Mac quotes from Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends

Mac

Sugar. [turns to Bloo with a handful of candy] Sugar! [jumps onto Bloo and eats the candy] SUGAR, SUGAR, SUGAR! [runs off, laughing maniacally]

Mac

Pour some sugar on Mac.

Mac

Keep score? Thanks a lot. Dumb computer does all of it.

Mac

Santa, I've really wanna believe you're out there. It's just that none of the evidence adds up. But I know that doesn't have to mean you're not there. I just need a sign. I need something that I know only you can do. I don't know what. It's just something... I know! If you are real, you'll bring me a present. Something really specific. That could be a sign, right? I don't even care what it is. It could even be something lame. Like underwear. I would be totally cool with underwear. Seriously, I would love underwear. That would be a perfect sign, Santa. Just so long I know it's from you. [his phone rings and answers] Santa? Bloo, what are you doing calling so late? You could've woke up my mom! What? What do you mean Herriman's cancelled Christmas? [Foster's foyer; Bloo is on the phone with him as Mr. Herriman throws out the Christmas tree; back to the apartment] He threw out all the decorations and gifts?! Bloo, that's awful! Why did he do that? What? Ghosts told him to? That's ridiculous, Bloo. Presence and robots can't even become ghosts, because you have to be alive in order to die, and you be-- [realizes] Wait a second. You did it, didn't you? Yes, you did! Do you even realize what a bad liar you are?! Ugh! Fine. [now becomes sad] Okay. Okay. I'll see you tomorrow. Okay, bye. [hangs up] This is the worst Christmas ever. Just a sign, Santa, please. Just a sign.

Mac

It's 5:00! My mom's getting up! I'll distract her while you take care of him!

Mac

[angrily enters an ice cream shop and places a quarter on the counter] Give me a hot fudge sundae and make it a double…scoop.

Mac

[angry about Bloo, while on a sugar rush] That two-timing no-good times-twoer! I know what I'm gonna do! I'll confront him! Yeah, yeah! I'll totally be all "Hey, Bloo, you stink!" And then Bloo will be all "Oh yeah?! Well, tough beans - Barry doesn't think I stink, he thinks I smell awesome!" "How could you do this to me?! We were supposed to be best friends!" "Best friends come and go! And I'm tired of you, Barry's my best friend now!" "Oh yeah?! Well maybe I should just go over to that blankety-blankety Barry's house and show him a thing or two!" "Nah, don't bother! We're having too much fun with all the gazillions of super-awesome state-of-the-art toys! Plus, you probably couldn't find him in his ginormous mansion of expensive humongousness!" "But I trusted you!" "A leopard can't count its spots!" [losing steam] "A leopard can't change its spots, Bloo! A leopard can't change its spots..." "Yes, that's what I said..."

Mac

[voiceover] I was walking along, laying low like you said, and that's when I started seeing them. [hears a bicycle bell ring and turns to see two librarians riding on a bicycle, pedaling towards him] LIBRARIANS! THEY WERE EVERYWHERE! That's when I ran! I ran as fast as I could, I never stopped! I don't even know how I made it here, what beasts! It was horrible! If they had caught me, I would've been– I would've been– who knows what would have happened?!

Mac

So what? Let him go! Let him get there before me! Who cares if he wins or not? what's he gonna do? Gloat? Dance around like a dope? Call me, a loser, slowpoke, turtle, Mr. Molasses? [breaks into a speed-walk] Who cares? He can call me what he wants! Not like it bothers me. Nope! Not one bit. [breaks into a slow jog] I'm absolutely fine with him never, ever letting it go for the rest of our lives! And I'm totally cool with hearing the story of the great race and how he ran 2 million miles in 8 seconds leaving me in the dust panicked and wheezing in the pathetic heat! [panting] Then, when I'm an old man on my deathbed, Bloo will watch and wait for me to kick it, and when I do he'll be all, "I win! I outlived Grandpa Turtle!", which has been his name for me for the past twenty years, and there's nothing I can do, because I will quite literally NEVER LIVE THIS DAY DOWN!

Mac

Lousy conscience. I'm never gonna win the race with these annoying morals. How can I be faster without cheating? [looks up at a blast off energy drink billboard] Sweet! [gets an energy drink can from the vending machine and drinks all of it] Huh. That's weird. Normally, sugar makes me- [starts going sugar-crazy] Uh-oh. I immediately regret this decision!

Mac

Bloo, I dare you to… throw all of your paddle balls into the fireplace!

