae

Let’s begin with the chicken rice. Sensei, where do we start?

Gintoki

Kagura, cut the vegetables. Slice them into small pieces.

Kagura

Got it! [slices the onion, and table, into pieces with her hands]

Shinpachi

Hey! Now what will we do?

Kagura

I definitely sliced it into small pieces.

Gintoki

You’re supposed to cut vegetables this way. Oi! [throws an onion in the air and dices it with his bokuto] Yep, that’s how it’s done.

Shinpachi

Hey! No way can people cut onions with a bokuto!

Gintoki

It’s all in the mind! The mind! Not just cutting onions—you can do anything with the mind!

Otae

Um, sensei, since the show started, you’ve just thrown in ingredients. Aren’t you going to explain what you’re doing?

Gintoki

It’s all right. Don’t worry. All these should be easy to do.

Otae

But we’re running a cooking show, after all. It’s pretty abnormal not to explain clearly what’s happening…

Gintoki

Well, when men cook, it’s always like this. If you just follow what I do, then…[sudden cut to a finished dish]

Otae

The dish is finally ready.

Shinpachi

When did you add the noodles??