Huey Duck quotes from DuckTales (2017)

Huey

[as the Demon Dog claws at the door] We need a distraction! [grabs the bag from Dewey]

Dewey

Hey, give it back!

Huey

[emptying the bag's contents on the ground] Louie, hold the door open! I'll set the scarf on fire and throw it out as a decoy!

Dewey

[taking the scarf away] No! You can't!

Huey

What is wrong with you?!

Louie

Why are you being super weird?! This is a bad time to be weird!

Dewey

... Because it belongs to mom!

Huey

How do you know this is mom's?

Dewey

I've, uh, kinda been researching her on my own. A little. I mean, I just searched a forbidden library, crashed the Sunchaser, talked to the goddess Selene- okay, you know, hearing it out loud, it comes off way worse than it sounded in my brain.

Huey

How could you keep this from us?!

Dewey

I was trying to protect you from a potentially devastating revelation.

Huey

Or you just kept it to yourself so you can feel special! Classic Dewey! She's our mom!

Dewey

Okay, it's just- First, I didn't tell you because I didn't want you to get hurt. Then I couldn't tell you because I found out all this stuff and I didn't want you to hurt me! I'm sorry, okay?

Huey

You're only sorry, 'cause you got caught!

Dewey

Louie, you okay?

Louie

You kept a secret about mom. That is not okay.

Dewey

I should have told you from the beginning. Good or bad, we're all in this together. [grabs the note] Well, I guess we're all starting from scratch.

Huey

Wait. Did you rub a pencil over this?

Dewey

Buh?

Huey

Have I taught you nothing? Junior Woodchuck Rule 217, rub all documents with a pencil.

Dewey

[gasp] The Spear of Selene! Now we know what it looks like!

Louie

Is that a date circled?

Huey

April 15th, 20- guys, this is the week we were born!

Dewey

What does that mean?

Huey

We'll find out together.

Huey

Come on, Uncle Donald! You can fix the houseboat when we get back.

Donald

Uh-uh. I'm almost done. We'll be on the water again in two days!

Donald

Seven days...

Donald

[sighs] I should get started...

Dewey

No rush!

Huey

Junior Woodchuck Rule 18: Every action, has an equal and opposite reaction.

Webby

I thought that was Newton.

Huey

Where do you think he got it from?

Webby

Science?

Scrooge

No. Not again.

Webby

[through the radio] Dewey, this is crazy! The mystery's not worth it!

Louie

[through the radio] I get it, but you can't give up the rest of us to find the one person we lost!

Launchpad

[through the radio] Dewey! The Darkwing Duck video is still running! Do you want me to pause it until you get back?

Huey

[through the radio] Give me that. Dewey, our family is amazing! We're enough! Let it go!

Dewey

[angry] Cool... so you're the reason our mom is gone!

Scrooge

[shocked] What? No! I..I--

Launchpad

[the plane begins to lean forward] Um, guys?

Dewey

You built her a crazy dangerous super rocket!

Scrooge

Which she stole early!

Huey

Then you encouraged her to keep flying through a cosmic storm? You could have called her down, there were too many variables!

Mrs. Beakley

Now boys, you don't know....

Louie

And you're the richest duck in the world! Why didn't you send up more ships to look for her?

Scrooge

[growing frustrated] I spared no expense!

Dewey

[coldly] Yeah, right. Cheap old Scrooge probably bailed as soon as it put a dent in his money bin.

Launchpad

[the plane leans further] Um, guys?

Webby

Take it easy Dewey, he may have a point. Even if gifting an experimental rocket to a mother of three was clearly a terrible idea!

Scrooge

This is a family matter! You are not family!

Mrs. Beakley

See here, McDuck. You will not speak to my granddaughter that way.

Scrooge

You will not speak to me that way! None of you! After everything I do for you, you're all nothing but trouble!

Louie

...you're the richest duck in the world! Why didn't you send up more ships to look for her?

Huey

Then you encouraged her to keep flying through a cosmic storm? ... You'd could have called her down, there were too many variables!

