Kagura quotes from Gin Tama

What kind of spirit could it be, gorilla?

It got him too!

Kagura

Well... Factory supervisor.

[Gintoki punches Kagura]

Yeah, well... It's the spirit of a factory supervisor who died when he was caught on a conveyor belt!

Uh... But all our men said they saw a woman.

He put it wrong. It's the spirit of a woman who committed suicide, and who looked like a factory supervisor who died when he was caught on a conveyor belt!

That's too complicated! Besides, what kind of factory supervisor haunts people?

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Yamazaki

Uh, how will you do the exorcism?

By getting rid of you.

Yamazaki

What? Anybody could do that!

[Kagura punches him in the gut, knocking him unconscious.]

Yes! It's in! The spirit's in him now!

The way I see it, it looked more like a body blow than a spirit.

Kagura

[pretending to be the spirit by manipulating Yamazaki's unconscious body] No, you're wrong, I'm in here! Well, everyone, it was entirely my fault that the factory...

Heyyy! Isn't that the factory supervisor?!

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Kagura

[drops Yamazaki] Ehh, what was it again?

You dummy! It was supposed to be a woman who died on a conveyor belt!

Why does it have to be a woman who died on a conveyor belt? In a conveyor belt... hmm...

Whatever, we'll just do any woman.

Kagura

No way! It's easy to say "any woman", but it's harder to give her life!

Nobody's gonna care if you're convincing or not!

Kagura

Shut up, mummy-man! Your costume isn't any convincing anyway!

What? It's more mysterious like this!

[they start fighting.]

Hey, cut that out! We're in the middle of work here, you hear me?

[their disguises fall apart as Kondo, Okita and Hijikata watch.]

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Kagura

Gin-chan, I feel like my head's going to explode. Help me.

Oi! This brave girl's head is going to explode! Are you really alright with that? That way, the anime's gonna end!

[turns to the camera] Coming up next, "The Shinsengumi's Bloody Records". Stay tuned, everyone.

That means we're done for.

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We could cut you up, but we have no time for that right now. Buzz off.

Oh? I think you don't wanna hurt us because you're afraid of ghosts, right?

Kagura

Poor fella, you want me to walk you to the bathroom?

Are you mocking the samurai?? [to Kagura] Please, walk me to the bathroom!

You're actually asking them??

Actually, I'm so afraid of going to the bathroom I was holding it in.

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[everyone hears Kondo scream upon seeing the woman in the red kimono.]

Kagura

Gorilla, what's wrong? Did you get your skin snagged in the zipper?

Kagura, what's wrong?

Kagura

He got his skin snagged in the zipper.

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Hijikata-san, that guy is... Huh?

[Hijikata is trying to climb into a pot.]

Hijikata-san, what are you doing?

Nothing. Just looking for an entrance to the Mayonnaise Kingdom.

[everyone stares blankly, then leaves.]

Wait, wait, wait! That's wrong! He may be afraid of ghosts, but I'm not!

You're the one who's scared! You probably wanna run home to mommy!

Kagura

Yeah, yeah, we get it. Doesn't matter if it's in the Continent of Mu or in the Mayonnaise Kingdom, just go and look for them.

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[after the woman in the red kimono is revealed to be a mosquito hybrid alien.]

Aw, geez. I don't care if it's a ghost or a mosquito, she sure caused a lot of trouble.

It was you who caused me trouble. I said I wouldn't pay for it, so get the hell out.

Hey, did you forget it was my move that finished all of this?

What are you talking about? It was my move before yours that clinched it. Even if you weren't around, I'd be fine.

Pretty tough talk coming from someone who was afraid of death. It would be quite a joke if the one they call the "Vice-Commander from Hell" was afraid of ghosts.

I wasn't scared, just ghost-hunting. Don't get me wrong. You, on the other hand, got scared to near death.

I was just pulling your leg. Actually, I have fun with that sort of thing. If I'm ever bored, how 'bout we have fun again?

[Kagura opens the door behind them.]

Kagura

Gin-chan, it's time to go... Huh? [the deck where Gintoki and Hijikata were sitting is empty now. She looks down and sees they are both hiding beneath the deck.] What are you guys doing?

GHGintoki and Hijikata

Nothing. I just lost my contacts.