Webby Vanderquack quotes from DuckTales (2017)

Scrooge

[looking at the casino directory map] Ah, ugh. I can't make sense of this. Where's the exit?

Webby

Is that "X" hidden treasure?

Huey

The "X" is obviously where we are, but where... are we?

Webby

Sorry, sir, but the only thing we're hungry for is adventure, and- IS THAT A FOUNTAIN MADE OF CHOCOLATE?!

Liu Hai

You can dip positively anything in it.

Webby

Strawberries?

Liu Hai

Mhmm.

Webby

What about my hand?

Liu Hai

Sure.

Webby

What about your hand?

Liu Hai

Um, uh, fine.

Webby

[as Louie indulges himself in the treasure room] You should really leave that alone. Basic rule of treasure hunting, if it might be cursed, don't touch it.

Louie

You said you weren't sure what the prophecy meant.

Webby

No, but I am sure it said the golden reward is for those who serve Toth-Ra.

Louie

I am serving him, by cleaning up. This place is a mess of treasure!

Louie

Ooh! What's in this weird jar, huh? [takes off the lid, looks inside, and finds something disgusting; gagging] Do not look in those jars!

Webby

[looks inside the jar] Ooh, a kidney!

Huey

That's it! I'm putting my foot down! We can't go forward.

Scrooge

Oh, of course we can. The summit's right there.

Huey

We are violating every rule of my Junior Woodchuck training! We're out of supplies. It's starting to get cold, so even if we make it to the top, we'd freeze to death before we get down! Oh, and we keep trying to go up this way, the whole thing is going to come crashing down! This is all too risky!

Scrooge

Don't you go ninny on me, lad! You'll never get your cartography badge with that attitude!

Huey

I don't care! We have to turn around, now!

Now!

Huey

You already beat Mallardy. Isn't that enough?!

Scrooge

No! We'd be daft to give up with the peak in our grasp.

Huey

It's not giving up, it's just having common sense.

Scrooge

For the last time, nothing bad is going to happen.

Dewey

[as he and Webby battle a sea monster] You hideous monster! I will avenge my mother by killing you with the very spear you're sworn to protect!

You shall never get the Spear of Poseidon!

Dewey

I'm sorry, the Spear of who, now?

The Spear of Poseidon!

Dewey

Man, we got the wrong chamber again!

Webby

We're looking for the Spear of Selene.

Ohhh, huh. [sets them down] You're gonna wanna go back down the hall, past the Harpy Aviary, third door on your left. Garden of Selene. Can't miss it.

Webby

Oh, hey thanks!

Dewey

Sorry about calling you a hideous monster before. I'm sure you're very attractive by sea monster standards.

Not really. Thanks though.

Dewey

So where's the Spear of Selene, Selene?

What spear?

Dewey

The one Della took from your garden.

You mean the Sphere of Selene?

Dewey

Why does no one get what I'm saying? The Spear of Selene!

I've never had a spear. Do you mean the Sword of Selene? That's down the hall-

Dewey

No! The Spear of Selene! The one my mom took! The one that's our only clue to finding her!

Ah, you're Della's kid! I shoulda realized, you're just like her. I'm sorry, I haven't seen her in years, and I don't know what the Spear of Selene is.

Dewey

So we're back to "she stole Scrooge's spear and betrayed the family" then. Great.

What? No way. She loved her family more than anything in the world. Oh, Della wasn't just a good person, she was the greatest, and she made everyone around her better.

Webby

Maybe the spear isn't an artifact. Maybe it's something else.

Your mom did love a good mystery. [gives Dewey her Sphere] Here. It's not a spear, but it is a treasure even Della never found. Don't give up, young duck. Your mother never did.

Huey

Welcome back to the Billionaire's Club Classic, where in a bizarre turn of events, the players have become trapped in some sort of mystical faerie realm.

Launchpad

For more, we go to two tiny horses.

Huey

What are you- ah!

Greetings! We're Briar, and Bramble, the keepers of this realm.

Webby

Talking animals wearing clothes?!

Dewey

Oh, no, did we die? Are we in Webby heaven?

Dewey

What's all this?

Webby

Hey, guys! Every year I brush up on my survivor skills on a secret island! [Beakley clears her throat] I-I mean, a regular island where young warriors definitely don't combat the forces of nature and each other. You know, it's girl stuff.

Donald

[quacking in panic] I GOTTA GO! [gets into his car and drives off]

Huey

Why is everyone running off?

Beakley

[sighs] You would figure it out sooner or later. [whispers] Today is Mr. McDuck's birthday.

Huey

Okay, people, we are in crisis party planning mode! Louie, you start a guest list. Dewey…

Beakley

[interrupting] Absolutely not. Mr. McDuck has a strict no-birthday-party rule. He hates the reminder that he's…

Louie

Literally the oldest person he knows?

Huey

But our most epic relative deserves the most epic party ever!

Webby

Oh, I don't know. He hasn't had a good one since before his old butler, Duckworth died.

Huey

Like this stuffy old guy could beat the party I threw for the Junior Woodchuck Party Planning Committee. It was both work and play.

Beakley

[walking out the door] Fine. Don't say I didn't warn you.

Webby

[catching up] If I don't come back, tell my story!

Huey

Nah, he's gonna love it! Huey's time to shine!

Webby

Lena, I've found something. According to this, to stop an enchanted force, you must remove its power source, or beat it with a stronger magical totem. We can use our friendship bracelets! Friendship is the greatest magic of all!

Lena

That's... not how magic works.

Webby

Wait, where are Huey and Louie?

Dewey

Who?

Webby

Um, your brothers?

Dewey

Uh, Webby, I don't have brothers. I'm an only child.

Webby

Don't be ridicu- [gasp] Oh no! We must be in some sort of dystopian alternate dimension!

Dewey

Calm down, everything is fine.

Webby

Exactly what an evil Dewey-doppleganger would say! [tackles Dewey] Give it up, Dew-pelganger! Where is Dewey?!

Huey

Webby, stop! That is Dewy!

Louie

He's just doing a Dewey thing!

Webby

Oh. [lets go of Dewey]

Dewey

[to Huey and Louie] Thank you, good Samaritans. You restored my faith in the kindness of random strangers.

Huey

Not even one hour in, and your stupid "Only Child Day" has already almost gotten one of us killed.

Webby

Only-what-now?

Dewey

It's a beautiful holiday!

Huey

That he made up.

Dewey

Where for a whole day, we get to be sibling-free and do all the amazing things that an only child gets to do! Make our marks on the world!

Louie

Not have to answer to anyone!

Huey

Be horribly alone?

Dewey

For once!

Dewey

[after Webby crawls out of the Security-bot] How did you get in there?

Webby

Oh, I just jammed it open and ripped out a bunch of wires to make room. What were you doing?

Dewey

[nervously] What? Me? Nothing! [closing the closet door, the light fades on the Louie Lamp; impersonating Louie's voice] She knows. [to the lamp] Shut up, Louie!

Scrooge

Great sacks of delirium!

Webby

Maybe Donald tried to make an omelet again?

Scrooge

Impossible. He still hasn't figured out how to get out of the pantry.

Scrooge

What is it now?

Webby

Should we have a battle cry to strike fear in our enemies?

Scrooge

What do you have in mind?

Webby

[to the cave] Get ready to lose bad, baddies!

Scrooge

... Eh, what she said.

Webby

I can't believe I'm now part of an actual McDuck-Agent 22 adventure! Thank you, Mr. McDuck!

Scrooge

Call me Uncle Scrooge.

Webby

[hugs Scrooge] I'm Webby.