Dewey

...so you're the reason our mom is gone! ... Cheap old Scrooge probably bailed as soon as it put a dent in his money bin

Mrs. Beakley

Well, you've successfully pushed your family and everyone who cared about you away... again. I hope you're happy.

Scrooge

[tearing up] ...I am.

Launchpad

[bringing in drinks] Mmmm, the Family-tini. Old family recipe. Tastes like the loving embrace of family.

Huey

[looking at the drinks] Are these melted popsicles in cups?

Launchpad

The stirrer has a riddle on it.

Donald

Everybody listen up! [unintelligible jabbering]

[beat] What?

Launchpad

Did anyone get any of that?

Huey

It's mostly just context clues.

Louie

We get like every third word.

Dewey

Nope. Completely unintelligible.

Donald

I'LL SHOW YOU UNINTELLIGIBLE!!!

Huey

Hey, couple questions for you. If you were caught in the dime, how come we never saw you in it? Also, Scrooge isn't exactly magical, so how did he manage to trap you in it? Follow up. How does the lunar eclipse factor into all this?

Magica

Well, you see, I channel my powers- [beat] It's just magic, okay?!

Louie

I thought life with a treasure hunter would be way more treasure, and way less hunting.

Huey

Isn't it great?! Charting the unknown, following in the family tradition of adventure! [holding a family portrait of Donald, Scrooge, and Della]

Louie

You remember Mom got lost in space, right?

Huey

Well, yeah. But she went solo without any help. We're a fine-tuned action machine! I'm the brains, Webby's the fist, Dewey's the devil-may-care guts, you... are there too! Plus, it's earned me the rank of Senior Junior Woodchuck. Two stripes! Look, I'm sure you'll get time off after we find this treasure. Unless this treasure is cursed, and dispelling the curse leads to a whole other adventure, and so on, forever, let's go!

Louie

Fine. Hey, maybe when we get back, you can earn that sewing badge.

Huey

[laughs] Please, I earned my sewing badge ages ago. Come on, I mean-

Louie

Then how did this guy come loose?

Huey

[looks at the second stripe loose on the left sleeve; horrified] That's impossible.

Louie

Oh, you must be more tired than you realized. You're slipping.

Huey

I never would've used a slip stitch. That is amateur hour! All this constant adventuring must have torn it apart!

Louie

[gets an idea] Uncle Scrooge! All this constant adventuring is tearing us apart!

Huey

[after Gyro and Launchpad have been shrunk] Louie, I know this is our night off, but we gotta do something.

Louie

Why? Gyro's a genius, and Launchpad has crashed so many times, I'm convinced he may be immortal!

Huey

Now here's the amazing part. The vascular cambium displays three distinct growth rings the exact same distance apart. Factoring out drop deformities, this tree Scrooge found experienced three leap years in a row!

Dewey

[wrapped in a towel while soaking wet; annoyed] You dragged me out of the bath for this? What are you doing now?

Huey

Tasting for resin samples. They can… Ow. Splinter.

Dewey

I said, don't interrupt me unless something exciting happens.

Huey

What's more exciting than dendrochronology?

Dewey

Ghouls, goblins, time paradoxes, daring quests that will cement our names in history. You get the idea.

Scrooge

[as his can-phone rings] Do not answer that. [sighs] That can is your Cousin Fethry calling from a top-secret deep-sea laboratory.

Dewey

Top secret?!

Huey

Deep-sea laboratory?!

Scrooge

Don't get too excited. Fethry's a bit... well, he's, uh...

Donald

He's cuckoo bananas.

Scrooge

Best to ignore it. Every time we get a call from Fethry, we rush down there just to go on some fool's errand wrapped up in a needlessly dangerous adventure. With rambling lectures...

Donald

And the explosions...

Scrooge

And avoiding that mega-tsunami...

Donald

And the explosions...

Scrooge

All to see a barnacle formation in the shape of a tractor or some such nonsense.

Donald

Big waste of time.