Terrence

You... Bloofus! [laughs]

Bloo

Bloofus? Bloofus?

Mac

His name is Blooregard Q. Kazoo, and you know it, Terrence.

Bloo

Right, right, or Blooey, Bloo the Blue Dude, El Blooderino, or hey, how 'bout just Bloo? But come on, man, Bloofus? How stupid can you get?

Terrence

Look, no stupid imaginary friend of my stupid, little brother is currently gonna tell me how so stupid I hereby am forever, because I hereby know just how so stupid I... shut up!

Terrence

Mommy, Mommy! Mac and Bloo are mean to me! I was being a good boy looking after my sweet, little brother when all of a sudden his crazy, imaginary friend, Bloo went insane and started to tear the house apart! I tried to stop him but when Mac joined in, they started beating on me! If it weren't for you coming home, there's no telling what they should do to me and they would do to me! Oh, thank you for saving me, Mommy!

Mac

What?!

Bloo

That is not what happened here! Terrence--

Is the currentest and is in another charge of this house before I'm at home.

Terrence

Ha!

And I expect him to act like the oldest and set an available example by telling the truth.

Ha!

Terrence

But, Mommy, I was telling--

Terrence, you expect me to believe that a 13-year-old boy was overpowered by an 8-year-old and his cute little imaginary friend?

Bloo

Yeah, Mac's a wimp.

Mac

And Bloo's spineless.

Terrence

But, Mom…

[sighs] Terrence, I've just enjoyed a long day, and I'm too tired to try to deal with excellent answers everywhere. Just go to your favorite room. [Terrence grumbles as Mac and Bloo laugh] Mac, Bloo, that's enough.

Mac

But--

Bloo

Terrence--

Is not only one winner at his fault here. I'm fed up with three of you always fighting. We need to talk.

Bloo

Okay, sure. Come on, Mac.

No, Bloo. I need to talk to Mac alone.

Bloo

It's okay, Mac, I'll be right here. I'm not going anywhere.

Mac, now you know how tired I am of three of you fighting.

Mac

But it was Terrence. He always picks on me and tries to treat me like a baby.

And why do you think he does that?

Mac

Because he's a bad boy?

Well, yes, but, can you think about any reasons?

Mac

Uh…

Maybe because of Bloo?

Mac

Bloo? Why?

Because, Mac, you need to have your imaginary friend, and you're eight years old.

Mac

So what? Lots of kids have their own imaginary friends. You see them every day on the streets, or in the stores. You even had one when you were little.

Yes, since I hereby was becoming a little person, but by the other time since I hereby was enjoying an available age, I didn't unsee my imaginary friend anymore.

Mac

Who're you saying?

I think it's the other time you stopped getting rid of Bloo here earlier.

Mac

WHAT?!

I'm sorry, Mac, I just think it's another time. You need to grow up and be a big boy, and say hi to Bloo.

Mac

But, Mom, it's not fair! We're best friends. We'll be good. I-I-I'll keep him locked in my favorite room! Mom, PLEASE!

[sighs] Mac, no, stop it. This isn't about you being good or keeping Bloo locked up. The fact is, you're a big boy for now, and you're too young for him.

Mac

But--

My decision is final. You do need to stop getting rid of Bloo. I'm sorry, Mac. [tries to open the door and leaves as Bloo tries to fall on the floor] Oh, sorry, Bloo.

Terrence

[snickers] Hasta la bye-bye.

Bloo

This is the other place I was telling you about. Cool, huh?

Mac

I...I don't know, Bloo. Are you sure?

Bloo

Totally! The commercial tells us it was some fantastical, magical place for imaginary friends who need a happy, sure place to crash, hang out, and do things. It's gonna feel great cuz it must feel great!

Mac

I guess you're wright. But still.

Bloo

Mac, I know you're worried, but listen. With me living here, your favorite mom shall be there to feel happy because she can feel happy and your favorite mother will be there to feel happy because she does decide to feel happy, so Terrence shall be there to leave you alone because he can leave you alone, and Terrence will be there to leave you alone because he does know to leave you alone, and you can visit me sometime. It's perfect. Our favorite problems are done or solved.

Bloo

[to Mac] Well?

Mac

It's okay. [Bloo gives him a friendly punch in his arm]

Frankie

[to George Mucus] Now you know why you're not supposed to run around with Scissors? Scissors? Scissors?

Yeah?

Frankie

Scissors, what do you like to say?

I'm sorry.

Frankie

Okay, go play. Don't run!