Amy Madison quotes from Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Xander

Buff, for the love of God, don't open that raincoat.

Buffy

Come on! It's a party! Aren't you gonna open your present?

Xander

It's not that I don't want to. Sometimes the remote impossible possibility that you might like me was all that sustained me. But not now. Not like this. This isn't real to you, you're only here because of a spell. I mean, if I thought you had one clue what it would mean to me, but you don't, so I can't.

Buffy

[angered] So you're saying this is all a game?

Xander

A game? I... No!

Buffy

You make me feel this way, and then you reject me? What am I, a toy?

Xander

Buffy, please calm down.

Buffy

I'll calm down when you explain yourself!

Amy

Get away from him. He's mine.

Buffy

Oh, I don't think so. Xander, tell her.

Xander

What? I, uh...

Amy

He doesn't have to say. I know what his heart wants.

Buffy

Funny, I know what your face wants. [Buffy punches Amy hard in the face] What is this, you're two-timing me?

Amy

Goddess Hecate, work thy will...

Xander

Uh-oh.

Amy

... Before thee let the unclean thing crawl!

Amy

Oh my God!

Oz

Kids?

Xander

Why was your mom there?

Buffy

More bad, she picked last night, of all nights, for a surprise bonding visit.

Willow

God, your mom would actually take the time to do that with you? [Buffy looks at her] That really wasn't the point of the story, was it?

Willow

I know, Xander engaged, I couldn't believe it either.

Amy

That's so weird... so what's she like?

Willow

Thousand year old capitalist ex-demon with rabbit phobia.

Amy

That's so his type.

Amy

Everything feels weird. I mean, it's like ... I felt like I was in that cage for weeks! [Willow looks nervous] But it can still be OK ... right? I-I can still get into the swing of things, like ... prom's coming up. I-I'm so hoping Larry would ask me. We would make such a splash at... [sees Willow's expression] Oh. Oh, God. [sighs, anxiously] He hasn't asked someone else, has he?

Willow

Uh, Amy ... three things we have to talk about. One, Larry's gay. [Amy stares] Two, Larry's dead. And three, high school's ... kinda over.

Amy

How long was I in the cage? [Willow is afraid to answer] How long?!

Buffy

Hey... how've you been?

Amy

Rat. You?

Buffy

Dead.

Amy

Oh.

Willow

Hey.

Tara

Hey. I just... B-Buffy didn't come home last night... either, so...

Willow

Uh, hey, uh, this is Amy. Amy, Tara. Tara, Amy.

Amy

How you doin'?

Tara

Fine, I-I'd b-better g-get going. [Tara turns to go]

Willow

Amy! Amy the rat? Sorry.

Amy

No, that's fair. I was a rat.