Susan Lewis quotes from E.R.

Susan

I thought nurses were supposed to be angels of mercy?

Chuny

Even mercy has a price.

Abby

Well, I never meant to quit med school forever, and it seemed like the right time to come back; I only have one year left.

Susan

Where'd you get the money?

Abby

Begged, borrowed, threatened my ex-husband.

Susan

Good for you! [laughs]

[about a patient] She needs a little TLC and maybe some Zoloft.

Susan

That makes two of us.

Abby

[about Neela] I'm beginning to hate her.

Susan

She's a med student.

Abby

I'm a med student.

Susan

You know, now that you mention it, she's pissing me off, too. Come on, let's hate her together!

Susan

[after Dr. Romano's robotic hand grabs Sam's butt and she unhooks it from its socket] What are you doing?

He just grabbed my ass. [gives the hand to Lewis] Here, take this to church and have it exorcised.

Romano

That's right, you keep walking! Right up to the nursing director's office 'cause by the time you get there, there'll be a pink slip waiting for you.

Good! Give me plenty of time to file my sexual harassment lawsuit!

Romano

Do you mind?

Susan

Yes, I do. You can have it back by the end of the day if you learn to behave!

Romano

Give me my damned hand back!

Romano

Do I need to remind you that I'm in charge here?

Susan

You'll have to convince me first.

I've got a rule against ass grabbing.

Susan

That's a good rule.

Susan

I thought that you were on that chopper.

God, no. They brought their own nurse, and that bitch wouldn't let me fly.

Susan

That bitch saved your life!

Susan

[about Chuck] He's intubated with a central line. Who did this?

Abby

If you sign here, we can say you did.

Susan

[about Neela] She'll be a star in internal medicine or research, something using your intellect, but she's not an ER doc.

Carter

Since when did intellect become a liability to working in the ER?

Kerry

There was a memo while you were in Africa.

Susan

It's so sweet seeing them growing up.

Jerry

Who? Babies?

Susan

No, men.

Susan

I'm here because I want the ER chief job.

Kerry

But you turned it down once already.

Susan

That was pre-baby. Turns out I like kids better when they're not sucking the life force out of me.

Susan

[at the Jumbo Mart] One large coffee and a first-year resident, please.

Neela

Sorry?

Abby

Howard quit.

Neela

He did?

Susan

Yeah, are you interested?

Abby

Well, Neela's going through this delayed adolescent rebellion slash premature midlife crisis thing right now.

Susan

Look, I've called the NRMP, I have scraped the bottom of the barrel, I have seen or spoken with more freaks that Dr. Phil. I am desperate, no offense, for anyone even remotely competent and/or sane.

Neela

I don't know, I mean, I'm-I'm working now so...

Susan

Yeah, you're right. You just keep ringing up those pork rinds and making Icees.

Susan

Jing-Mei, I am sorry about your dad. I really am, but I keep cutting you breaks.

Chen

I know, and I appreciate it. This'll be the last time.

Susan

Oh, man. There is no way I can get anyone to cover tonight. It's impossible.

Chen

Susan, please.

Susan

I hate to be hardcore, but I can't.

Chen

Look, can you stay?

Susan

I have a baby and a guy who's been watching him 24/7. And I just worked a 14-hour shift. No, I can't.

Chen

Well, maybe Carter can handle it. He's got Abby and Morris.

Susan

We're inundated with homeless from the city roundup.

Chen

I know.

Susan

We're already understaffed. Jing-Mei, please. You have to understand.

Chen

I do. It's okay.

Susan

Good. Thank you.

Chen

I'm sorry, Susan. I quit.

Susan

Chen just quit. Where's Carter?

Pratt

Quit what?

Susan

The hospital. Where's Carter?

Pratt

Trauma 2, I think. Quit for good? Is she alright?

Susan

She's burnt out. We're screwed.